I was a kid in the 60s and 70s. We didn’t have a bedtime until all of a sudden, when I was around 10 (I’m the eldest of four), my dad imposed a 9:30 bedtime on school nights. We hated it on Sunday nights because we wanted to watch All in the Family. My dad didn’t think it was appropriate for us. We’d beg and usually get to watch it. But we kids were all late sleepers in the summer and on weekends. We didn’t get up until 10 am.
I think my dad heard some of the guys talking at work about their kids’ bedtimes, so he decided he’d give it a try.
I remember as a very young kid-- like 6 or 7-- not being allowed to stay up to watch “The Wonderful World of Disney” which I believe aired at 7pm on Sunday night. So yeah, I had a super early bedtime…I wasn’t even allowed to stay up late enough to watch a show aimed at kids!
It’s possible that, since it was Sunday, my parents made me take an extra early bedtime to prepare for the school week ahead.
Different kids certainly need different amounts of sleep. And the same kid has different needs at different ages too.
I’m sure a bunch of our parents had a pretty good handle on what amount of sleep led to happy tractable kids tomorrow and what amount led to cranky little hellions.
Sure, some parents embraced doctrine for doctrine’s sake, or ignored kids’ real needs for their own convenience. But an awful lot of parents had (have?) a pretty pragmatic and sincere approach to raising their sprogs.
It’s less about “inconveniencing” parents than allowing space to perform the basic needs of life.
Parenting young children involves some very long hours. They need to be attended from the time they wake from the time they go to bed. This leaves no time for basic things like taking a shower, paying bills, or yes, having one or two hours of unoccupied time like normal humans do.
Since kids need about 9 hours of sleep, a 9PM-6AM sleep schedule meets this need. Put the kids down, and do everything you can’t do when they’re awake.
If a kid isn’t a good sleeper, then this sucks for everyone, but the answer can’t be letting the kids stay up doing iPad or watching TV until midnight, because that’s not healthy for anybody.
9PM is fine for kids 14 and under. Going earlier than that is pushing it, unless you’re blessed with a really deep and long sleeper, in which case you should embrace that 8PM bedtime with all your heart.
Younger kids need a lot more sleep than adults. My five year old is apparently supposed to have 10-13 hours per night, which is nearly impossible with his schedule.
I don’t remember my bed time at that age, but I remember having a pretty late bedtime in junior high and high school. My parents also didn’t care how late I stayed up as long as I was in my bedroom. But they also kept me awake with a blaring TV in the living room, usually watching violent or high drama stuff that made it impossible for me to fall asleep.
As for my son, he gets his nighttime story around 7:30-8pm whenever possible, and is free to play in his room until he’s ready to be tucked in. We make sure he’s asleep before we sleep.
As it is, my husband and I are lucky if we get an hour together alone before bed. The nights we get it all done by 7:30pm are like winning the lottery.
Our bedtime was a slowly moving target: 8:30 in early elementary, 9 by fourth grade, then 9:30 and by high school 10. Yeah, combo of parents wanting some time to themselves and wanting to make sure growing children were getting enough sleep.
It was a huge area of combat and dissent. My parents were diurnal creatures, popping out of bed at 7:30 on weekends and expecting us to come to breakfast shortly thereafter. I was totally nocturnal by nature and my parents couldn’t comprehend. They once told me that when I was four, and they were tired of the bedtime battles, they got the brilliant idea of just letting me stay up until I was sleepy and would go to bed on my own. At 2 AM, I showed no sign of winding down.
I can recall storming out of the house one Saturday at 9 AM, when my mom came into my room, flung the covers off me, and started running the vacuum cleaner. Took my bedsheets, got into my car, drove down a deserted dirt road, and slept in the car for the next few hours.
I remember reading a kids health newsletter in the sixties that stated that children needed eleven hours of sleep. I don’t know if it was an issue of Weekly Reader or not. I also don’t know if different authorities were telling parents 10 hours and telling kids 11 hours.
My parents made us go to bed at 8:00 on weekdays. I think they were influenced by talk on TV and newspapers at the time, about how important it was for kids to get enough sleep. I remember Dr. Joyce Brothers appearing on Art Linkletter’s show to discuss this with him.
Although they let us stay up later on weekends, they stuck to the 8:00 bedtime in the summer. I hated lying awake in bed hearing other kids outside playing.
My brother and I had bedtimes year ‘round, although I’m pretty sure in the summer we were allowed to stay up later. The earliest bedtime I can remember was 8pm for me, and 8:30 for him (he was older). Every year for a few years, bedtime moved back half an hour at the start of the new school year, but by the time we were in high school, we could go to bed any time we wanted as long as it was before 11:30pm. The only exception was if we were working on homework, then we could stay up as late as midnight.
I don’t remember fighting or complaining about bedtimes. My recollection is that I was usually tired enough by my bedtime that I was ready for bed irrespective of what the clock said.
I’m glad I grew up in a country where even children wouldn’t dream of eating dinner before 8pm. Then the obligatory after dinner digestive walk. Even as a five year old my bedtime was 10pm.
Afternoon nap was 3pm to 5pm, followed by a pretty substantial tea (either sandwiches or Indian style snacks).
We both worked full time. So we had the babysitter put the kids down for an afternoon nap, and then they stayed up after dinner and went to bed shortly before we did. We used to take them to the playground after supper, even though it was dark out.
When they were older, i think we kinda let them pick their bedtime. We read bedtime stories, so it’s not as if we just ignored them until they went to sleep on their own, but i don’t recall ever having a strict bedtime.
I don’t remember ever talking naps after kindergarten. My mother often did, at least when I was in my teens (and, in retrospect, when she was probably going through menopause); but she always stayed up long after I went to bed.
It was 90+ degrees at that time of the for most of the year, and air conditioning was rare In those days. For 2-3 months it might be 100+ most days. It wasn’t really safe to play outside.
Taking a nap was de rigueur even for many adults in physical jobs without benefit of AC.
I used to have a “play nap”, where i was expected to play quietly. That included being allowed to listen to records on my father’s fancy record machine. I realized later that that was my mother’s nap time. She had 4 kids under 6, and she put the younger kids down for naps, napped herself, and gave me stuff to play with in the living room. In addition to records, i played with Cuisenaire rods (so pretty) and paper and pencils.
I think multiple TV’s and individual rooms in particular made a difference. When I was a little kid in the mid-late 1960s we had an absurdly early bedtime - 7 or 8, even in the summer ( I don’t remember what time Disney was on, but I do remember we couldn’t watch the whole show.) There wasn’t anything we could do in our room (singular) other than trying to go to sleep , since all three of us girls shared one.( My brother had his own) My kids on the other hand - I might have wanted them in their bedrooms by 7 or 8 but they could watch TV or read or play quietly as long as I didn’t have trouble getting theem out of bed in the morning.
Pretty much the same for me. I don’t remember my mother saying “okay, bed time”, although she may have. But usually, after whatever western series or Ed Sullivan was done on TV, so was I.
I know what you mean about bedtimes. I remember being old enough to be in school, and yet having a bedtime of 7:30 - but there must have been a lot of exceptions - I could watch The Wizard of Oz when that was on and I certainly stayed up later on Friday and Saturday. Every once in a while, my father would take me out in the evening when he went to an American Legion meeting, so I’d get home quite late (almost 10!) and maybe see a minute or two of Ironside. Sometimes my folks did have company after my brother and I were in bed, other times, I assume they enjoyed us being out of their hair…
