Survivor: China - Ep. 1: "A Chicken's A Little Bit Smarter"

Cafe Society
1

And so we’re back! From outer space! I just walked in and found you here with … wait. Wrong train of thought. Anyway … Survivor: China premiere tonight, people! Whoo hoo! I have missed Jeff and his goofy hats and the weird eating challenges and the monkeys and the whining and the drama and the backbiting and the catfights and the etc.

(Yes, I know I should probably start watching Big Brother.)

Details about tonight’s episode, in handy spoiler boxes for your convenience.

From Yahoo! TV:

The 15th edition of the reality series strands 16 castaways in China’s Jiangxi Province. Initially, everyone comes together in Shanghai before attending a Buddhist ceremony in HuangPu Mountain’s Mi Tu…

Sorry, but that’s all the info I was able to get from Yahoo!, because the link is broken and it took me to a page about an episode of 90210 that I’ve seen already. No, I am not proud.

From TV Guide:

The 15th edition of the reality series strands 16 castaways in China’s Jiangxi Province. Initially, everyone comes together in Shanghai before attending a Buddhist ceremony in HuangPu Mountain’s Mi Tuo Temple. Next, the contestants are split into two tribes (Fei Long, Zhan Hu) and marooned on two islands on Zhelin Lake. Jeff Probst is the host.

Oh, hey, that looks exactly like the info from the Yahoo! page … hmm. They must be in cahoots. TV Guide did not take me to a 90210 page, but I was distracted by some random link about American Gladiators because apparently I need medication of some kind.

And of course the official information from CBS:

The reality show that started it all continues to raise the bar with its exotic locations and high-risk challenges on SURVIVOR: CHINA. The new competition unleashes an eclectic group of castaways on the ancient south central province of Jiang Xi, where they are prepared for adventure, danger and surprises in the hopes of winning $1 million and becoming the ultimate Survivor.

Not very exciting, but from the network’s official page you can launch to a bunch of videos and behind-the-scenes footage, including a video showing the building of the Tribal Council area.

As I already stated in another thread, I have no biases yet this season (shocker!), but as always, I will cheering for the monkeys and/or the pandas. I love me some critters.

2

Thanks for the earworm rockle. Gah!

I’ve already prepped myself with all the videos on cbs.com (Oohhh “Dreamteamers”), prepared dinner in ye olde crockpot, and warned my daughter that from 7-8 I will be ignoring her.

My sis, not a Doper, is awaiting the rankings and quips from y’all witty people that I e-mail her.

And I still call dibs on James.

I know he doesn’t last too long according to spoiler sites, but DAMN that voice of his and those muscles?? Yum

3

Sorry. And I didn’t realize until right this very moment how appropriate that song is. “I Will Survive,” indeed! Maybe that’s why it’s stuck in my head. That, or my iPod is smarter than I thought it was. Which is kind of scary.

4

Considering mine is playing “Beautiful People” by Marilyn Manson right now AND I have “I Will Survive” running in my head…

I’m confused. Beautiful people will survive?

5

Well, duh. Isn’t that what this show is all about? (See: Colby; Ethan; Jenna M.; Tom W.; Ian; Ozzy; Earl; et al.)

6

I asked this in the other thread… Does anyone know if this is going to be in HD, as they promised us last time? It doesn’t show up as “HD” on my comcast on-screen guide.

7 
I hope so, it's the only way I have been able to keep up with the last few seasons. 

 I don't have it listed as HD either, but I do recall that episodes didn't show up as HD until a few days after they aired, so perhaps this is the case here.
8

Looks like no HD. :frowning:

9

What does it mean if the local station broadcasts in HD? That it won’t look like butt on my TV? Or what? (We’re new to HDTV, since we just got the TV in July.)

10

The HD feed is broadcast on a different channel, and you can get the SD feed on the original channel. I still watch the SD version on the HD channel, though, because it sdoes looks a bit better than on the SD channel. Some SD content on HD TVs does not look good at all on the SD channels. You’ll figure that out over time.

