Almost every day at school, I encounter girls who walk into the bathroom while chatting on cell phones. They don’t let something like needing to use the facilities stop them from continuing their delightful chat, oh no! They march right into a stall to tinkle while they talk.
Why? You can’t tell me these are all life-or-death discussions that absolutely must continue while one person answers the call of nature (call waiting?).
Are you trying to convince a friend not to jump off a bridge?
Have you unluckily, just this moment, as you rush off to pee, broken through hold-music hell to talk to a real live voice from your credit card company?
Is your mom on the line giving you her deathbed confession?
Maybe that’s your brother using his one phone call from the county lockup?
No, wait, I know! You’re using your video-phone steup so your friend can walk you through a tampon change, step by step!
Whatever your conversation is really about, damn it, can’t it wait until after you’ve pissed and pooped? You’re gross! Who enjoys hearing a friend strain and fart on the other end of the line? Go flush your damn selves.
Taking a piss while talking on the cell is nothing. The other day I walked into the bathroom and into a stall and the chick next to me was taking a farty crap and talking to her husband. She ended the conversation on a particularly flatulent note and with an “I love you.” I kept pissing and thinking
This happens where I work - people can’t use cell phones in the clinic areas, so they step out into the halls to talk (which isn’t so bad) or decide that the public restrooms would make great phonebooths… and hey, while they’re at it, might as well relieve themselves too. :rolleyes:
I try to time a flush for a particularly ‘good’ moment of conversation - about to say a time/place to meet, for instance.
Reason #95,627 why I hate living in a dorm
The door to the bathroom is apparently mislabeled “phone booth”. Or so it would seem. I hate this generation of kids who can’t be away from their goddamn cell phones for the 3 minutes it takes to use the can.
It is pretty gross. Also, sometimes when you are in the bathroom don’t you need two hands? Well, maybe not need but it makes certain things easier. And how the hell would you wash your hands?
Ick, I am nauseating myself.
Is this mostly a female phenomenon? Only once do I ever recall being in a restroom while a guy in one of the stalls was having a business conversation while farting and shitting loudly. Imagine how this must have sounded to the person at the other end of the call: “Yeah, Bob, what are the latest sales figures? PPTTTTHHHH! Plop! Plop! PTTHH!”
Classic! Just classic! A way over the top TMI visual of this is now in my head. :eek:
Back in the day, waaaaaaay before cell phones pervaded the landscape, I knew someone who had a landline in her bathroom. A precious little light blue slimline princess phone right next to the toilet. Occasionally I would use her bathroom just so I could call up somebody and say “Guess where I am right now?” It’s good to share with friends.
When this happens, you should loudly and animatedly pretend you are having the shit of your life, with grunting, cursing, gasping for breath, and exclamations of relief.
Silly. How do you think she’s paying for her education? Log on to www.pissingcollegecoeds.com and you can see her using her web cam phone in the loo! £2.99 for a 3 day trial membership. Major credit cards accepted.
Totally. A guy I used to work with would ALWAYS do this. He would be in the stall taking some massive growler while he’s talking to people he works with and about work projects!!!
:eek:
what on earth could he possibly be thinking?
wait, don’t answer that.
You know, it’s hard to believe that it wasn’t all that long ago that the ickiness of talking to someone on the phone while in the bathroom was a major plot point on an episode of Ellen, back when it was These Friends of Mine or something like that.
You knew the woman who owned my house?? I swear, the guest bathroom in this house had a blue princess phone sitting on the back of the toilet. No, it’s not there any longer. I think of the bathroom as a place to escape the phone!
