Weirdly enough, one of those stories is actually true. Some Hollywood guy got a thread deleted.
Personally, I’m thankful there have been no more parties. Too many of us ended up with Cecil’s love children after that. Little Cécile is exhausting.
Five years you say? Cite? 
Things that have changed:
Barack Obama was re-elected; he handily beat Newt Gingrich.
Kim Kardashian and Kanye West-- also known as “Kandash”-- married and had a baby they named Northwest.
Charlie Sheen was fired from “Two and a Half Men;” he was replaced by Mila Kunis.
Price William married long-time girlfriend Kate Middleton. They had a baby name Roscoe.
Osama bin Laden was killed by a Navy Seal team led by Hillary Clinton.
Paula Deen was arrested for calling President Obama the n-word.
Pope Francis beat Pope Benedict in a stunning upset, the first time a pope’s lost re-election in 900 years.
Gay marriage is now the law of the land.
London hosted the Summer Olympics, where swimmer Kim Jung Un wins the hearts of the world.
Penn State permanently shut its doors after it’s revealed the football team was showering with little boys.
Liza Minelli traveled to Israel to negotiate a ceasefire between Israel and the Palestinians; she’s gunned down by rogue street fighter named George Zimmerman.
A Russian punk band named Pussy Riot shocked and dazzled at the Putin inaugural.
In honor of the American League Championship Series, people began pouring ice water on themselves and posting it to Facebook.
Performance artist Shia LeBeouf is charged with Robin Williams’ murder.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie tied the knot in a quiet ceremony in Shiloh, NY.
And last but not least, First Lady Michelle Obama wowed the world with her toned biceps.
Things that haven’t changed:
Saturday Night Live is still the highest rated television show in the United States.
Queen Elizabeth Marie Calendar II is still monarch of England.
Evander Holyfield remains the undefeated heavyweight champion of the world.
The Chicago Cubs are still the only MLB team to have never won the World Series.
Joe Biden is still kicking ass and taking names in Washington.
America’s sweetheart Sarah Michelle Gellar–also known as SaMiGe-- is still married to Freddy Prinze Jr-- also known as FrPrJu.
Dinosaurs still remain a thing of the past.
Cancer still remains a thing.
Freddy Mercury is still dead.
Kurt Busch is still dating assassins.
Yes, I remember seeing your name in the now hidden thread “Cecil you bastard, where’s my God Damned Child Support” that popped up about 9 months after the party. Cecil’s virility became legendary and was a big theme here for a time. 50 children that weekend alone - amazing. I imagine like all of his children little Cécile is remarkably precocious, albeit born with horns and a tail? Were you able to have those removed like some of the others or do you let her own it?
Well… first the Earth cooled
Then the dinosaurs came.
But they go too fat and heavy, died and became oil.
Then the Arabs came and they bought Mercedes!
Cécile got the wings in lieu of the horns and when she hit 12 months, they started becoming functional. The other day I caught her on top of the dresser I’ve had to move in front of the window to keep her inside. This on top of all the usual toddler learning and tantrums. Admittedly, I’m trying to teach her to say “cite?” whenever someone tells her she has to do something. I’ll regret it, but I’ll also laugh every day. If I survive her toddlerhood that is!
Not a damn thing has changed around my neck of the woods.
Oh, wait. Its gotten worse.
The wings usually come with fire breathing (ask me how I know!). Not good on the drapes but a hit at family bbq’s! God how I envy your daughter when she gets older - who needs to mess with rush hour traffic when you’ve got pandemonium and mayhem working for you?
Sounds like you have a good doper in the works - teach her strong values lest she truly turn to the dark path and becomes a moderator!
Clearly I picked the wrong thread to stop sniffing glue.
One other note of sympathy - non potty trained flying toddlers is hell on the furniture. Don’t let her in the kitchen while you’re fixing dinner.
I’m a much more active poster than I was the last time you were here, back before I registered.
It turns out not all airplanes that crash in NY are fatalities.