Homeschooling biology FAILURE

Dumbfuck homeschool shill Kevin Swanson fails at basic reproductive biology:

My, my. The wingnuts just keep sinking lower…

If you follow the link to the original story, it’s even nuttier. You see, it all started with Hitler…

Thanks for the nightmares, fella!

There’s not enough facepalm in the world for this guy.

This was in the stupid Republican thread, but I think it is a topic by itself.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=15964281&postcount=8455

It has always seemed disingenuous to me that anti-abortionists do not routinely hand out free condoms at their protests.

Maybe “pro-life” needs another name like, “let us control your gonads”, which is more descriptive.

The current wing-nut motto"

“Welcome to the fact free community!”

What I always find irresistibly mystifying in these wingnut stories is trying to figure out what particular grain of actual information the wingnuts latched onto and unrecognizably distorted with their clueless speculation. And I think I’ve got it!

Emphasis added. I think that must have been the ultimate source of this bizarre idea. You can easily see how “occasionally occurring fertilized ova are prevented by oral-contraceptive hormones from developing in the uterus” could be interpreted as “women on birth control have lots and lots of little tiny dead-baby fetuses embedded in their wombs”. If you’re a clueless moron ignorant of reproductive biology, that is.

Good Lord…

What kind of f’n fruit boot thinks of this shit? There can’t be more than a handful of people who believe this, right!?!

Kimstu: good work identifying the likely origin of the (grotesque and stupid!) misconception (pun intended.) This kind of analysis is fascinating!

(It reminds me of Stephen Jay Gould tracking down the origin of the VERY commonplace description of Eohippus as “about the size of a small fox terrier.”)

Hey, waitaminnit! This is the Pit! You left out the cuss-words!

Exactly. Something which says that fetuses are hardly ever made and can’t stay in the uterus if they are is easily interpreted to mean women make dozens of dead baby fetuses which get stuck in their uteruses…if you’re a total moron living in Backwardsville. :smack:

They’re just sitting there, stuck to the uterine wall, waving their tiny little arms and crying out for help.

And here I spent a decade on the pill, thinking it gave me gas.

It might make for a decent horror movie. At least a made-for-TV on the Sci-Fi channel type.

A long time ago I heard (where? I don’t know) that if a woman has a hysterectomy the doctor can somehow “see” how many zygotes have implanted in a woman’s uterus. The surprising thing about this (I heard, again) was that most women have the marks of several more implantations than they thought they ought to; in other words, women spontaneously abort many pregnancies before they even realize they are pregnant. Of course, that’s something I’ve heard repeatedly from reliable sources.

I have no idea if any of that is true.

But if it is, or if someone else heard the same thing and was a moron, they could probably twist it into the baloney from the OP.

Ooops, sorry! Wait, no, I mean oh drat. Pickles! Son of a Patagonian postal worker! Sorry, I can’t do my thinks and my swears at the same time. :slight_smile:

That part is mostly true. It’s also given root to the notion that abortions make you infertile. The truth is that zygotes can’t implant where there’s scar tissue, and the placenta detaching does tend to create a scar. So if you’ve had lots of pregnancies (whether they ended in miscarriage, abortion or birth), your risk of future miscarriages does go up, because there are just fewer spots left for good implantation and a strong placenta.

A-ha! That must be what Swanson meant by “the surgery”:

Oh, and here we go:

miss elizabeth, you’re brilliant. This is undoubtedly the issue that forms the microscopic factual core of Swanson’s utterly bizarre claim.

As WhyNot noted, all Swanson did was mistake “menstruation flushing a rejected zygote out of the womb” for “rejected zygotes becoming embedded as tiny dead babies inside the womb”, and “women on oral contraceptives produce far fewer dead-baby rejected zygotes than women not on them” for “only women on oral contraceptives accumulate these dead-baby rejected zygotes”.

Heck, those are pretty trivial errors, aren’t they? I say we give the poor guy a pass. Preferably a pass for a first-class aisle seat on the next outbound Mars rover.

If anything, that’s an argument for abortion!

I imagine they think a woman’s womb looks like this:

What pisses me off isn’t just that there are idiots out there who think this crap up, but there are even more idiots who listen to and believe them.

snicker

it really would.

that makes sense, unless that jackass actually believes that an egg needs to implant and grow into a full baby to get out of the body, though I wonder what he thinks the menses are in that case. :dubious: