Chase Auto Finance -- bunch of effing idiots

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

OK, so we bought a car in January. Not having thousands of dollars in cash handy, we financed it. The financing was through Chase. Okey-dokey, sign us up. First statement comes, I sign up for automatic payments because I hate writing checks and do as much bill-paying automatically as possible.

Oh hey, you can sign up for paperless statements. Even better! It’s the same amount every month, so I don’t need a paper statement AND an envelope to pay it (because I’m on auto-pay) AND an ad for paperless statements :rolleyes: AND the envelope that stuff all came in sent to me every month.

So I go to the URL, create an online account in my own name (which is on the loan), and follow the bouncing ball. And get an error message. “Your account is not eligible for paperless statements, or there has been a system error.” OK, errors happen, no biggie. I try again a few times over the next few days. Same error.

W. T. F.

I call the customer service number and talk to several people, all of whom tell me that I’m NOT eligible for paperless statements. I patiently explain why this is a STUPID policy (see above) and ask to have my complaint passed upstairs. They say great, management likes to hear what people want.

I get back online to the message center and send a similar message, so at least I know my complaint will be in writing.

I get cheery boilerplate back, explaining how to sign up for paperless statements.

W. T. Bloody. F.

I won’t go into detail, but suffice it to say that I had several exchanges of messages with various Chase online reps, in which I got increasingly cranky about being sent more boilerplate and/or ignored for more than a month.

Finally today I go to the message center again for shits and giggles and there’s another message: “Oh, gee, so sorry, we just realized that the request for paperless statements has to come from the primary account holder on the loan.” That would be Mr. S. (I would also add that no instructions on how to make such a request followed.)

Mind, this is not the first time that this has happened. Yes, we’re a married couple, and businesses insist on putting his name first on our accounts. (We have different last names, thus compounding their confusion.) So he’s automatically the Top Banana, the Big Kahuna, the Grand Poobah when it comes to making any changes to the account. Never mind that my name is right there on the next line. I am a nobody.

Except at payment time. Companies have ABSOLUTELY NO TROUBLE withdrawing their PAYMENTS from a bank account that has ONLY MY NAME on it. That’s A-OK. But God forbid I want to save a few trees, or change our Dish programming or telephone service. Oh, no, then they have to talk to His Nibs. (They get an earful from him when they do, too, especially in the case of Dish Network, with whom we went a few rounds on this issue.)

So I sent a crabby note back.

Then I logged out, created a new account in his name, and signed us up for paperless statements. Turns out they don’t actually need the request to come from him; someone who’s PRETENDING TO BE HIM works just as well.

Oh yeah, that’s MUCH MORE SECURE.

What a fucking stupid system.

2

Chase has the WORST fucking website I’ve ever encountered. “We don’t recognize your computer. Fill out this information so we can confirm your identity.”

I use the SAME FUCKING COMPUTER every single time I check my CC balance. OK, shit, so I go through the thing to get the “confirmation code” fucking COPY AND PASTE IT FROM THE E-MAIL. “Code Incorrect.” Type it in myself, “Code Incorrect.” FUUUUUUUCK!!! Type again, “Your account has been locked.”

So now you have to call the fuckers. They unlock your account. But now I have to change my password. But you can’t help but not fuck up the password because it’s got about 9 million requirements. Must have at least one symbol, one number, can’t start with zero, 7-13 digits, can’t be the same as any of your last five passwords, can’t be the same as any of your contact information. Seriously. There’s a bulleted list.

And even if you reset and remember it, doesn’t fucking matter since it just randomly rejects the correct password about 30% of the time anyway.

If it wasn’t for the 8.99% I’d be out of there.

3

Oh yeah, I didn’t even mention that. Occasionally I will fumble-finger my username or password. Then I get “You have exceeded the number of login attempts and must spend ten minutes jumping through all of our annoying hoops to identify yourself.”

Because apparently the allowable number of login attempts is ONE.

:mad:

4

I have to laugh - we had something roughly similar happen with our credit union’s billpaying service a couple years back.

We have a joint account. It has free online billpaying associated to it. I handle all the household bills so I was quite familiar with the web pages etc.

There was some problem - a payment was never cleared by the recipient or some such - and the bank needed to speak with us about it.

Whoops! Did I say “us”? I meant “my husband”. It seems the billpaying service was only set up with his name on it. So the person who called wouldn’t even talk to me about it when I tried to call them to clear it up.

So they emailed my husband about it.

Only, see, the email we’d set up for such notices - was MINE.

:rolleyes:

So - they won’t speak to the wife, the co-owner of the joint account… but they’ll email anyone pretending to be the husband.

(My husband did call the credit union, and supposedly had me officially added to the billpaying service. We haven’t needed to test this since then however, so who knows whether it worked).

5

Don’t count on it.

I did the same thing as you – when I created Mr. S’s account, I used my email address (same one as on MY Chase online account) because I don’t want notices about the paperless statements going to his e-mail account, which he almost never uses. Went through with no problem. Hello!!!