A horse in a bespoke suit.

For the 2016 Cheltenham Festival. It took 59 feet of genuine Harris tweed.

Now have I seen everything?

The story.

The video.

Once, when I was a child – many years ago now – I saw a film called “The Horse in the Gray Flannel Suit”. It featured Dean Jones, a young Kurt Russell, and a dapple grey horse which at no point in the proceedings wore a suit, gray flannel or otherwise. I was, as you can imagine, deeply disappointed.

I cannot express my delight at finally, after 40 or more years, seeing a horse in a suit.

I wonder how they got the horse to cooperate, they aren’t exactly used to wearing clothing. A blanket maybe, but not a suit jacket.

Maybe he’s just a particularly mellow horse?

This story says:

BTW, just the fabric for this retails for about $2,000.

If it’s possible to persuade a horse to wear armour (which it is) I’d image a bit of tweed would be a doddle.

I think, also, that racehorses in particular are probably fairly used to people fussing around them and getting them to do unlikely things.

Who has read James White’s story Custom Fitting?


I just learned “bespoke” and “off the peg” from Kingsman. Now “a doddle”. Life is a rich tapestry. Sometimes with a horse inside it.

The list of things I have seen now contains everything.

You’re welcome?

Well, yeah; do you have any idea how hard it is for him to buy off the rack?

Well, yes, I thought about that … but since I hardly ever get to use a fun word like ‘bespoke’ in daily life, I couldn’t resist adding it.

I haven’t, for one. And, sadly, I can’t read it from a link to a file on your hard drive. Any chance you could give us a rough idea of what it’s about?

I was at an impressionable age, and I was promised a horse in a suit. By Disney. If anyone could give me a horse in a suit, you’d think it would be Disney. But no.

I was surprised myself at how much it still rankled.

You’re welcome.

Personally I have a very hard time forgiving Disney for killing Old Yeller and Bambi’s mom. And they have the nerve to call Disneyland ‘the happiest place on Earth’ and expect us to believe it. Pfft. Doesn’t surprise me a bit not delivering a horsesuit.

It’s a first contact story. A tailor in London, England, is approaced by a government agent who explains a garment is needed for an ambassador. Turns out the ambassador is an alien who greatly resembles a centaur from Greek mythology. Hewlitt, the tailor, in rather surprised when the ambassador is brought in, but with great British aplomb starts taking measurements.

He’s been asked to make a horse blanket type garment but then this very proper man finds out the ambassador, the Lord Screnagle of Dutha, will be presenting his credentials to Her Majesty at the court of St. James. He blows his top to the agent. “And for this you want me to make a horse blanket?” Hewlitt insists on making proper formal wear, and the ambassador backs him up.

You really need to read it, it is online. The following link is to an anthology that includes the story, and the cover picture is from “Custom Fitting:” http://www.amazon.com/Stellar-No-Science-Fiction-Stories/dp/0345245849/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1458002883&sr=8-1&keywords=Stellar+2+Del+Rey

Try googling custom fitting James White When I do it the story is the fifth hit down. It says PDF before it.

And not just a suit, but an entire wardrobe!

Oh yes! Hewlitt was chosen as the tailor because all his material was natural fiber, no plastics or manufactured materials, which the ambassador’s skin would react badly to.

No, but if that’s the Sector General James White, I’ll find it

It is the same James White. If and when you find and read the story, let me know what you think of it. It’s one of my top ten favorite short stories in science fiction.

I wonder if he keeps sugar cubes in his pockets.

Well, THIS horse’s ass has never looked as good in a suit; who’s his tail-or again?

(That cap is to die for!)