A sniffle is not the flu!

From Wikipedia-“Influenza, commonly referred to as the flu, is an infectious disease caused by RNA viruses of the family Orthomyxoviridae (the influenza viruses), that affects birds and mammals. The most common symptoms of the disease are chills, fever, sore throat, muscle pains, severe headache, coughing, weakness/fatigue and general discomfort.[1] Although it is often confused with other influenza-like illnesses, especially the common cold, influenza is a more severe disease caused by a different type of virus.[2] Influenza may produce nausea and vomiting, particularly in children,…”

I am over my work colleagues complaining that they have the flu. I want to slap them into some sense. If you have the flu you would not be at work with a slight cold.
I used to not understand when people talked about the flu killing people- people talked about the 1919 flu pandemic killing more poeple than war did in WWI. I used to think how could people die of a sniffle. That was when I was younger. I have learned.
I had the flu once- I was flat on my back for 5 days- aches everywhere. The only time I have ever had time off work.

The ABC had a news item on a new flu season being deadly this year. As part of their vision was a guy walking down the road patting his nose because he had a runny nose. Do I have to scream at a news service - A sniffle is not the flu!

Perhaps we need new terms. In Melbourne most people say they have the flu when they just have a cold. I think they want their affliction to sound serious. When you hear someone say they have the flu, you know they have a cold. I do not know whether this just occurs in Melbourne. I do not think so.

So we need new terms- either a new term for common cold or new term for the flu.

Please stop saying you have the flu when you do not.
To others, please scream at those who do.

You should’ve checked the disambiguation. It is perfectly cromulent in causal (i.e. not medical) situations to use “flu” to mean the stomach flu, “influenza-like illness,” etc.

Doesn’t mean that your coworkers aren’t nancies though. And yes, stay the fuck home if you’re contagious.

If you have a flu-like illness you do not have a sniffle. They are nancies- see your link for Man flu.

When I have a terrible, terrible cold, I tell people I have the Venusian Death Flu. I rely on the fact that most of my friends either have common sense or have sufficient medical education to determine, from the prefix “Venusian Death”, that I am being snarky.

If the rest of the world seriously thinks that any kind of a sniffle/miserable illness is the “flu”, I think I have a Wikipedia page to go create…

I propose . . . the flu,

and . . . influenza!
I’ll go and sit in the corner now, but really, I do feel your pain.

CMC fnord!

How to tell the difference between a cold and a flu:

You are on your couch resting due to your illness, and glance out the window. There is a $100 bill sitting on your lawn. If you get up, go outside, and retrieve the bill, congratulations, you have a cold. If you decide “It ain’t worth it”, you have the flu.

Most of these people who do not have the flu get flu shots, even though they never seem to prevent their colds from occurring.

As far as I know I have never had influenza in my entire life. I just get the rare cold, which occasionally are achy feverish bad ones, or I get food poisoning. I do not, therefore, get flu shots.

It has been at least three years since I last had a cold.

But a cough…
Well, a cough is definitely the plague.

Excellent advice, and I used to do exactly that.

However, since we now get a visit from Smiling Admin Lady with her little clipboard if we are off work twice in a rolling year, and have to sign a letter saying that we acknowledge that we will be subject to a formal “review” if we are off a third time, I drag my sorry ass into the open floor office and infect the hell out of my coworkers unless I have a clear year behind me.

I’ve had the flu twice in my life. I think, it could have been something else. During those times, I don’t think that I would have been able to recognize that it was money, much less be able to focus enough enough to think about what to do about it.

Last year, during the flu season, I was all sniffly and coughy. I got sent home from work becasue people were complaining that I had the flu and would get them sick. I have allergies to plant pollen. I told everyone that it was just allergies. Nooooo…I had the flu and had to use my PTO to sit at home and blow my nose.

Now that its not flu season, people are allowed to sniffle and cough because its not the flu. Ticks me off a bunch.

People say ‘go home and don’t infect people’. The reality is that not many people have that kind of luxury in their jobs.

