RIP Mitch Hedberg

As many of you may know, Mitch Hedberg died. In memory of him share your favorite quotes by him. Here’s mine:

He’s closing in on the Pope and Terri Schiavo!

Passing Fred Phelps, leaving him to battle with Jack Chick, who was just passed by Phred on the inside.

Ha! Due to a premature radio report, I was discussing the Pope’s death on Friday afternoon with my high school students. While I’m sure some were saddened, the tone of the conversation was respectful, but fairly light and not one of great grief. Then I mentioned that Mitch Hedberg had died, and there was a chorus of “WHAT? Man, that sucks! Now I’m really bummed.”

My favorite Mitch quote:

“I think Bigfoot is blurry, that’s the problem. It’s not the photographer’s fault. Bigfoot is blurry. And that’s extra scary to me, because there’s a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside. Run. He’s fuzzy. Get outta here.”

Wow, that is so seriously depressing. And I have his obit right here, in my hand, from the Minneapolis paper, so it’s totally for real. I quoted Mitch as recently as yesterday. Too sad to quote him now. :frowning:
ZJ

I, too, was very saddened to hear about Mitch. I had been keeping my eye on him to get big.

“I don’t have a girlfriend, I just know a woman who would be really mad to hear me say that.” -M.H.

You know how those McDonalds ads always say “prices and participation may vary”? Well, I wanna own a McDonalds that doesn’t participate in shit! “You got any cheeseburgers?” NOPE! We got Spaghetti! And blankets.

I don’t want to be on the Wheaties box, I wanna be on the Rice Krispies box. Snap, Krackle, Mitch, and Pop. People would say “How’d you get on the Rice Krispies box?” I’d say “In Hollywood, it’s all who you know and I know Krackle.”