Life skills test

In My Humble Opinion
1

Would you rather:

A)
[ul][li]Be able to change the oil in your car[/li][li]Know the finer points of operating a lawnmower[/li][li]Live with your mother[/li][li]Be a virgin[/li][/ul]

…or…

B)
[ul][li]Pay $30 to Jiffy Lube every month[/li][li]Barely know which end of the lawnmower to push[/li][li]Live on your own[/li][li]Have had sex with a member of your preferred gender[/li][/ul]

You only get to pick one.

According to my brother in law, one of these people is a loser.

I think my brother in law is an idiot.

2

B.

3

Yeah, I have to go with B, too. Am I a loser? :slight_smile:

4

What if I have sex with my lawnmower and I know how to change the oil in my mother?

5

B

Definately.

6

I think B but there could be some problems there:

B)

* Pay $30 to Jiffy Lube every month - fine but only if they do something for me. If I ride a bicycle it might be a scam..
* Barely know which end of the lawnmower to push - It isn't going to work well if I lay over the hot engine and push with my toes. 
* Live on your own - How would you define it if you live under a bridge and one day, a pesky "roommate" shows up and won't leave?
* Have had sex with a member of your preferred gender - Again this is fine but there are always incest, pedophilia and  necrophilia issues to take into account.
7

Have you considered that Jiffy Lube isn’t for mechanical objects… :o

8

I’d say B, but there’s nothing wrong with knowing how to mow a lawn or change the oil in a car.

9

B, because I like sex and don’t like my mother. However, I don’t really think either means you’re a loser on their own - it depends on a bunch of other stuff.

10

I don’t change my oil monthly, and I have no lawn, so I can’t answer this question.

11

In the states, being a loser is much more closely tied in with living at home and being a virgin.

Just as a cultural counterpoint, however, many people in the countryside of Japan where I am live with their families until they get married.

12

For a person is over 21, both sides have a deal breaker:

A. Sex.

B. Oil.

Granted, I have not changed my own oil in any car without a carburetor, but I just don’t understand how one can not know how to do it.

But A has another demerit: the finer points of operating a lawn mower. I know everyone needs a hobby, but I just do not get the whole lawn thing.

But A has a serious positive: Moms are great. And older Moms need help in the yard, which would explain the weird lawn mower fetish.

So, while I would prefer to BE B., I’d prefer to date A.

Assuming I like Mom.

13

I’ll take two from column A and two from column B please.

14

B, because changing the oil in a car is not nearly as fun as sex.

15

No sex and I have to live with my parents (forever?)? B please.

16

B.

I can pay someone to change my oil. I can pay someone to mow my lawn. You couldn’t pay me enough to remain a virgin and/or live with my parents.

17

I live in an apartment and I do not own a car. B, by default.

18

The oil doesn’t need changing every month.

Living with my mother is an oxymoron, but maybe she lives with me on a separate wing of the house – one with no exit.

The answer to one question provides insufficient data to determine who’s a loser.

I’m the Deciderer: I don’t care if I’m a loser.

19

That’s a big B.

Oil changes and lawn mowers are easy as pie; however, if I can only choose one that’s exactly as stated, I’d rather forget how to do both, if only for the independence and sex.

20

You’re doing it wrong. :smiley:

I choose A.