While it does not mention a particular day, it does say this:
So your #5 may not hold up in a theological discussion. 
The solution is simple. If you feel like you should go to church, but don’t like it, then find a church you like. There are lots. Personally, I like the Episcopal services - but even then, you have to find one that fits. Even within one denomination, there will be a lot of variety. (As far as people not being friendly… have you tried talking to any of them?)
Or, if you don’t feel any compunction to go … don’t go.
I’ve had many Sunday mornings when I’d have rather stayed in bed, but now when I miss church, I actually miss church.
As far as we know, Jesus never came. 
(I’d so go to hell if I weren’t Jewish/atheist.)
Maybe you were doing it wrong?
Or Episcopalianism. We do that too.
I know that feeling too. When I was a kid, we went to church too, and saw right through our parents’ reasons for doing it - impressing the neighbors, and going there to see and be seen. By the time we were tweens, we were old enough to articulate this, and we did stop going. And they never picked another church, either.
Like Ezekiel 23:20? NSFW.
(Moderator: Do a spoiler box if you deem it necessary.)
Yep. That’s in the Bible.
Not really. I’m the same way. I feel that if my non-Christian friends and acquaintances change their mind and become interested in Christianity, they know where to go to find out more. They don’t try to convert me to their beliefs, either, although I have had a rather militant atheist friend (she’s now in a nursing home) who spammed her Facebook feed with all kinds of “dickhead atheist” memes. Not a small number of people finally told her, “We get it. REALLY. WE.GET.IT”.
As for Smartphones, etc. my pastor’s wife checks hers during the service, although IDK why and it’s NOMB.
Several years ago, I went to another church, and the teenage girls all sat together and texted each other during the sermon. I thought, “Wow, how rude!” and then remembered how my friends and I did something similar at that age (they invited me to their church) - using pen and paper. By the time the service was over, there usually wasn’t a clean square centimeter on that bulletin.
You probably needed to practice harder. I think there are different grades and when you get to the higher levels eg. Priest, Pope, Saint, etc…, then the perks start kicking in.
Levitate 10 feet above the pew, vomit pea soup and spin your head around 360 degrees. The church will dis-invite you from attending any more services.
Ah. See, one of the tales we tell about Jesus is that he went to temple when he was a kid and asked all manner of awkward questions. He continued the practice as he grew older and, as the tale goes, things went really, really badly for him.
Worst part about church; if you fart, they make you sit in your own pew.
I was raised catholic and went to mass every Sunday, Holy Day of Obligation, First Friday and a few others. I hated it from about age 15, maybe sooner. This was the deal right up until I went away to college. I can’t remember if the Sunday mass bit started again when I was home for the summers or not. I think not but that was a long time ago. If I did, it was only out of respect to my mother. Once I moved out for good I never voluntarily went to church again. Weddings and funerals are about it. My mother was pretty devout but also was smart enough to realize that religion is a personal choice and I never heard her criticize anyone for their beliefs or lack thereof. So, hang in there, move out or try to have a rational conversation with your mother about why you’d rather not go.
Interesting topic-I am RC, and I have noticed that many young people do not attend, once they move out from the parents. i wonder if this is because they find the service boring, or because they have essentially abandoned religion. The interesting thing is that some churches still offer the Latin Mass 9and these are usually packed).
According to this article one of the reasons for the decline in church attendance is the Christian Right making religion political and turning younger liberals away.
I have many openly Atheist friends who know that I am Christian. If they want to join me at church, they know that I would love it. The closest to outright proselytizing they get from me is that when I host dinners for holidays I do open with a prayer. They all knew in advance it was coming, in case they wanted to make themselves scarce.
So my form of evangelism is NOT being an asshole about it, and instead openly showing that you can be Christian without being cruel about it.
Its a soft sell.
How do the snakes juggle without hands?
Don’t asp me.
That’s why mainline denominations (Presbyterian, Methodist, Episcopal) are growing. Well, not growing, exactly, but not shrinking. Well, yes, technically they are shrinking, but not as quickly as others. Well, not as quickly as some others but faster than some. What was the question again?
United Methodist is actually an odd one. It’s shrinking in the US but growing in Africa, Asia, Central and South America. There’s often talk of a split.
How do you feel about people who spam Facebook feeds with religious messages? " ‘LIKE’ if JESUS is your LORD!'" “Share this, don’t deny JESUS IS LORD! Who is brave enough?” And so on, ad nauseam.
I ignore them, as the religious people in my family generally ignore my atheist posts (although one family member did respond to my FB Ask An Atheist Day post with a good question!).