I lost my father when I was fourteen and I’m aware of that loss every day of my life. He was mentally ill, too, twickster, and so I can grasp what you mean. It’s difficult, but at the same time that’s your parent and you can’t replace him or her.
raises a toast in honour of twickster’s mum
Tip of my drink to all that have lost their Mothers.
I’m lucky that my Mom is still around, we’re moving her into her own apartment this Sunday after she’s spent three years living with my Sister while recuperating from heart surgery. My Father died 13 years ago this week. I just read “Brief Lives” recently and this quote hit me where I live.
“-You are mortal: it is the mortal way. You attend the funeral, you bid the dead farewell.
You grieve. Then you continue with your life.
And at times the fact of her absence will hit you like a blow to the chest, and you will weep. But this will happen less and less as time goes on.
She is dead.
You are alive.
So live.”
Dream to his son Orpheus, in Brief Lives
My father died fifteen years ago next month, and my mother a year later. I miss them both, but they were in their nineties and lived long, fulfilled lives. I was ready to let them go, but I do miss them, and I am amazed at how a word or phrase will call their memories back.
If yours are still alive, don’t waste a day that you could spend with them. Ask about their pasts. What do they remember from childhood or adolescence. I regret not asking my Dad more about his early years, and the same with my Mom. Do it now. Yoiu may not get another chance.