At savage love they are having a little contest. That last entry really got to me. Ouch!
No matter what stupid things I did in my teenage years, I’ve got nothing on these guys. Can’t wait for next week, although I’m hoping it won’t just be a collection of “I got X stuck in there!” stories.
Tomatoes? Were they rubbing with, or sticking it in? I can see the last two, but tomatoes?
They were going for the authentic warm wetness of snatch. No snatch being available, the young wankers decided to improvise. Tomatoes are wet and slippery inside, but straight from the fridge, they’d be far too cold. Thus, the microwave was used to warm up the tomatoes. Same goes for warmed up watermelons.
Unfortunately, it would seem that the microwave had been on too high a setting, causing injury.
… After a horrified gasp, Linda whispers to her husband “when Gallager said he was going to try something new with the watermelons, I didn’t expect this!”
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Zyada *
**
A male friend of mine does this, or at least claims to. He puts tomatoes in a styrofoam cup and microwaves it. Then he covers the cup with Saran Wrap. He claims it feels like having sex with a virgin.
I need new friends.
And her husband said, “Looks like we’ll still need the raincoats.”
You’re sick, twisted and perverted… and I respect that in a man.
A friend of mine has hisself an invention best known as the “Jake-gina.” As you can likely infer, his name is Jake. At any rate… he explained to us how he made himself a bootleg “pocket pussy.” Anyway, he pulled out the cardboard tubing of a full toilet paper roll… put a rubber glove inside the remaining lump of paper, and filled the glove with a lot of lubricant. He proceeded to place this between the toilet seat and the rim of the toilet bowl, get on his knees, and “pump” this. My, my, Jake! You ARE the McGuyver of masturbation. Personally I just stick with a hand…
~ARose