I’ve always heard condoms work “if used correctly”. Supposedly, according to the other thread “most” people don’t use them correctly.
But I got to ask – how does one use a condom incorrectly? I always thought the rules were just:
put it on BEFORE your penis gets in or near the woman’s vagina,
make sure it’s unrolled all the way
be careful it doesn’t slip off when you’re withdrawing.
Seems pretty straight-forward to me. Am I missing something? Is there some other “use correctly” step that I’m missing? Or are “most” people really unable to intuitvely understand those directions?
Example 1
Movie Summer of '42.
Druggist to kid: “You know what these are for, don’t you son?”
Kid: “You fill 'em up with water and you throw 'em off the roof.”
Stranger’s with Candy had a stunning example of incorrect condom use. The health teacher first unrolled the condom all the way and then tugged it over a banana like a sock going on a foot. It seemed to be unlubricated. The technique seemed like it would result easily in a torn condom and possibly an abraded cock.
Two [your favorite ethnicity goes here] were sharing a needle doing drugs when a bystander yelled “Don’t you know that you’re going to get HIV that way”?
One of them giggled and said “It’s OK - we’re wearing condoms”.
withdrawing right before climax, putting it on, then going back in
4 putting it on long before penetration (I actually did that one on my first time)
not pinching the tip to create an air bubble for the semen. Granted, that one’s obsolete these days since 99% of the time rubbers have a reservoir up top, but I guess before that development, exploding condoms happened because our sex ed teachers kept harping on that pinch
Using the wrong kind of lube is improper use. People have been known to lubricate them with, say, hand cream, which is a really bad idea, as that tends to weaken the latex so that it tears more easily. Not to mention that I wouldn’t think it would be good to get lotion in your partner’s vagina or anus, but that’s not the point. Not using lube at all is also often improper use. Sure, a lot of them are pre-lubricated, but most aren’t lubed enough to do much good.
I don’t understand this whole pinching thing. Did these sex ed teachers not understand the physics of fluids? Air /= vacuum. Did they really emphasize it that much?
When I was a prosecutor in the paternity establishment/child support unit, there was an oft-repeated and probably apocryphal story about a woman at a wild party who reused the same condom (turned inside-out the second time) that evening, and nine months later had two kids. DNA testing showed each had a different dad; she went after both for child support.
According to one urban legend, NGO workers demonstrated to a local population how to use a condom by placing the condom on a broom handle. The locals took the condoms, but the condoms didn’t seem work. The locals did what they were taught – they too put the condom on a broom handle before getting into bed with their wives.
I think that would count as using a condom incorrectly.
Mad Magazine in Denmark offered a free condom to its readers. Inside, the condom was stapled to the page. That might also constitute as “improper use”.
Some might also call this a misuse of condoms too.
Pretty sure that’s biologically impossible, but hey, never let facts get in the way of a good story ;).
On the subject of creative condom use, I remember, when I was in high school, listening to an evening sex ed radio show. A girl called the station to ask if it was OK for her boyfriend to use a supermarket plastic bag in lieu of a condom, and if so how should they lube it. To his credit, the doc hosting the show didn’t break out in laughter - but the rest of the studio sure did.
