I have a 12 year old daughter who has decided that she wants to be a vegetarian. While the last thing I want to do is create food issues with a pre teen, I can’t help thinking that nutritionally, this is not a sound idea for someone her age. Am I wrong in believing that the importance of meat protein and iron for a growing child should outweigh whatever her reasons are for not eating meat?
If I let her go ahead with this, my biggest problem then is what the heck to feed her. She doesn’t actually like that many vegetables and being a little overweight, my big issue will be if she starts substituting the high carb pasta, rice and potatoes for the meat.
Trying not to turn this into a control issue so any advise is appreciated.
I’m not a vegetarian, but I do believe that it’s not really all that hard to eat healthily if you’re a vegetarian at any age. Protein and iron occur in a variety of foods and you can easily get plenty of both with a vegetarian diet.
I’d be more concerned with her not liking many vegetables, eating too much white carbs (you mention pasta, rice, potatoes), and making her mother fix two different meals all the time. She may want to eat vegetarian, but does she understand what’s involved? Can she fix her own meals at least some of the time when the rest of the family eats meat? Is she planning on subsisting on pasta and baked potatoes? Those would be my red flags.
It doesn’t have to be a health issue if she learns to mix proteins properly. Maybe she doesn’t have to be completely vegan and would allow eggs or fish. Tuna is a complete protein with no fat when packaged in water. It’s laudable that you daughter is interested in nutrition and health. Not liking vegetables could be a problem for one who wants to become a vegan. It seems her motivation is largely as a means to weight reduction. My weight has been up and down a few pounds over the years. I have found that when I eat naturally and avoid any product that has a complicated label of ingredients, the weight just falls off precipitously. All the fat goes away. The taste buds respond and vegetables taste much better. This could work for you daughter too. She’s the one who wants to change so she has to do some work.
Why does she want to be a vegetarian? Does she think it will help her lose weight? If that’s the reason, she may have unrealistic expectations about what being vegetarian can do.
OTOH, I don’t think there’s any nutritionally good reason why she shouldn’t be able to pull it off. She just has to emphasize iron and calcium and protein and make sure she’s eating in a more balanced way.
I think it’s okay provided you get your protein intake in from sources like dairy (increasingly low fat as you get older) and eggs and legumes. Vegetarianism is pretty widespread in Indian culture, although I hail from a pescatarian subgroup. About 4/7 days we’re vegetarian at our house.
You’re right that it is easy to fall into eating more carbs than you should, especially if your cuisine of origin doesn’t specialise in vegetarian dishes. Even for Indians who know how to cook and eat a wide variety of vegetables as main dishes it’s absolutely a risk and something my parents had to learn to cut back on quite a bit when we moved to N. America-they were from a walk everywhere culture/do everything mechanically (they both grew up grinding wheat and drawing well water for instance) culture and needed the energy carbs provided. In the US we’ve learned to really limit the white starchy carbs and eat more of the main vegetable dishes etc.
You have to be really on the ball about taking your vitamins. My mom, sister and I were all diagnosed with anemia about 12 years ago and it was probably made worse by the fact that we never ate red meat growing up.
So my answer is that it’s not a nutritionally BAD choice in any way but I do get where you’re coming from. However, if you don’t come from a vegetarian family and/or vegetarian cuisine culture, you’re the only person in your family who is a vegetarian and on top of that you’re an adolescent (generally irresponsible), I’m not convinced you’re a) going to have an easy time making healthy choices and b) that you have the maturity to think about stuff like taking your vitamins, making sure to get low fat dairy protein in everyday etc. etc…
I mean, in all honesty, I pretty much loathe vegetarian American cuisine. I’ll usually only eat it at dinners and restaurants if the only meat options are red meat (beef/pork, which I don’t consume for religious reasons/personal reasons respectively). When I eat/make vegetarian food at home I’m eating almost exclusively ethnic, usually Asian/Indian, cuisines because you get a wider variety of vegetables and spices to work with.
I think it’s okay provided you get your protein intake in from sources like dairy (increasingly low fat as you get older) and eggs and legumes. Vegetarianism is pretty widespread in Indian culture, although I hail from a pescatarian subgroup. About 4/7 days we’re vegetarian at our house.
You’re right that it is easy to fall into eating more carbs than you should, especially if your cuisine of origin doesn’t specialise in vegetarian dishes. Even for Indians who know how to cook and eat a wide variety of vegetables as main dishes it’s absolutely a risk and something my parents had to learn to cut back on quite a bit when we moved to N. America-they were from a walk everywhere culture/do everything mechanically (they both grew up grinding wheat and drawing well water for instance) culture and needed the energy carbs provided. In the US we’ve learned to really limit the white starchy carbs and eat more of the main vegetable dishes etc.
You have to be really on the ball about taking your vitamins. My mom, sister and I were all diagnosed with anemia about 12 years ago and it was probably made worse by the fact that we never ate red meat growing up.
So my answer is that it’s not a nutritionally BAD choice in any way but I do get where you’re coming from. However, if you don’t come from a vegetarian family and/or vegetarian cuisine culture, you’re the only person in your family who is a vegetarian and on top of that you’re an adolescent (generally irresponsible), I’m not convinced you’re a) going to have an easy time making healthy choices, especially if you aren’t adventurous at least in terms of spices and different types of vegetables/legumes and b) that you have the maturity to think about stuff like taking your vitamins, making sure to get low fat dairy protein in everyday etc. etc…
I mean, in all honesty, I pretty much loathe vegetarian American cuisine. I’ll usually only eat it at dinners and restaurants if the only meat options are red meat (beef/pork, which I don’t consume for religious reasons/personal reasons respectively). When I eat/make vegetarian food at home I’m eating almost exclusively ethnic, usually Asian/Indian, cuisines because you get a wider variety of vegetables and spices to work with.
You could view it as a food adventure for the rest of the family - try other cuisines with less meat, that sort of thing. Maybe make a deal with her that, say, 4 days a week the family will try a vegetarian meal also, if nobody objects, and otherwise she’s on her own?
Of course, I’m saying that coming from a household where we probably eat meat, I dunno, three days a week. My dad would have a heart attack if my mom told him there would be meals with no meat. YMMV.
When I became a vegetarian, my mother made me buy, read and report on a number of books on becoming vegetarian in your teens. Basically she made it up to me to convince her that it would be nutritionally sound. I resented it at the time, but I think I learned a lot about nutrition and have developed one of the more nutritionally sound diets in my family. While it may not make you lose weight (I gained) become vegetarian is a good way to become more conscious and thoughtful about your food choices.
My GF became a veggie around that age. Eventually she converted her whole family because her mother got tired of cooking two separate dinners every day.
I’m sorry, I can’t let this stand. Tuna DOES contain fat, even when packed with water. It’s animal flesh, it contains fat, even if it’s a relatively low fat variety of flesh. Where on earth did you get the idea it’s somehow naturally fat-free?
One of my girlfriends was vegetarian for 30 years (she just started eating meat last year). Her mother took sven’s mother’s approach - you can do this, but you need to do the work and menu planning and research to make sure its nutritionally sound. I’d also talk to her about the dangers of subbing carbs - vegetarians eat a lot of VEGETABLES - they aren’t breadatarians. She is going to need to find vegetables she likes for this to work, because that is where a lot of her iron and vitamins will come from. And she will need to eat whole grains.
As to what to feed her, I suggest she does some feeding of herself. Say twice a week you will make a whole family vegetarian meal. But the rest of the time she should learn quick how to make her own. I’d start with the aforementioned Indian food or Asian food - both are easy to do vegetarian. Rice and bean dishes are served the world over. When we do buffets with my girlfriends where we are feeding some vegetarians and some meat eaters, pasta (with meat and without) and tacos (with meat and without) work well. Tofu is surprisingly good. There are a lot of meat substitutes out there for you to stick in the freezer (Boca burgers, Morningstar farm chicken nuggets).
I know plenty of kids who grow up on vegetarian diets, and they grow up healthy.
One of my favorite blogs is cheaphealthygood. Once a week they do a vegetarian entry, but the blog is pretty veggie friendly all week long.
I became full vegetarian at about that age which didn’t come as a surprise to anyone because I’ve never particularly enjoyed meat.
