"A Look at Some Previous Pope Benedicts"

From the AP:

Since they only listed a few, I thought we might fill in some of the others:

Benedict II (1101-1103): The first French Pope, he was fond of dancing and light wines. Worked as a music-hall chorus boy in his youth, and was nicknamed “Dockside Doris.” One of the first Popes to incorporate the can-can into the liturgy.

Benedict X (1311-1337): A former pig farmer from Rome, he is thought to have been the instigator for the famous Pig Latin Bible.

Any others? Anyone?

Pope Benedict de Ova I (April 1, 1320) - This mysterious pope served for only one day when it was discovered that he was, in fact, an ad man for the egg industry and was attempting to market a new dish “Eggs Benedict.”

Pope Benedict the Traitor (1795) - A little know Vicar of Rome, Benedict the Traitor was widely believed to be a disgraced former American general when he assumed the Throne of St. Peter in 1795. The fact that he spoke no Italian, was not a Catholic, and wanted to turn the Vatican over to the Italians for $3,000 lire, a duchy, and a hooker to be named later sealed his fate.

Pope Benedict the Teen (13–19). Mostly known for complaining that his life sucked and the Cardinals didn’t understand him, this Pope left no written records behind, because “he didn’t know they were due today, and he left them in his other backpack, and the assignment was stupid, anyway.”

The first Benedict XI and XII (a normally uncounted anti-pope, who served two non-consecutive terms)
A stern, corrupt, lesser relative of the Medicis’ Spanish branch; best known for his personal wealth and the infamous theft of the Ark of the Covenant from the Vatican’s vaults by thieves posing as the Knights Templar (Commonly believed to have been sent by Franklin Oceanus, a Protestant privateer).

:smiley:

Pope Ouef Benedict … liked to listen to boys’ choirs while drinking wine out of a yak sack. He enjoyed cooking and created an interesting combination of poached egg on ham on levened bread with a cream sauce poured over it. Major accomplishment was designing new Papal headwear that made him look taller.

Pope Benedict de Spinoza (1672-1677) - widely hailed as one of the most brilliant Popes in history, he pioneered “rational Christianity” calling on the faithful to read and study, rather than simply accept what they were told. He might have gone down as one of the greatest Popes ever, until it was discovered late in his reign that he was actually Jewish.

Pope Benedicit ed i Getti (1973) - although officially listed as an anti-Pope, he used “the theology of revolution” as a rallying cry for Catholic youth. Even today, left-wing Catholics still use his anthem as a rallying cry.

Hey kids, plug into the faithless
Maybe they’re blinded
But Bennie makes them ageless
We shall survive, let us take ourselves along
Where we fight our parents out in the streets
To find who’s right and who’s wrong
B-B-B-Bennie ed i Getti

Pope Benny Hill Dict (8:30 - 9:00). Best known for introducing “Yakety Sax” into the Mass, along with the shortlived Naughty Nun Chase.

Pope Benedict IX (1299-1301(?)) - Mysterious pope from Sardinia. May have actually been Cardinal Sandriotini, who merely issued the Ben Edict, which stated, of course “That no boy shall be named Ben throughtout the papacy.”

There’s some subtlety here I’m missing. I figure most of your popes could be considered at least a little religious.

Benedict XV-and-a-half (1971-1972), a/k/a Benny the Fat, Big Ben, Chubbs – Most widely known for giving himself a dispensation allowing him to eat Veal Parm on Fridays. Gave up celerey for Lent. Issued a controversial bull known as the Carbonara. Found dead in his chambers during Holy Week, having apparently choked to death on a Marshmallow Peep.

False Pope Benedict XIII (1351-54) – One of the Schismatic popes of Avignon. Blew a potential reconciliation of the Great Schism when he refused to return to Rome because it was Pret-a-Porter season and his daughter was presenting her new line. Historians now believe this was a ruse, however; in reality, Benedict had forgotten the Italian word for bathroom and was too embarassed to ask.

Dirk Benedict (1983-1987) – Cannonized George Peppard. Crusaded against the Cylon heresy. Occasional dust-ups with Cardinal T were widely exaggerated.

–Cliffy

Should that be “Popes Benedict” rather than “Pope Benedicts”? Anybody know?

Pope Benedict III the Mildly Confused, who nearly refused his election on the grounds that he didn’t want to be obligated to relieve himself in the forest for the rest of his life. Advisors took him aside and cleared up the misunderstanding by pointing out that bears were not, in fact, Catholic, and that the Papal residence was fully equipped with toilets and always had been. He then acquiesced.

At the risk of being whooshed, how serious is your confusion regarding religious orders?

Pope Bennedict “Benny” Gans: a seventeenth-century compromise Pope best known for his seventeeth-century compromise eatery, which combined traditional bar food with the Irish dining experience to produce heart failure.

Pope Benedict “Benny” Hana: the first Japanese Pope, remembered for his energetic homilys, which he often delivered while cooking and performing complicated knife and fire tricks.

I can’t say it’s particularly serious, but it’s certainly honest. I mean, I understand that there are different orders in the RCC (Dominicans, Franciscans, Jesuits, etc., right?), but I don’t understand why the adjective “religious” only is meant to apply to some of them. I mean, it is the Chuch. Isn’t religion their entire raion d’etre?

–Cliffy

I think this is one of those sentences that didn’t parse particularly well. Apparently, it is a rarity for a pope to be elected from one of the aforementioned religious orders, rather than from the general population of unaffiliated cardinals.

That is, while all members of the various orders are a) presumably religious and b) members of the RCC, not all members of the RCC are also members of an order (although they are also presumably religious).

Benedict 2K5 (April 15 2005 - April 17 2005) - The so called “skater Pope”. Famous for flip tricks and grinds along the Via Delarosa. Hit by a bus near the Coliseum.

Pope Benedict XIV “The Good Man” (1936) - a sophisticated yet popular prelate who exhorted Catholics to “sing, sing, sing.”

Cliffy the distinction is made between “secular clergy”, the clergy that serves “out in the world”, and the ones that have entered one of the organized communities under a specific Rule. A majority of the RCC’s priesthood/episcopate is secular clergy and not affiliated with any specific Religious Order.

Pope Benedict “Benny” Dere Donna Dat - most famous for his large collection of t-shirts

Pope Benedict “Ben” Wa - the second Japanese Pope, redefined the term “The old ball and chain”

Pope Benedict Ion - known for always having the last word

Pope Benedict “Ben” Angerri - the first Pope to serve ice cream at the Vatican commissary. His favorite flavor was said to be Choir Boisenberry.

Pope Benedict the Peyronistic (995 - 997)

A little know pope who’s only claim to faim was the curve of his papal shaft. Became the brunt of much humor, including giving rise to the punch line “Bent a dick? Hell, I damn near broke it!”