Some of us use other parts of our anatomy for writing. 
Unsurprisingly news.com.au has picked up this story & run with it. Pretty much copying word-for-word from the money.co.uk story.
Is it strange if I read your username as Colon Phone?
At least he only went on a shopping spree. 
Sure enough, it turns out the story was a hoax designed to attract web traffic: Linkbait at any Cost? | Search Marketing | Atomik Soapbox