It’s a perfectly healthy way to eat and as Dangerosa mentioned, there are many meat substitutes you can get that can work for the whole family. I regularly make tacos with veggie meat substitute for my husband and I (he’s pretty pro-meat) and we had his mom over for dinner and served veggie burgers and she had no idea they weren’t meat. In fact at one point she said ‘I guess this means you’re eating meat now Alice?’ Heh - that’s a veggie burger Dot. She had no clue.
So, from that point of view if you want to support your daughter you could probably sneak in a veggie meal or two each week for the whole family.
I also agree with the other posters who said that your daughter is really going to have to do some research herself and figure out what types of vegetarian food she will like. If it’s a bunch of her friends at school that decided to do this to ‘lose weight’ or ‘save animals’ or whatever, it probably won’t last very long. If she really doesn’t like meat it may stick better.
Finally (and no slam is intended here) - is it possible that she enjoys vegetables but just not the way you prepare them? I know that both my mother and MIL boil the shit out of veg and then my mom dumps butter and salad dressing all over them before they make it to the table. Blargh!!!
Actually, a properly done vegetarian diet is sound nutrition at any age. The key here is being proper nutrition. Living on white bread and french fries is technically vegetarian but it’s terrible nutrition. A good vegetarian diet, like any good diet, requires a variety of food from several different food groups.
You’re wrong on the meat protein angle. Plant protein is just as useful to the body, and again proper choice of food for a vegetarian will result in a diet with just as much, or even more, usable protein than a diet including meat.
The only thing animal food products are essential for is vitamin B12… which is truly vital. However, your body needs only minute amounts of it and almost any animal product will provide sufficient amounts, so a vegetarian that eats eggs or dairy products will get adequate amounts. If she opts to go vegan - no animal products at all (which I don’t recommend as getting a balanced diet is harder with that one) - then she needs to take a B12 supplement.
The iron issue is of some concern, particularly for a young woman given a normal woman’s regular blood and iron loss with her menstrual cycle. There are plant based foods that are relatively high in iron, there are iron-fortified foods, and cooking in cast iron also increases food’s iron content. If she does opt to go vegetarian be sure she is checked for anemia and if it occurs an iron supplement may be called for - but plenty of vegetarian women eat adequate amounts of iron on their own. This does vary from person to person.
THAT is a big concern - she doesn’t like vegetables, but she wants to be a vegetarian, uh-huh… :dubious:
Is she interested in this as weight control, or is it a dislike of meat, or something all her friends are doing? Or a bit of all of the above?
Hmm… I suppose if it were my daughter (I don’t have kids, but I remember being one) I’d praise her for being willing to assume responsibility for her own diet. It’s an adult thing to do (even if a lot of adults do a bad job of it). But tell her that you don’t know much about it, and that she needs to educate you. Ask her for a week’s meal plan - that will give you an idea of what she thinks is OK at this point, which will tell you a lot about whether you need to worry or not (particularly if you come back here with it where more knowledgeable folks can help you out).
What you, as a concerned parent, need to look for:
**Protein: ** here are common vegetarian protein sources - rice+beans/peas, beans/peas+any grain (whole grain preferred), potato+milk/cheese/other dairy, soybean/tofu, nuts, seeds, seitan, and "textured vegetable protein. There is also Quorn, which I wouldn’t call common but might be available in your area.
Calcium: her skeleton is still growing at her age, so this is very important. If she eats dairy that’s great - if it replaces meat as her main protein source she should be doing at least as well as she is now, if not better. Many types of fish have calcium (even if eating fish isn’t really vegetarian, for some reason in the west that’s not considered “meat” even though it’s from an animal). You can get calcium fortified foods like tofu and orange juice. Dark green vegetables often are relatively high in calcium for vegetables. There are calcium supplements if she’s going completely vegan.
Iron: dark green vegetables, for the most part. Also, iron-fortified foods. Most breakfast cereals, for instance, seem to be iron-fortified (read the labels). So are a lot of breads (again, read the label).
Actual vegetables and fruit: as you already know, living on potatoes and white rice might be vegetarian but it’s not healthy.