On my last job, we had no sick time. No work = no pay. And a ludicrously small number of absences with or without a doctor’s note meant progressive disciplinary steps. The #1 cause of people being fired was for absenteeism. Of course, most of those were young people just screwing around and being persistently late or not going in because a new game came out or they just didn’t feel like it, but the number of days to miss before hitting warnings still affected everyone. This meant going in sick anyway and, because there were 300 people in one large room, sickness moving through it like a wave.

On my new job, I’m a contractor. No work = no pay. Oh sure, I could miss an entire week and not run into any disciplinary issues, but being short a week’s pay would hurt a lot. So I go in, no matter what I feel like.

I think if you are able to make a conscious decision to go to work or not then luckily you either don’t have flu, or are one of the fortunate few who don’t get hit too hard.

Me? I’ve had the flu twice in my life and I can’t even conceive of being able to go in to work. Seriously. From first symptoms to fully bedridden in 2 hours each time. I couldn’t walk the five yards to the bathroom without collapsing and so stayed in bed for pretty much five full days. Shattered but unsleeping. Sweating, shaking, cramping and unable to summon the will to read or even watch TV. Utter misery. My wife had never had the flu and hadn’t seen the effects close up and she was astonished how severe it was.
The after-effects lasted a full month after that and having been through it I’ll never underestimate the severity. It is a killer.
I’m not trying one-upmanship here, I just always relate my experience in the hope that perhaps some extra people decide to get flu shots. It is a really good idea.

Movie logic: if someone sneezes even once, they’re getting sick. If someone coughs once, they are going to die soon. If a period drama, this means tuberculosis. If modern, it usually means that they will have blood in their handkerchief, and not show anybody else.

Offer to “get” coffee for your boss/Admin Lady. If you’re well enough to be at work, then there should be no problems!

I’m with you on this. I used to think the flu was something fairly lightweight until my wife spent several days in the hospital with it. She said it was the only time in her life when she thought she might truly die.

Can I add a special mention for those annoying co-workers who put their fingertips to their brow and shake their head and say “ooooh… I’m having a migraine.”?

I am aware that there are several different kinds of migraine headache, but for the most part, unless you are curled in a ball in a dark room feeling alternating waves of agonizing pain and nausea, then it probably isn’t a migraine.

Agreed … though I do have a cousin that gets the painless ocular migraines. Makes me want to whack him with a brick to give him a headache … :mad:

I have had the actual influenza a couple times, once it wasn’t much worse than when I had mono, the other time I felt like i was going to die, and then was worried I wasn’t going to die. One of the most unpleasant couple weeks I ever spent not in a hospital. Though the time the hallucinations hit mrAru was considering getting me to a hospital when the fever finally broke enough to stop the hallucinations. Now I get a flu shot every fall.

Likewise. It’s ironic since I work for a hospital system.

I’m often amused how paranoid people can get.

Once on a rainy morning during that whole bird-flu thing that was supposed to kill us all, or so the media would have us believe, I got on a mostly-full Metro train and sniffed once (because I had walked a little ways in the rain), and the guy sitting in front of me turned and gave me a dirty look, then at the next stop he jumped up, ran off the train, and got back on the next car up. Seriously dude? I was tempted to move up to the next car, sit next to him, and start sneezing and coughing, but I didn’t.

Clearly the Infection Gods were reading this thread, tapped the screen at my post and said “Oh yeah! I’d forgotten about him!” ZAAAPPP!!

Been suffering a cold for the last two days, just as achey, sniffly, and scratchy* as I recall the last cold I had was. But, though it shares symptoms, it’s certainly not influenza, or pneumonia, it’s just a 24 hour cold that confines me to rest.

Right now my head feels like magpies are singing at me through ten layers of cotton wool. ArdleWargleOodleSpoodleMoodle Plus I can barely walk in a straight line upright, like Neanderthal Man.


*rejected dwarf names

Ah,** blueslipper**, your complaint is an old one.

“He has not got 'flu,” said Hercule Poirot. “He has only a nasty cold. Everyone always thinks they have 'flu. It sounds more important. One gets more sympathy. The trouble with a catarrhal cold is that it is hard to glean the proper amount of sympathetic consideration from one’s friends.”

from Hallowe’en by Agatha Christie

Guanolad: Your rejected dwarf names and muffled magpie song made me laugh out loud. Thanks for that. If humour is the best medicine, you should be fine soon. :wink: