SmithWife is expecting our second child, and we’ve decided that two offspring is enough for us (ToddlerSmith f.k.a. BabySmith will be 2 in a few weeks). We’ve got what we think are a few sound reasons for the closing of Smith Family Procreation…
We just think two is enough for us (not to disparage those with larger families)
We’re both 34, and our age certainly is a factor (again, just our opinion)
Due to my recent Emergency Appendectomy, I’m in no hurry to go “under the knife” again. Any knife.
Well as far as making yourself infertile, there’s three options: vasectomy, castration, and some rather hard to get, very expensive hormone injections they use for guys with prostate cancer.
As far as birth control, there’s a whole world of other options besides the pill. There’s the patch, the ring, the various shots, and IUD’s, all of which are similar to or better than the pill for reliability. There’s also tubal ligation, which I believe is often done laparascopically and can be done while she’s still in the hospital post-delivery. Many women who can’t take the pill tolerate Nuvaring very well, and others do wonderfully on the minipill or other progestin-only methods. I can’t take the pill, either, so I wound up with a Mirena, and it’s the greatest thing ever. I haven’t had a menstrual cramp since July, and I haven’t had a period since August. The insertion was no picnic, but I love me some progestin. Love, love, love.
Would it be okay if, going forward, we refrain from using the words “bite” and “castration” in the same thread?
Constant masturbation lowers your sperm count, I believe. It also makes you blind and makes your palms hairy, so you’ll have to take that into consideration.
Stick a big hunk of plutonium down your pants. After a few weeks of that, you’ll be totally sterile. That, or your penis will go on to terrorize some small island nation in the Pacific. These things are never certain.
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[li]Blunt trauma. Maybe a war wound a la Jake Barnes. You know, visit Bosnia or something. If you can’t afford the airfare, you could always get a hammer. [/li][li]Disease. You could try getting a disease that results in inflammation of the testes and scrotum, thereby causing sterility. You had the mumps? If that’s out, my pen pal Camilla cites Merck’s Medical Manual: “Epididymo-orchitis (inflammation of the epididymis and testis) may be a complication of urinary infection with prostatitis or urethritis, a sequela to gonorrhea, a complication of prostatic surgery or as a result of infection secondary to an indwelling catheter.” Enough to get you started.[/ul][/li][/quote]
