To update everyone since I posted this thread describing how we were awarded temporary custody of our nephew, Eric, here is what happened at our court hearing last week.
The court hearing was to officially appoint Mrs. D and I as legal guardians for Eric. Nothing is temporary about this. K (the deadbeat mom) and her deadbeat loser ex-husband, both decided to show up for the hearing. I was initially worried about this as they could have protested the appointment. As it turns out they didn’t say a word. We were prepared so it would have been no problem to get the appointment anyways. We had Mrs. D and myself there as well as our attorney and the Family Services case worker, all of whom were there to testify that we were the best people to be raising Eric.
This was a formal hearing, so the Judge called up Mrs. D and had our attorney ask her questions confirming that the situation has not changed with K and her ex. What I liked was that the Judge was very personable and made us feel comfortable during the proceedings. He made sure that we knew what our rights were with Eric, and also he made sure that K and her ex knew they had no legal rights to him. He emphasized that Mrs. and I were now the decision makers in all aspects of Eric’s life. This will be permanent until either K cleans herself up, or until Eric is an adult. As I have said before, Mrs. D and I are prepared to raise Eric until adulthood.
To bring everyone up to speed on what K has been doing since my last post, she ended up losing her job at the convenience store because she just couldn’t pick up using the the cash register. This was only after 2 weeks being there. She has tried applying to a couple other places as a dog groomer (which is what she is trained to do) but they didn’t hire her either, I think because they left her messages to get back with them, but she never called them back. All this is no real surprise to me. When your only worry is when and where you are getting your next fix, the rest of your brain tends not to work so well.
Eric’s father (the ex) has been homeless and in and out of jail for quite a long time. The last time he was thrown in jail, his car was impounded along with all his stuff. He has taken to squatting in my in-law’s back yard in the playhouse they have set up for the grandchildren. He’s been run off of the property at least 3 times over the past couple of months. My in-laws are gone on vacation this week. I told them I would keep an eye on the place and who was squatting out in the playhouse again? Yep. It was the ex. I ran him off and called the police, though they said there wasn’t much they could do if he was gone.
My in-laws… man do I feel sorry for them. They have been dealing with this stuff ever since K was 15. The funny thing is that they still won’t kick K out and let her hit bottom. The night before the hearing, K (who’s driver’s license has been suspended for the past few months) stole my in-law’s van, went out bar hopping, then came home stinking drunk. FIL threw her out, but who knows how long that will stay in effect. When he told me about this and that he kicked K out, I responded with, “Again?” They are just enabling her behavior by letting her stay with them, but I honestly don’t know if they are able to give her the “Tough Love” she really needs. Because FIL refuses to let K completely hit bottom, I’ve lost some respect for him, which is sad because I really do love my in-laws.
Somehow I get the feeling that K is now going to get worse because she now doesn’t have Eric, and the number of “incidences” are going to rise. We will see, I guess. For now, the melodrama continues. The important thing is that we have Eric and can keep him away from most of that crap.