I’m not hiding. Nope, I’m not hiding at all.
I’m also not sticking my fingers in my ears and humming.
Saturday morning cartoons and Bullwinkle. Also Mr. Peabody and Sherman. Yep, that’s a great hijack. That’s what we should be talking about. Not that I’m trying to divert attention from any other subject. I wouldn’t do that.
Welcome back, Shibb. It’s time you resumed pulling you own weight around here. Especially with Rue vacatiating.
A Pig Story
One time, a long time ago, not like during the last Ice Age or anything, but a while ago, we, the Little Woman and I went to the Indiana State Fair. We had elephant ears and Lemon Shake Ups and marveled at all the new overalls. We also wound up in the Pig Barn just before the big pig Judging. That’s when they get the pigs from their holding pens to the judging ring. They use this little stick and a board. Only sometimes the pigs don’t co-operate. They just lumber off on their own. And State Fair pigs are BIG PIGS.
Well, this one pig got away from its swineherd and made a break for freedom. Only we, the Little Woman and I, were between it and the door. So a half-ton of bacon on the hoof was bearing down on us. So what does the little Woman do? She HIDES BEHIND ME!
But before we were trampled by an excaping pig, the Hoosier Swineherd caught up to it and slapped the board in front of it and whacked it with the stick and it went off to be judged. I hoped it lost.
-Rue. (not really back, just here for a minnit)
My favorite cartoons were the ones that sometimes showed up instead of Tom and Jerry. They were the ones that showed cars and houses of the future. I loved those. It was like getting a special treat when they came on!
I remember there was one car that was really long and they had mom and dad up front in luxury and the kids in back with appropriate kid stuff and the ‘mother in law’ seat way back that looked all menacing.
In the houses they had funky stuff too like a convertible chair that eventually was an electric chair when they got to the dreaded ‘mother in law’ again.
There were all kinds of odd gadgets too and I remember one where the ‘little lady’ made dinner in a pressure cooker and exploded the whole house.
Those are probably in a vault somewhere labeled ‘non PC … hazardous to children’s health’
Speaking of people disappearing, you’ll note that after I declared my undying love for Wintermute (and Legos) she disappeared. Just like a woman to promise the best Lego kit of all time and not follow through.
Kalessa, wife to be of my friend Exgineer, here’s the brain scrubbing recipe that works best:
Slam your head into a wall until you’re dizzy.
Drink at [I[least* 1.5 bottles of tequila.
Slam your head some more (the tequila will help dull the pain).
Obtain an IV and hook it up to a keg. Feed yourself beer for the next three days, only stopping to drink more tequila and bang your head some more.
After the hangover wears off, you’ll not only forget my nipples, but you’ll likely forget your name, that you’re engaged to Ex, and how to breathe.
No need to thank me, I’m just a public servant.
Oh, ye of little faith! I went off to buy the Legos, didn’t I? Really, Welby, have a little patience!
The word “patience” does not belong in any sentence, paragraph, or book that mentions “Lego” unless you’re explaining that the two terms are mutually incompatible.
Even so, now that I know you were really out there looking out for my best interests, consider me apologetic. Consider Rue on vacation. Consider Exgineer to be a dope. Consider the following:
You have a system that operates at 4500 baud (signals per second), and uses 3 bits per signal event. What is the data rate of the system?
I’ll see what I can do, but I am vacationing, too. Which means that I a) only have a dial up connection about 85% of the time and b) I get surly looks from Mrs. ShibbOleth when I spend too much time on the computer, even for important stuff like this.
Help Mr. Wizard!
So yesterday, the little Woman and I went to see a movie. We dropped the boys at Mom’s so Child Services wouldn’t have a beef with us (this time). We went to the second run theater because we were busy while X-Men II was in the regular, good theaters. So there we are in the second run theater about to watch X-Men II and it starts to fill up. With chatty people. We already moved once from our seats when Chatty People plunked down right behind us. So now we were in another aisle. Way at the end. The rest of the aisle was full of Dad (at least, I assume he was the dad), some little kid, a slightly larger kid and then a still slightly larger kid than me and then the Little Woman.
Well, the third kid, the one next to me, had one of those laser pointers. He was beaming it on the back of the seat in front of him making his brother snicker. “Ha ha ha! A red dot on the seat in front of us!” Yeah, OK.
Then the kid squirms around in his seat, aiming the laser pointer at the screen. Hmmm… a kid with a laser pointer, in a dark room, aiming it at the movie screen… what could be his plan?
So I lean over to him and say “Don’t do that.”
You should have seen him jump! Like Stealth Boy could ever get caught! Ha!
I only use my Dad Psychic Powers for good. I swear.
-Rue. (wasting a story that could be next week’s MMP)
Why don’t they show cartoons at movies anymore? (Notice the subtle combining of two distinct hijack subjects, but wait, could there be more?)
I, personally, am not old enough to remember cartoons at movies, except for the rare Disney short in front of a Disney film (I remember one that played with The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes for example). However, I do know that most of the really great Bugs Bunny cartoons originally played at movie theaters. Now that previews/trailers are rarely any different than the TV ads, I’d swap one trailer and a couple of the despictable ads that play before the movie in order to watch a cartoon.
I’d especially like to see a cartoon about a pig at a fair who has a swinherd with sunburned nipples (because he or she was locked out of the house) carrying a riding whip and legos while fighting off the dreaded Day Toes monster. It could also have a tiger eating brownies and not planning a wedding.