You can’t stretch the picture to fit the whole screen when you watch SD on the HD channel, and some people don’t like that. It doesn’t bother me. And people don’t look fatter, like they do when you stretch the picture.

11

Geez…if you gave Chicken a burro, he’d be Gabby Hayes…

I’ll take a Frosti (although the sideways painter’s cap at TC lost you points, hon) and a Todd for appetizers, a James for the main course, a Jean-Robert for second course, and an Aaron for dessert. Thanks. No, no…I’ll skip the Chicken and the Dave, I think. One looks gristly and one looks a bit past its sell-by…

Sunday School teacher FRIZZED OUT by the time the Immunity Challenge happened! She looked like Mimi Kennedy in Dharma & Greg!

12

I hate Courtney already. Gah! What a bitch!

The challenge was cool

James is HAWT! Damn!

13

Hmmm … a very interesting debut. By which I mean completely frickin’ boring, except for (wait for it!) the monkeys. (!!!) But don’t mind me; I always say this at this point in the season. (See posts #23, #37, and #34 for examples.) Give me a few weeks and I’ll surely be crankier.

My patented Random Useless Tidbits™ from this episode, virtually guaranteed not to give anything of import away:
[ul]
[li]Monkeys! Oh, yeah! I am HOME, people.[/li][li]China sure is … muddy. Also, brown. I don’t know I was expecting, exactly, but it definitely wasn’t a whole lot of bamboo and wet clay dirt. Maybe I’m glad it isn’t in high def.[/li][li]No favorites yet – in fact, I am trying to keep an open mind all season long. (Go figure.) But I do think that Erik is cute, James seems to be a very beautiful person both inside and out, and Ashley’s implants are just ridiculous. She couldn’t bring the smaller economy models? Those have GOT to hurt.[/li][li]Jeff Probst is boring when he isn’t very snarky.[/li][li]More monkeys, please![/li][/ul]
I hope that next week’s challenges are better, because I want to be excited, and I’m not. Yet. I continue to hold out hope.

Oh, also: does anybody else think that Chicken looks like what you would get if Rodger and Big Tom had a bastard love child? Just me then?

14

Oh, yeah! I forgot about Ashley’s implants. I’m kind of hoping she makes it a long way into this just so I can see how grotesque those things look after the rest of her body’s been near-starving for three weeks…

15

Hmm…were Amanda and Jaime even in this ep? I honestly can’t even remember if I saw them or not.

ETA: I do remember Amanda, actually, now that I looked at her intro video. She’s the one who kind of looks like Angelina Jolie.

16

well, here we are once more.

It was ok. Still too many for me to keep them straight but some are already starting to stand out. The Lunch Lady, by God! is that a woman? :shudders:

A shame to see Chicken go. He was the one I was liking best.

The Jean-Robert dude is such an idiot. He thinks he is smart. I hope he goes next.

I love the aerials of the lake. Beautiful scenery.

What the hell is the problem with this people who come wearing high heels, cowboy boots, fish net stockings, etc? It is the same every flipping season. People, leave your house with outdoors clothing and hiking boots. How hard can that be?

17

Oh! Was it Jaime or Courtney who was not wearing a bra? I can’t tell them apart yet. Also, Amanda is the one who I think looks like Rachael Ray (in the still photo, anyway), which probably explains why her picture makes me want to barf. And, I looked it up, and she was NOT crowned Miss Earth 2006 – she didn’t even make the finals. (She was Miss Earth USA 2006, though, so maybe that’s a typo?)

18

I want him to stay for a while. He doesn’t have to be smart to make me happy. He just has to have stamina…

19

OMG, I know. The things already look like balloons!

20

Way to be an ambassador to the world with your christian faith by quickly proving how close minded you are Leslie. Drama Queen much?

I like James, PG, and Frosti so far, with lunch lady Denise in a distant second.

Ashley, Dave, And Jean-twonamesforafirstname annoy me already.