While there are a lot more nuances, in my opinion those are the items to start with.
Now, there’s the problem of what she’s eating vs. what the rest of the family is eating. It would be highly unreasonable for the family cook to be expected to prepare to entirely separate meals. There are several solutions, and the great part is that you can utilize all of them:
Have her learn to do her own food preparation. No reason she can’t get her own breakfast and lunch at this point, particularly on school days.
Have a vegetarian-friendly dinner once or twice a week. Some vegetarian foods, such as Quorn products and Bocaburgers, are designed in such a way that many omnivores like them, too. It’s an adventure for the whole family! A potato+dairy entree, meatless lasagna, and a number of other entrees could well appeal to the whole family, and you might be eating some of these already without considering that they are either meatless or could be easily made so. (My family is omnivorous in my generation, but we’ve got so many of these vegetarian entrees on our lists of food we like that when our predominantly vegetarian younger generation shows up at family gatherings it’s relatively simple to put together something everyone will enjoy)
If the family is eating something like roast beef or steak then obviously she’ll need a main course for her. And she can help with the cooking here, too. But if you’re cooking steak on the grill then she can grill tofu or vegetables alongside the meat. If you’re having roast beef then she can cook enough of her entree so that others can enjoy some as a side dish. And there’s no reason she can’t have any of the traditional sides that go with roast beef or steak or whatever. In fact, if you have something like baked potatoes she can add some toppings to hers to make an entree, have some salad, dinner rolls, etc… that way she’s still eating with everyone else and not off in her own dietary corner.
Two additional rules:
A) no one makes fun of or makes rude comments about anyone else’s food choices, ever.
B) if she “backslides” and grabs something meaty once in awhile no comments, no teasing, no mocking. Changing one’s diet that completely is hard, and after experimenting she might decide vegetarianism isn’t for her after all. Teens are weird enough about food, don’t let anyone in the family make it worse.
Some cuisines which are vegetarian-friendly (some already mentioned):
**Indian **- India has one billion people and counting, many being vegetarian. Lots to choose from there, and clearly avoiding meat hasn’t adversely affected their numbers.
**China **- another billion+ country with a lot of vegetarians. China has MANY cuisines to choose from, everything from very bland to lava-hot spicy.
**Other Asian **- Vietnam, Thailand, Japan… seems like every Asian country has a collection of vegetarian recopies.
Mediterranean - hummus, other dips like babaganouge (eggplant), tahini, (sesame seed based), use of things like chickpeas, lentils, various cheeses, yogurt sauces…
**Mexican **- rice and beans, meatless tacos, bean burritos…
Encourage her to try new and “exotic” vegetables and fruits. Encourage her to cook familiar ones in new ways (I used to think I hated spinach and other greens - found out what I actually hated was how mom cooked them. Now I can’t seem to get enough of them!)
a child may have her own ideas of what being a ‘vegetarian’ actually means, so i think the exact reason why she wants to be a vegetarian in the first place is important. it’s certainly confusing enough for adults with all the variants out there.
Sit her down and discover what she intends to eat. I’d try and discourage a 12 year old from being vegan - its a lot harder to get the calcium and such that a kid needs. I’d encourage fish. She might have a very different idea of what vegetarian means than we do. I’d encourage a gradual move to vegetarian - maybe start by giving up beef and pork. Its hard to go cold turkey. Encourage means encourage, not force.
Canned or packaged albacore tuna in water contains between 0.5 and 2.5 grams of fat per serving (2.0-3.0 oz, ~90 to 120 calories), with no saturated fats or trans-isomer fatty acids. (I’m looking specifically at Starkist, but this should apply to other brands as well.) This includes a high content of essential fatty acids, i.e. those that cannot by synthesized by the human body.
