The Straight Dope

Go Back   Straight Dope Message Board > Main > In My Humble Opinion (IMHO)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 08-29-2011, 12:44 AM
panaccione panaccione is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,640
10 ways to make yourself

Perhaps, ways to live would have been a better title. But I digress.

1. Create something and sell it - product, service, business,'etc..
2. Gain a skill - education, training
3. Get a job
4. An investment
5. Win the lottery or have an inheritance or settlement etc..
6. Hustle - legal, illegal
7. Welfare, disability, Social Security etc..
8. Mooch
9. Prostitute
10. Steal and robbery

Thoughts?

Last edited by panaccione; 08-29-2011 at 12:46 AM.
Reply With Quote
Advertisements  
  #2  
Old 08-29-2011, 12:50 AM
Covered_In_Bees! Covered_In_Bees! is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Stub your toe at a high end restaurant/establishment of some sort, threaten to sue and make a big deal out of the situation.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-29-2011, 02:00 AM
Alice The Goon Alice The Goon is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Marry someone rich and be the stay-at-home partner. Or is that covered under mooch or prostitution?
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-29-2011, 02:10 AM
Little Nemo Little Nemo is online now
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Western New York
Posts: 47,975
11. Find objects and sell them - gold nuggets, diamonds, wild mushrooms, rare butterflies, seashells, aluminum cans
12. Live off the land - either hunting and gathering out in the wilderness or urban dumpster diving
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-29-2011, 02:58 AM
Mangetout Mangetout is online now
Charter Member
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Kingdom of Butter
Posts: 47,520
13. Be an entertainer or performer (that's different enough from 'get a jobs or 'learn a skills, right?)

Last edited by Mangetout; 08-29-2011 at 02:58 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-29-2011, 03:35 AM
LouisB LouisB is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Seminole, FL
Posts: 8,017
Move to China or Korea and teach English. Harder than it sounds, I know.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-29-2011, 06:33 AM
Jaguars! Jaguars! is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
15. Get a trade, become prominent in it, hang out your own shingle or buy out your boss when he retires, or marry the boss's daughter.
16. Raid Northumbria and recieve Danegeld.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 08-29-2011, 01:52 PM
panaccione panaccione is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,640
Quote:
Originally Posted by Covered_In_Bees! View Post
Stub your toe at a high end restaurant/establishment of some sort, threaten to sue and make a big deal out of the situation.
Ok, blackmail I probably would have put that under # 5 but there's certainly some lee-way there.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 08-29-2011, 01:53 PM
panaccione panaccione is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,640
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alice The Goon View Post
Marry someone rich and be the stay-at-home partner. Or is that covered under mooch or prostitution?
Probably closer to mooch, but a good addition none-the-less.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 08-29-2011, 01:55 PM
panaccione panaccione is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,640
Quote:
Originally Posted by Little Nemo View Post
11. Find objects and sell them - gold nuggets, diamonds, wild mushrooms, rare butterflies, seashells, aluminum cans
12. Live off the land - either hunting and gathering out in the wilderness or urban dumpster diving
Certainly original there.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 08-29-2011, 01:56 PM
panaccione panaccione is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,640
Quote:
Originally Posted by LouisB View Post
Move to China or Korea and teach English. Harder than it sounds, I know.
Sounds like a job, or perhaps skill?
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 08-29-2011, 01:59 PM
panaccione panaccione is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,640
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaguars! View Post
15. Get a trade, become prominent in it, hang out your own shingle or buy out your boss when he retires, or marry the boss's daughter.
16. Raid Northumbria and recieve Danegeld.
#15 - pretty close to inheritance
#16 - I have no idea. a little clarity?
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 08-29-2011, 03:10 PM
accidental2 accidental2 is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
How about an 17th?

I would have $0-today, but for Old Age Pension, if guy I dated hadn't been speeding, rolled the car, which accident broke my back and disabled me for life. I was 30

Naturally I won the civil suit.

Then 40 years later I was in my wheelchair on the sidewalk and a car ran me down. That was 2½ years ago and my lawyer is now preparing the papers for my claim against the driver's Insurance Co.

If that goes on every 40 years, I'll be 110 for the next round!

OMG! I just noticed my pen-name. I never thought until I saw this on-line.

Last edited by accidental2; 08-29-2011 at 03:12 PM. Reason: add
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 08-29-2011, 03:38 PM
Rigamarole Rigamarole is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
My favorite is the joke about the rich old man:

A young man met a wealthy older man one day and decided to ask him how he came to reach his impressive economic station in life. The man said to him,

"Well, it was the height of the Great Depression and I had only a nickle to my name. I took that nickle and bought an apple, then I spent all day polishing it. At the end of the day I sold it for 10 cents. The next day, I bought two apples and did the same thing. I kept at this for a month until I had earned $1.50.

Then, my wife's father died and we inherited two million dollars."
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 08-29-2011, 03:54 PM
Jaguars! Jaguars! is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Danegeld
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:13 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2013, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

Send questions for Cecil Adams to: cecil@chicagoreader.com

Send comments about this website to: webmaster@straightdope.com

Terms of Use / Privacy Policy

Advertise on the Straight Dope!
(Your direct line to thousands of the smartest, hippest people on the planet, plus a few total dipsticks.)

Publishers - interested in subscribing to the Straight Dope?
Write to: sdsubscriptions@chicagoreader.com.

Copyright © 2013 Sun-Times Media, LLC.