How’d you get started? By which I mean: how’d you know to go to public restrooms for sex in the first place, and how did you learn the signals?
God, I don’t even remember. I think the first one I actually started going to was at a mall in my hometown. It was a restroom with a coin-op door, and I think I went in first purely because I had to use the restroom. About partway through, I realized that THINGS WERE GOING ON! And I wanted in!
I was 14.
I have to say that in decades of public restroom use, I have never touched another person’s foot with mine, reached under a stall (except to pass a roll of paper), etc. To me these would clear signals of Something Out Of The Ordinary whether I knew to interpret them as sexual or not. It just isn’t done, and I assume this is even more true in men’s rooms.
Another former restroom player here. Yeah, that was probably a factor in my stopping as well. You’ve gotta be really limber for some of the positions you find yourself in . . . lots of squatting, hard on the knees . . . especially if you’re like me, the suckee rather than the sucker. If the discomfort outweighs the reward, it’s simply not worth it. Of course, all that’s on your mind is the reward; you don’t realize all the discomfort till you try to get up afterwards. Plus, of course, as we age our priorities change, and quick sex no longer has the allure it had 30 years ago.
Regarding diseases: My wild days were already winding down when AIDS reared its ugly head, and it would have been unthinkable to use a condom. Condoms were for straight people who didn’t want to get pregnant. Even the classic STDs were no more trouble than a trip to the free clinic, though I believe herpes was starting to go around at that time. I, for one, never had an STD . . . definitely one of the lucky ones (well, being the suckee had something to do with that).
In the years (decades) since I stopped my public fun, I’ve occasionally gotten unprovoked signals from someone in the next stall, and I concentrate real hard on *not moving anything and not making a sound. *I don’t have anything against guys who still do these things, but it’s just not my thing anymore.
What does bother me, though, is when the guy in the next stall is talking on his cell phone. This seems to violate some profound Law of Nature.
Well, now if I’m ever in a public restroom and hear tapping, I’ll just say “It’s not my thing, Senator.”
I can attest to jayjay’s and panache45’s veracity. I’m not gay, but I was a trucker for 24 years. Truck stops and interstate rest areas are popular spots for gay trolling. I’ve been ‘flirted’ w/ any number of times. It’s usually subtle and difficult to explain, but you normally recognize it when you see it. In truck stop men’s rooms, it’s common to see graffiti giving a date and time, along w/ a CB channel and CB “handle”, accompanied by a brief description of the desires or services available. As I said, I did not indulge and when approached, usually just ignored the overature, which was sufficient to discourage any further attempts.
The thrill of having sex in a public place, inspired by the risk of discovery, is not uncommon among heterosexuals. Why would homosexuals not have similar desires?
I posted this in the other (PIT) thread: (I had no doubt that Craig was cruising)* But why should that be illegal and why do the police need to waste my tax dollars setting up stings for it? I mean- if I smile in a certain way, send a drink down through the bartender, and ask “How yew doin’?” to a woman, those are generally recognized signals for a one-night stand, but would I be arrested? No, but only because I am going for casual sex with someone of the opposite sex.
Now, yes, if two people (of whatever sex) are actually having sex in a public restroom, I have no problem at all with the police breaking it up. But I should imagine that sometimes a gay “meet” in a restroom is followed by casual sex outside somewhere more private?*
It’s one of the components of GAYDAR. You can just sense the cruising areas and any guys who are there cruising stick out like a sore thumb.
Oh, that’s not a thumb?
Cute
panache45, jayjay and truckers discussing anonymous bathroom sex? I need to go down to the basement. I’ll be back in about 20 minutes.
Take pictures, please.
I thought I was pretty hip, pretty knowledgeable about the ways of the world. But I had no idea this secret signaling thing went on in men’s bathrooms. I think it should be something that’s targeted as a crime. Soliciting for sex in a public place should not be okay. These people aren’t flirting- they don’t want a date or a relationship.
Can you imagine if women did this? I’d be all, "Oh, hey, cute shoes! What are you doing?!" :eek:
I’d be interested in hearing more about this. Could you post that either here or in the Pit thread?
Okay, you’ve totally squicked me out.
You KNEEL on the floor? IN A PUBLIC BATHROOM? Do you know how many germs must be crawling around?
With the advent of the iPod, I can see how there could be some really horrific misunderstandings. One minute, you’re tip-tapping along to the Best of Leo Sayer and the next thing you know, a hairy penis rears its ugly head beneath your stall.
That is hilarious. I am sitting at my desk, at work! laughing like an idiot child.
Once again the Dope has fought ignorance. Here I am mid thirties, thinking that I am a worldly individual, and bam, guess what is apparently going on all around you that you’ve never noticed.
The bad thing of course now is that every time I ever go to a public toilet from now on, I’m going to be uber conscious to what’s going on, and trying to eyeball all the other guys in there to work out what they’re in here for! :smack:
One of the restrooms in the Galleria in Houston was notorious as a gay cruise area. Sometimes everyone in there would be after sex. It was creepy. I had a roomate at the time (gay) who worked in the Galleria and would go get a blow job at lunch almost everyday.
After patrolling the area many times and trying to stop the activity in several ways, the mall finally lowered the stall partitions about two feet so the tops of them were like about four feet high and there wasn’t any privacy.
Aw, you say that like it’s a bad thing.
Excuse me…I’ll be downstairs with chaoticbear…
I just want to add a comment that an LJ friend of mine made on his journal about this subject and Senator Craig in particular:
So, you know, it’s not just me. 