I have to be the voice of dissension here and argue that a purely vegetarian (and especially vegan) diet is simply not generally healthy for children or adolescents. Children need the array of complete protein sources (those containing all essential amino acids), essential fatty acids, and a moderate amount of cholesterols (found almost exclusively in meat products). While most of these can be found in a varied diet of vegetable matter, it requires far more attention and discipline to maintain a moderately balanced diet than does one containing a moderate amount of lean animal protein (fish, lean poultry), and these are critical to healthy development. Most (American) vegetarian diets contain too little complete proteins and too much simple carbohydrates and trans-fatty acids (although the same can be said about American diets in general save for the addition of saturated animal product fats). Cultural vegetarian diets like those referenced by anu-la1979 are generally more balanced by virtue of being more diverse, but they generally include some kind of animal products I don’t know of a single cultural vegetarian diet that would qualify as being even close to veganism, which argues epistemologically against the health value of such diets.
There are also micronutrient (primarily vitamins and mineral) supplementation to consider, but frankly, these are as much of a problem for even most meat-centric Western diets as they are for vegetarian ones. Iron is of minimal concern, as it is one of the few minerals that seems to be absorbed just as well as a supplement as it does from natural sources. Calcium is more critical, although some research indicates that vegetable sources of calcium are actually more healthful and readily absorbed than calcium from dairy sources. Potassium, niacin, et cetera are important but can be obtained from eating a very modest variety of raw fruits.
As an adult, a balanced vegetarian or quasi-vegetarian diet is unquestionably more healthy than the standard Western diet of processed carbohydrate-heavy foods and saturated animal-based fats, but “balanced” means obtaining at least a minimum of complete proteins, which generally means either a fairly bulky and high (complex) carbohydrate diet of legumes and other complete protein sources, supplementation with protein extract (whey, soy, egg white, casein, hemp), or actual meat products. A lean meat/low fat dairy or dairy substitute diet with a large amount of low density raw or moderately cooked (steamed or roasted vegetables) and plenty of dietary fiber is almost universally accepted as the healthiest and most balanced diet for preventing chronic illness and weight gain.
If the o.p.'s child is determined to eat a vegetarian diet for ethical reasons, the best thing to do is to have her educate herself on nutrition and set out a prescribed diet to be followed including adequate supplementation. Consultation with a licensed nutritionist knowledgeable about pediatric nutrition is highly recommended. (No, your school nurse or pediatrician is not an expert on developmental nutrition.) Eating a diet of Twinkies, soda, and white bread is not an acceptable “vegetarian” diet and will likely lead to health consequences, later if not sooner.
In college I had a friend who was a lifelong vegetarian. His parents raised him that way and he’d never eaten meat. I don’t know what his parents fed him when he was growing up but he was completely healthy as far as anyone could tell. So I’m sure it can be done if you stay on top of it and have your daughter’s full cooperation.
Combining legumes+grains DOES result in a complete array of amino acids! While a confirmed eater of meat myself, I am aware that meat is not required for human health. And the body will happily make cholesterol if there is none in the diet.
The important thing, as you noted, is complete protein - which is why ethnic cuisines are a good place to start. The traditional sorts of foods like red beans and rice, chickpeas and couscous, soybeans/tofu and rice, peanuts and millet/sorghum (that’s a common pairing in Africa), lentils and rice, and so forth are complete proteins. These sorts of pairings appear over and over all over the world.
As you point out, most American diets are crap - it’s not because they’re vegetarian there’s a problem, it’s because nutrition isn’t properly taught anywhere in our society.
Jains are vegan - but then, in traditional India there’s enough contamination of food sources that insect parts and rodent droppings that make it into their food supplies the essential B12 that you can get only from animal sources. That, and the Jains have some notions others consider odd, like holy people deliberating starving themselves to death so maybe they aren’t the best example. Nonetheless, Jainism and its vegan practices have been around awhile.
There is no natural source of B12 other than animal products, but the occasional egg will suffice. Even so, I too recommended against veganism as it is harder to eat properly. Regular vegetarianism is a fine place to start.
Good god, is that really necessary? You realize that billions of people have manage to eat and still eat without needing professional services? Yes, she needs to educate herself, but seriously, hiring a professional and getting a “prescribed” diet?
One thing that hasn’t been mentioned, though, is that a vegetarian diet can be too low fat. It’s unlikely in some ways, but without meat in the diet there’s a lot less fat in the diet and active children need fat both for proper development (including the nervous system) and for the calories they need for growth and energy. Of course, if there’s fried food in the diet probably not a worry, but watch for extremes.