13 years ago today....

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

13 years ago today…

13 years ago today, I gave birth to you. And now you are a teenager, but you are still so young. I was only one year older when I got pregnant, those many years ago.

We were surrounded in love when I was laboring to bring you into this world. I made sure of that. My mom, your grandmother, was there holding one of my hands, and the adoptive mother I picked out for you was holding the other. The adoptive father was busy watching you come in to this world. While he is considered one of the ‘manliest of men,’ and he may tell this story differently, he had a hard time remaining on his feet when you made your grand entrance into the waiting arms of the doctor.

“A tallywhacker!! I see a tallywhacker!!”

He had been hoping for a boy. He would have loved a daughter just as much, but a son was special.

After the nurse examined you, she bundled you up and prepared to hand you to me, but I wanted your adoptive father to hold you first. He was so scared. Scared of the helplessness of the small child that had just been placed in his arms. Scared that I would change my mind. Scared that he would have to leave the hospital without you.

I had chosen these people and I knew in my heart that they would raise you well. I made the decision and your mother and father made it easy for me to live with that decision.

The day came to leave the hospital. I had spent the morning with you. I talked to you and explained as best I could what would be happening in the next few hours. I cuddled with you and cried over your simple perfection.

Your parents had spent portions of the previous couple days with you in the nursery, getting a course in newborn care from the nurses, though they had long been prepared for your arrival.

Your mother came into my room with the outfit you were to wear home, and I gave you to her and watched from the back of the room as she bathed you. She was a natural. She talked to you in a low soft voice, and moved with grace and patience. Even when, as she was preparing to put your diaper on, you baptized her with a golden shower, she just laughed, and reached for the washcloth again.

These people, your parents, are miraculous. Instead of making time for me in your life, they made my family an extension of their own. Seemlessly. Our extended family situation seems normal, almost boring, by comparison with some families whose lives haven’t been blessed with adoption.

I did not give you to them.
I chose them and gave them to you, as the only true gift I had to give.
You are the gift in my life, and my love for you is unending. The last 13 years have been wonderful, and I am looking forward to the next 13, and the 13 after that.

2

I just wanted to say what a beautiful thread. You gave them a wonderful gift. Its great to hear that things are working out well for each of you.

Now please excuse me while I wipe the tears away.

3

That was a beautiful post, thank you and good luck for the future. I hope all goes as well as it has.

4

Holy cow. I’m an adopted child, and you brought tears to my eyes. sniffle

5

I’ve enclosed a copy of this letter in his birthday card. He’s at the age where I expect him to start asking questions, though I’ve been prepared for a couple of years now. We’ve had our ups and downs like most families, but we’ve worked through them. Every aspect and detail of his adoption has been put forth to him over the years, so that there wouldn’t be any bad surprises or shocks. He answers all his friends questions with accuracy and detail when they question him about me and our situation. He doesn’t bragg, but neither does he view his adoption as shameful. It’s just normal for him, which is what we were aiming for.

I posted a copy here because it seems that many of the adoption stories you hear are sad ones for either the child or the birthparents. The bad ones always seem to make headlines, or make it into print more often than the good ones.

6

That truly was a beautiful letter. You are a great person. Now I have to wipe my eyes.

7

Please tell me you don’t still refer to it as a ‘tallywhacker’ :smiley:

8

Not really anymore. Usually the only time is when we’re telling our story to someone, though often I will leave that part out, as it embarrasses him dreadfully. :o

Our get together Thursday night was fun… though he’s got this “Ashton Kutcher-shaggy haired-trucker cap” thing goin’ on that I’m not real wild about. Basically because it makes him look older than he is. Otherwise, he’s your typical kid. Wants to listen to music that his parents don’t think is appropriate, which is hysterically funny because it’s the music I listen to, and he knows it. Girls are always calling the house and giggling into the phone when they ask to speak to him. Plays hockey, hates math, loves shop class, and likes to sleep late on the weekends.

Though he looks like his birthfather, he acts just like my brothers, which is sometimes a good thing, and sometimes not. :smiley: