Shameless plug? Um, no. You’re just required by that site, to link back to them. I figure, since they are providing the service they can set the rules, and I followed them. There wasn’t a link option that would work for this board that had the words “image hosted by Imageshack” in the text displayed, so that is the way I did it.
The place I speak of has many widely varied communities and I participate in several of them, (some related to things like mythology, or archeology, others related to EQ etc.) and I’ve noticed this type of behavior in more than one community directed at not just me, but others. Some of the people who have said such things to me are intellectuals, but such behavior isn’t limited to usually intelligent erudite people. It was seeing people who were usually intelligent, making themselves look willfully ignorant that really boggled me. I finally was puzzled enough by it that I decided to ask people who post here what makes such a mind tick, why people did such things, in an attept to better understand where the behavior comes from.
[ol][li]I have never, in my life, worn a fursuit.[/li][li]There’s more to it than sex, fetishism, or porn. In fact, that’s a very minor part for a lot of furries. Like me.[/li][li]My furre pursonae look even less like a person in a fursuit than your icons. (One, in fact, is often almost wholey non-anthro in form.)[/ol] [/li]
So, you’re wrong about what furry is, and how you can identify one. Which I guess is a pretty good indication you’re not.
Let’s continue to how it’s a completely valid assumption, even so, though.
[ol][li]A not-insignificant number of Vah Shir players on EQ are, in fact, furres.[/li][li]Your interest list has a not-insignificant overlap with my LJ interest list. The lack of mentions of furry is a minor hint that you’re not one, but not proof - I have a lot of interests that aren’t on my list. [/li][li]Nor are the interests you highlighted at all mutualy exclusive with furredom - in fact, there’s a rather huge overlap there, too. In fact, most furries I know are also gamergeeks and fantasy readers. Although they do offer a not-neccessarily furry related reason.[/li][li]If you use the same username there, ‘clawbane’ isn’t exactly going to dissuade people that you’re a furre.[/ol][/li]
Once you (over)reacted to it when the assumption was made, you became an easy target to pick on.
Actually, one other thing. We have only your word - and your assumption - that they’re using the ignorant, insulting definition, with no real way of knowing that its their own ignorance that’s showing through, not just your own, or that their intent is, in all cases, to insult you.
No doubt, some are, but it’s by no means guaranteed that they, in fact, are.
So what? First of all, as I see Tengu has already pointed out, the term “furry” broadly applies to all fans of art with anthropomorphic animals. Looking at Zabali’s icons, I’d assume she was a furry in that sense. Secondly, although it may not be nice or accurate to suggest that furries are turned on by anthropomorphic animals, it’s hardly surprising that some people would do so.
I mean, a man could be a fan of the Matrix movies without wanting to have sex with Keanu Reeves. Suggesting otherwise just because he has a Neo icon would be pretty dumb…but it’s not mind-boggling or anything.
Although was not aware that what I was saying could be taken to mean that I was pointing out how to identify a furry, or what a furry was, it seems that this is how what I wrote was taken. I did not mean to offend, and for doing so I apologize. I hope you will forgive me. I will take more care in the future with the meaning of my phrases, it’s the only way I can see that I can “make good”. For the record, I have no problem with people living their life however they want, as long as they don’t do harm to others, follow the spirit of the laws they live in, (if not the exact letter) and at least don’t harm society by what they do.
[QUOTE=Tengu]
Let’s continue to how it’s a completely valid assumption, even so, though.
[ol][li]A not-insignificant number of Vah Shir players on EQ are, in fact, furres. [/li][/QUOTE]
Again, this place is very large, and open, if a person is into any kind of fetish, (not to mention lots of other kinds of interests, almost every single one of my interests has at least one community, the exceptions being “life post-hysterectomy” and “societal conciousness”) and if I’d had such an interest, I’d have said so. I didn’t, in fact I’ve said I’m not. I’m Pagan, and open about that in that other place, and here.
[QUOTE=Tengu]
[li]Nor are the interests you highlighted at all mutualy exclusive with furredom - in fact, there’s a rather huge overlap there, too. In fact, most furries I know are also gamergeeks and fantasy readers. Although they do offer a not-neccessarily furry related reason.[/li][/QUOTE]
Would you continue to hold an assumption about a person, after they’d said “Nah, that doesn’t interest me. I just like Everquest, and that’s where my icon images are from”?
[QUOTE=Tengu]
[li]If you use the same username there, ‘clawbane’ isn’t exactly going to dissuade people that you’re a furre.[/ol][/li][/QUOTE]
My username there, and here is the full name of my primary Everquest character. In Everquest, when you reach level 20, you get to choose a surname for yourself. (You also get to choose your first name, within certain bounds of propriety at the creation of your character.) Often, it’s something related to that character’s adventures so far, or it completes a pun. (For example, my froglok paladin is named “Ieatbugz” and I intend to give him the surname “Forlunch” or something like that, at some point. It’s my concession to utter sillyness. I’ve seen a purple froglok named “Purplicious Peopleater”.)
While sololing in order to gain experience points in order to level, I had to fight a lot of varied creatures that had claws. (I still do fight creatures that have claws when I play, in fact.) The name seemed fitting, and the dual meaning gave it a poetic flair. My character fights clawed beasts, and her claws are the “bane” of evildoers who’d meddle with me or my adventuring group. I don’t give out too much information because I know that I have an ex (who was abusive, I was lucky to get out alive)who is keeping an eye out for me. I know the places he haunts, and what he’ll be looking for, so am staying under his radar. This is why I use my Everquest character’s name for my username, because he’d not play Everquest.
That I can see. It’s the fact that to me, it’s a false accusation. Yeah, I’m going to chill on it. I just also like to try and understand what makes people tick, why they do the things they do. (Such willful ignorance, just to spite someone mystifies me.) So it was a double whammy.
No, these people come out and use words like “G* ded furry" and "she likes to f animals” at other times. There is no doubts as to which meaning they are using, because it’s often from the same group of people in various places.
I thought, since I was going to correct one glaring error to bring more sense to a phrase, that I’d correct the other mistakes I’d spotted. (I did proofread.)
*1 (of the land)
*2 soloing
*3 Re-iterating the fact that it’s not just me that such ignorance is directed at, I’ve seen it directed at others. It honestly puzzles me.
I am aware that not it’s not a sexual thing for all furries, but whether or not furry is a valid insult or that all of them don’t feel that way isn’t really relevant to the situation… it isn’t about a misunderstanding. The people flinging insults here are using it in an extremely derogatory and crude manner. They’re not accusing her of liking furry art. They’re accusing her of wanting to fuck animals because of a stupid icon from a MMORPG. An icon that, I noticed, also includes what looks like some kind of blue elf creature and a human. They’re using furry as an insult at its stereotypical worst to get a reaction out of her, probably even moreso because it isn’t actually true. And, if you want to remove the furry word out of it entirely since it seems to be so loaded, I can understand why someone would be frustrated at being accused of bestiality repeatedly because they play a game with talking animals. But it is as I mentioned, it’s being done to dismiss and get a rise out of her.
Now, why she is letting this bother her, I have no idea. But best I can tell, she’s not making this up nor is she exaggerating the nature of the insults.
Like previously stated, they’re doing it to yank your chain.
It’s hard to understand and also distressing to know that people do this, but the reason is simple: they do it because they’re either assholes or somehow emotionally crippled inside. Don’t waste your time trying to figure them out. Do you waste time trying to figure out why shit stinks? I didn’t think so.
Eh. I’m not going to hold a grudge. I think ignorance has been successfully fought if, in fact, there was ignorance there and not just bad phrasing. Water under the bridge.
Either you misunderstood my point, or I’m misunderstanding yours. I wasn’t trying to imply that anything above is not true - just pointing out how the assumption was not entirely unreasonable at first blush.
No, but if I felt like being a wiseass (which, I admit, I sometimes do, though I try to keep a reign on it) I might play dumb on the point just to tweak them. Which seems to be what these folks are doing.
Interesting story. Kind of goes with my point, though, actually. Clawbane’s appropriate for your character, partially because she’s a furry character - even if you’re not a furre yourself. It’s the kind of name a furry would have.
Well, in that case, ignore my last post. They’re jerks.
So, yeah…same advice as above - ignore them and there’s a good chance they’ll go away.
There is some responsibility to be assigned to Zabali, because she’s yelling “Look at me!” So people are looking. Some are yelling things, and she’s too thin-skinned to let it ride.
Zabali, the only reason these people have consequence is because your overreaction gives it to them.
On their end, they’re just yelling “Hey furry!!” at anyone they can, and waiting for the payoff. It’s just like making the same obscene phone call to everyone in the White Pages, or standing on the streetcorner yelling “hey baby,” at every girl that walks by. 99% shrug it off and recognize them for the juveniles they are, but it only has to get a rise once to create validating entertainment.
Zabali, if they’re doing this to dozens of other people, then why are you the only one up in arms about it? Likely because everyone else has recognized them for the inconsequential hacks that they are and has gone about their business. Which, of course, makes it even worse for you, because they go back to the one person they DO know will take the bait. Every. Single. Time.
Kids on the playground only kick dirt on the girl they know will cry. The sooner you stop being that girl, Zabali, the sooner it will all go away.
To all who kindly replied and offered wise words: I do see the wisdom of your advice, and will follow it in my own way. That doesn’t help much with my puzzlement though. I can see that it’s “trolling” for lack of a better word, and that it’s “random hate”. What I don’t understand, is how a person could “cut off their nose, to spite their face” I guess you could say. How can they make themselves look so ignorant, just for the sake of snark? I guess I just don’t understand how that can bring any kind of gratification to the snarker.
yosemite Heh, um…only if I’m trying to figure out what I ate that caused it, so I can avoid it in future. :o
Yeah, it’s sad that it’s so widespread too. It makes me shiver a bit to think there are so many out there willing to cut themselves for the sake of also cutting someone they may not have even met. I know it must be pretty widespread, and I wonder now, is it because of the nature of the internet, that you “can’t be traced to your source” (if you are careful) very easily that has spawned this manifestation of it? I’d say so. I know that gossip has been around for a long time, and so has bullying. I guess this is the “virtual” version of bullying/gossip. “All the thrill, with almost 0% risk.”
Zabali, I have absolutely no clue why you care what they say about you in the first place, and less of a clue why you keep yammering on about it when many posters have pointed out that’s exactly what they are trying to get you to do. YMMV
Tengu, I am curious, would you share your definition of a furry, and why you are one?
Weirddave because such actions “do not compute” to me. It doesn’t make sense, even though I do understand the world isn’t rational, this form of irrationality still manages to puzzle me. I just don’t get it, but I guess I’ll just have to chalk it up to a form of bullying, even though I don’t understand why they’d choose to use such a method to spite someone, and how they can get anything out of it. Maybe it’s just that they “said a naughty thing”, and this gives them a thrill? I was actually trying to “peer into the mind” of people who do this kind of thing. It’s just my nature to look at such things and try to see where they come from, even if I don’t agree and am repulsed.
Zabali, we told you why they do it. They’re just idiots.
Seriously, stop trying to defend yourself to them. Stop trying to explain things. They don’t care. It’s like trying to teach a pig to sing-it wastes your time and annoys the pig.
If you feel you MUST respond, just give flip little answers, as I have. (I only do it when someone specifically calls me out. If it’s just bashing I shrug). I used to let it hurt me. Some part of me will always be 12 years old, curled up on my bed and dreading going to school the next day. But I don’t let that part of me dictate my behavior as an adult. I simply remember that those days are gone, and they no longer hold power over me.
And hey-if everyone liked me, I’d be doing something wrong.
So STOP. They’re doing it mostly out of boredom and stupidity. If you must keep looking at them, and figuring it out, then do it on your own time, and quit harping over it to everyone else, because it only fans the flames.
The definition on the page that Zibali linked to that doesn’t include the phrase ‘sick, sad people’ is pretty good - although I’m a little less of a ‘lumper’ than whoever wrote that one.
Taking this part, and leaving out the editorialising would work:
Throw in ‘roleplaying’, and note that it’s also used to refer to the anthro animals in question, and it’s pretty much correct.
There is a bit of a problem of trying to come up with a definition that includes everything that is, and excludes everything that isn’t. The dividing line gets to be a bit blurry, and there’s a point at which it gets to be more self-identification than a hard-and-fast rule. Or else it tends to exclude a lot of things that most would tend to include, or include things most would tend to exclude.
I guess I just don’t understand how that can bring any kind of gratification to the snarker.