So, how’d you like X-Men II, Rue? Or did the Chatty People spoil it? They were at the screening of The Hulk that I went to and I found them very distracting.
The only place I can remember seeing cartoons run in front of movies was the Drive-in when I was a very little girl. I don’t remember the cartoon or the movie, though.
Luckily, I’m not the kind to hold a grudge. But I am holding the Legos hostage until I get some of that good lovin’.
Ummm. You love me for my radiant beauty, right? Or my knowledge of obscure sexual practices. Or my ability to bake a damn fine cherry pie. Right? Right??
'Cuz if you love me based on my ability to answer that question, I’m…well, I was going to say f****d, but I guess I wouldn’t be, would I? Let’s just say I’d be SOL.
Me have hammer. Data rate be zero soon.
We took the Shibbletts to see Finding Nemo about a week ago. This being Florida and all, they were the only children in the theater. My wife and I were the only adults that didn’t qualify for the Seniors discount. Anyway, nice film, and Pixar seems to always have a short they show before the main feature. And we didn’t have to wing any of the older folks with popcorn, they were very good during the show, although they did chat alot beforehand.
Aaah the Drive-in. I always loved the foil wrapped cheeseburgers and big buckets of popcorn.
My grandfather joked that he picked out his plot in the cemetery so that he could watch movies at the local drive-in after he died. The jokes on him though as the theatre closed shortly after he died. I guess he’s busy being an ornament and raiding God’s fridge?
I really want to see that, was it any good?
We went to a lot of Disney films when I was a kid, for a couple reasons:
First, Mom monitored what we watched for sex and violence. In fact, for several years, we didn’t have a TV at all. I didn’t see a PG-rated movie until I was 11 or 12.
Second, I am the oldest of five girls, so there was always a toddler or a baby in the house, and, with no one to watch the wee ones, they had to come along to any outing. (Mom was always good about taking them out if they made a fuss. I don’t think she saw a movie from beginning to end from the mid-60’s to the 90’s. And by then she had grandchildren. She loves her VCR; it’s the only way she gets to see a movie, anymore.)
The point of all of that is that I think Disney used to run shorts before their films more than, say, one aimed at adults. (I kind of think they still do, but I haven’t seen one in years.)
Also, I saw a lot of bad Disney movies. (They were considered safe.) The 70’s were not their golden years, that’s for sure.
I’ve since been informed that I wasn’t bossy for mine. O’course, that could be because I was too busy fighting with INS at the time, since they said I could get married but then lost the paperwork so the week before my wedding, instead of being bossy and pissy with people, I was in Toronto trying to get the paperwork Emergency Filed And Expedited NOW. Got final permission 2 days before the wedding.
I didn’t care what the guys wore, as long as they looked nice (DogDad decided Tuxes Would Look Nice), I told the Fathers to please wear suits but only if they had one that fit and please don’t buy one Just For Us, Mothers could wear Nice Whatever Kind Of Dresses They Wanted (and the funny thing is, they didn’t coordinate ahead of time, but they both wore blue…and almost the same shade and everything.)
The reception was in my parents’ backyard (thanks mom & dad!) under a tent, my brother acted as lifeguard for the pool, we had no music / dancing because nobody was interested, and our Wedding Dinner was Mostaccioli, Salad, and Pizza buffet.
My only regret is that I should’ve just told my attendants that they could wear any dress they wanted, as long as they looked nice, instead of making them do the whole “Bridesmaid Dress” thing.
In retrospect I wish I’d done that. Oh, well.
(Sorry Exgineer, that it’s not more interesting, but as I keep telling my friends, I’m a Boring Married Person. This is as scintillating as it gets. Sad, isn’t it?)
Well, I fibbed a bit when I said I’d never planned a wedding–I’ve made a lot of decisions for when some lucky man figures out what a great catch I am (and I am a really great catch and I’m taking volunteers). I didn’t start “planning” my wedding until my 30’s–I know lots of women who started bride books while they were still in high school, but I have decided:
I’m in a wedding gown, white or off-white, with a sweetheart neckline. It will be more elegant than the “Princess Bride” types, but not to be confused with a cocktail dress. No veil, but I like the idea of a train.
Groom is in a tux. I am partial to dove grey mourning suits, but that may be too formal.
Bridsmaids pick their own dresses, to match my colors (probably shade of purple).
I’d love pansies in my bouquet, but I accept that they may be too delicate.
I’m walking down an aisle. Won’t be in a church, but it will be an aisle.
I don’t care if I’m over 40, it’s my first/only wedding and I’m the bride and I have been culturally program to want these thing and damn it, I do.
That’s what I wore at my wedding. I don’t remember why that instead of a standard black tux. We were married late morning with an afternoon reception. My wife’s dress was custom-made by a friend’s sister, as the friend’s wedding present. The groomsmen wore suits and the bridal party blue dresses; my wife selected blue for the bridesmaids because the two of them who could least afford to buy new dresses both had good blue dresses.
Everything was pretty casual, with the buffet at the reception planned by my wife and “catered” by friends who had to keep chasing her out of the kitchen at the VFW hall because she kept going back to check on how things were going. Not that she didn’t trust them, she’s just a worrier.
Okay, so it’s a dove grey mourning suit. I still need a groom (IRL–not to slight my SDMB fiance’, the elusive Exgineer) to wear it, but it’s nice to have that decision out of the way.
So, a cartoon about a pig getting married to a monster with computer skills?
If I dump my woman and catch you can I have the Lego set?