I am in so much…fucking…pain.
This has been two years now of living with DAILY, and I’m not exaggerating here…DAILY back pain. I have two herniated discs in the lumbar region which cause my left leg to periodically go numb. When I overcompensate to take pressure off the left side, it causes shooting, burning pain between my shoulderblades and up my neck which makes my RIGHT ARM go numb.
Keep in mind…I’m only twenty eight. I walk around like a fuckin’ cadaver, creaking and cracking, groaning in agony when I get out of bed. I can’t go on road trips, I can’t carry bags, I can’t sleep in any bed except my own, I can’t sit in a recliner, I can’t FUCKING DO A FUCKING THING…
Would surgery help me? I can almost guarantee it. What do the doctors say?
“Lets not do anything drastic!”
OK, cocksmack! Let’s not! Instead, let’s run the whole fucking spinal guantlet leaving me a broken, crippled sobbing mess of humanity –
in the past two years I have:
missed a minimum of two weeks of work
had an MRI
gone through two series of physical therapy
had to stop weight training, and severely cut back my swim workout schedule so as not to OVERKICK MYSELF.
been stretched on a traction table which was like a bizarre chiropractic/bdsm event
had steroid injections DIRECTLY into my spine…decidedly the most painful fifteen minutes of my miserable life – after which I was informed that STUDENT was performing the procedure so “it probably hurt more than it should have”.
been prescribed the Brett Favre cocktail of vicadin, valium and celbrex, and two new pills that I got yesterday which don’t really do anything for my back but knock me out for about 10 hours.
On top of it, I’ve been given an antidepressant to increase my pain threshold, turning me, basically, into a Universal Soldier.
Chiropractic? Napropathy? Ostepathy? Massage? Could we try any of those? Oh hell no…the insurance company says those aren’t necessary. AREN’T NECESSARY. Perhaps the insurance compay would like to walk a mile in my spine. I’d be happy to give it to them, and perform the implant rectally.
So, in conclusion, the doctor is basically saying, “life sucks, your back is for shit…here’s some happy pills to make it go away.”
Not to mention the fact that every time I go see someone I’m forced to EXPLAIN THE WHOLE FUCKING STORY to them EVERY SINGLE TIME. Isn’t this what we have files for, you insufferable assmunch?
Next step? Who the hell knows? All I know is, my left foot is tingling as I type this, my neck is in severe disrepair, my shoulders are aching and I’m ready to throw myself out of this fucking ninth floor window and just spare everyone the trouble.
have a nice day.