This is a page from my blog from last year. Ogre wrote a post in IMHO
regarding the boards, so I decided to share my story in an attempt to amuse. If I fail - well, he feels the quality’s gone down in the last five years…
The cutie pie that I’m dating can rest assured that I truly care about him. The reason that he can feel totally confident in my genuine feeling is that I spent the entire morning with him in the Atlanta area one Saturday despite his outfit.
You may wonder, “what in the world could the man have worn to make Jali say all this on the internet.” Well I’ll share: He wore a lime green “Nappy” track suit… with emerald green and black racing stripes… with the name “Nappy” in bold white letters on the back. (I made a serious effort to research the “Nappy” apparel company, but was unable to find an active link.
I really wanted to share the look with you guys so that you’d really understand how much I care for this man. Remember, it was lime green. With emerald green and black racing stripes. Nappy.) Based on the one example of the design of the “Nappy” people that I’ve seen, I assume that the company is out of business. They really need to be.
The plan in the morning was to run out briefly to make it to an early morning doctor’s appointment. “A” didn’t really care what the doctor thought about his outfit. “A” should have cared.
When he got in the car, I sort of shielded my eyes from the glare of the lime green. He gave me *that look * and I didn’t say a word. Not one word until we were on the road.
Now let me explain, “A” is a beautiful man. Just beautiful… but remember the saying, ‘beauty is as beauty does’? Well “A” decided to do the Nappy lime green track suit that morning.
I offered to play a road game to make things fun. “Let’s name all the green things we see while we’re traveling.” My suggestion wasn’t even given a response.
“Oooh… there’s your car!” Yup, a guy was driving a shiny lime green convertable so I sped up a bit to get a good look. “A” refused to acknowledge the car at all.
“Green trees, green grass, green trash can…” I was on a roll playing my game. “A” wasn’t amused, but I find my entertainment where I can.
We pulled into the parking garage of the medical complex, and I decided to wait outside and read for a while. “Don’t worry baby, I’ll see you as soon as you come out of the building.” “A” didn’t get the joke.
After the appointment the original plan was to fly back home, change into more groovy gear and find some fun or trouble to get into. My stomach wasn’t having it.
I went into whiney mode. “I’m hungry, I’m hot… I have a headache.” I accompanied this much repeated refrain with my patented ‘pitiful Jali’ look. After about my 12th or 13th sigh and his obvious annoyance at my whining, “A” finally relented and agreed to feed me.
Did we stop at the closest fast food spot where we could whizz through the drive-thru?
Ha-Ha.
I sped onto the highway with a goal in mind: The Famous Pancake House in Stone Mountain.
The restaurant was crowded (as always). TFPH is my favorite breakfast spot in the Metro area and I was excited to share the experience with the dude of my dreams.
The dude of my dreams still wore the lime green Nappy suit with emerald and black racing stripes. He remembered his outfit as we walked past the people sitting outside the restaurant. (see, this is why I need a camera phone - the look on his face when the realization set in was amazing).
I grabbed his hand to show solidarity, but turned away so that he wouldn’t see me giggling.
The hostess sat us near the middle of the room. “A” was cool - well I suppose as cool as one can be while wearing a lime green Nappy track suit with emerald and black racing stripes and with every eye in the restaurant watching his every move.
We ordered, the food was delicious, the conversation great and the time had come to make our grand exit.
“When I get home, I’m going to put this suit in a bag and pee on it”. (Yeah, yeah, but you still have it on now.)
I proudly held his hand again as we weaved through the crowded room of staring people. “He’s MY man!” (yeah, that was a paraphrased quote by “Squeek” from The Color Purple).
As we drove home I notice the engine temp gauge was slowly edging towards dangerous. “A” wisely suggested that we stop at the auto parts store for fluids. (Ooh goodie, another adventure.)
I make the most of each and every shopping opportunity and was cruising the aisles for things I might need, and I suppose that “A” got tired of waiting in the hot car. I looked up and he was standing next to me, sweating like crazy in his lime green track suit with emerald and black racing stripes.
I put down the thing-a-ma-bob that I had been examining and followed “A” to the register. The guy that helped us happened to mention that it was his B-day and that he couldn’t wait until he got off.
“Um sir… may I ask you a serious question?”
“Sure”, he was a polite young man.
“If someone gave you a lime green Nappy track suit with emerald and black racing stripes as a gift for your birthday, would you wear it?”
Post script - “A” is finally speaking to me again. Would I do it all over knowing what I know now? Hells yeah! That was the best laugh I’d had for days and the other customers and clerks enjoyed it too.
If anyone can find a photo of a “Nappy” track suit, please send me a link!!