Jen hugs cancer kid on TV! Saintliness bar raised!

Cafe Society
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OK, so first Jen was still the Heartbroken Madonna and Angelina was that Husband-Stealing, Brother-Frenching Whore, and Vanity Fair compared Jen’s sufferings to those of Job (I swear I am not making that up).

Then Angelina adopts an Ethiopian baby and she and Brad save everyone in Cambodia from starvation and war by the powers of their money and great beauty.

Jen, not one to take that lying down, rolls up her sleeves, and now she is hugging cancer kids on TV.

Next up: Angelina saves orphaned kittens from burning building! Jen brings peace to the Mideast! Angelina brings Elvis back from the dead! Jen reunites The Beatles! Angelina brings Ringo and Paul back from the dead!

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This might work better if they do it in the other order.

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Eve is surely referencing their careers, Twickster. :wink:

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Well, no, Jen has to kill Paul and Ringo before Angelina can bring them back from the dead.

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Angelina Jolie doesn’t have to be nicer than Anniston - she’s three times as hot and a better actress to boot. Seriously, does anyone take that little sitcom chickie’s side in this? The way I see it, the better woman won.

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:smack:

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They oughtta have Katie Holmes do the killing… nobody likes her anyway. :wink:

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Eh, you can have Angie. I’ll take Jen any day of the week and twice on Sunday.

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I assume you are referring to the ad where Jen describes the little girl developing tumors and Marlo Thomas does a plug at the end?
We saw the Jen version yesterday, and all immediately asked, “Isn’t that the same little bald girl who Robin Williams said had leukemia?” Gotta look into that further.
And - traveling slightly further off-topic - isn’t something funky going on with Robin’s hair? And isn’t it about time Marlo changed her hairstyle?

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If you think Angela is a better actor, you clearly haven’t seen The Good Girl.

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…And stopped huffing diesel exhaust fumes? She sounds like a drive thru speaker at Wendys.

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That’s the one.

Jen: “Little Cancer Girl here started having headaches, didn’t you, Little Cancer Girl?”
Little Cancer Girl: “I hit my head on the trampoline!”
Jen: “Shut up, I’m talking, and this isn’t a PSA for trampolines, it’s for brain tumors, which is what you have, Little Cancer Girl.”
[Little Cancer Girl, terrified, hugs teddy bear]
Jen: “C’mere, Little Cancer Girl, gimme a hug.”
Marlo Thomas: “Take that, Angerlina Jolie!”

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Jennifer Anniston is a good enough actress, for television. She’s no movie star.

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That was awesome Eve.

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In a joint public statement, Angelina Jolie and Mark Chapman denounced Aniston’s recent McCartney/Starr murder as “a cheap publicity stunt” and stated “neither of us will be drawn into a competition by her actions”.

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Please Aniston is beautiful. Her body is better (she didn’t f-it up with tacky tattoos). She’s more personable. Better sense of humor as far as I can tell… has Jolie ever even laughed off camera?

The only thing Jolie has is those c***sucking lips.
She made out with her brother anyway… Gross!

I did hear third hand that Aniston was a shrew of a wife though.

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. . . At which, Jennifer Aniston overthrew the US government and replaced the legislative branch with Smurfs, the judicial branch with Care Bears, and the executive branch with Fairy Princesses.

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I think I’m missing something here. “Hugging cancer kids” and helping collect money for a hospital is a bad thing? She has some kind of big ulterior motivie because…?

You lost me.

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I believe Eve was commenting on the timing of Aniston’s public service ads for the cause. As far as I recall, Aniston has never been a major figure in speaking out on causes. Jolie, on the other hand, has an established reputation as a spokeswoman for various causes. So Aniston may have decided she needed to compete with Jolie’s public image as part of their presumed feud. (And in case you missed the root cause of that, Aniston’s husband left her to take up with Jolie.)

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