As tragic as teen pregnancies are (or for that matter, any “unwanted” pregnancies), not all of us would believe that statement.
You seem to just mention adoption in passing…as something that could easily be prevented by cruel parents. I have not seen any poster here support that notion of forcing teenagers to raise babies, to “deny an adoption”…I believe that kind of statement is a bit of a red herring.
Are there many parents out there telling teenage girls that they must raise their babies and take the legal responsibility for them…that they are forbidden to put those babies up for adoption?
Getting back to the OP, RoboDude said
“IMO, parents have as much right to stop their kids from getting abortions or birth control pills as Jehovah’s Witnesses have to srop their children from getting blood transfusions, by which I mean none whatsoever.”(sic)
I take extreme exception to that kind of statement…and it would appear that several other pro choice folks in this thread are taking at least “some” exception to that statement as well.
Let me say what I have already stated: Forcing the girl to have the baby is an abusive decision. Not so much because of pregnancy itself, but because of what would happen once the baby is born. Even if the baby is given up for adoption, there’s the possibility that when the baby grows up, he/she will want to get to know his/her biological parents.
There could be. I’ve heard of people acting as though girls should “take responsibility for their actions”, effectively viewing teenage motherhood as punishment for being sexually active and callously ignoring the fact that the baby is being punished just as severely by being raised by someone who is ill-prepared to do so.
Well at least under current laws (YMMV by locale) adoptions typically remain confidential (as I think they should btw, for just this reason)…so a simple desire of the child to know it’s biological mother (or father, I guess) should not impact on the mother.
I don’t mean to make the adoption procedure sound easy or trivial ( I have 3 very close friends who have had babies when in high school or college, and put them up for adoption). However, I don’t think that having the teenager put the baby up for adoption qualifies as an “abusive” act.
Okey-dokey I’d like some cites please illustrating the problem of “many” parents forcing their teenage girls to raise their babies themselves as punishment for their sexual activity.
I didn’t say there were, only that there could be. I haven’t heard of any statistics that would show whether this is a serious problem, but it is highly probable that some of the folks who view teenage motherhood as punishment have kids, and it is certainly possible that some of their kids might be pregnant.
I don’t know how often this sort of thing happens, but IMO society has a duty not to let it happen.
What if the girl lives in a location where adopted children have the legal right to know their biological parents? (I don’t know which states allow that, but there was some serious debate over whether it thould be allowed.)
Well at this point then, I consider the notion of parents forcing teenage girls to raise their babies a non-issue at best…and more likely a red herring in the context of this particular debate. There are lots of bad things that “could be” or “possibly be” present in life…
Gee…maybe work to change the law that allows this to happen? I would gladly join my pro choice friends in debating nut jobs like these
I don’t think it’s a non-issue. If a parent can forbid or compel an abortion based on parental authority, and we make no exceptions to parental authority except in cases of abuse, then it’s only logical that the parent can forbid or compel adoption based on that same authority.When I worked in child protective services, more than one adult client who wanted to surrender her baby was under extreme pressure from her own parents not to do it ( “You’re giving our grandchild away” more than punishment, but that could have been an issue, too}.Had those women been minors, and those parents had a legal right to prevent the adoption, they surely would have done so. There were always pregnant teenagers whose parents would force them to surrender the baby if they could (they couldn’t-the most they could do was avoid having teenager and baby living with them),and one 14 year old who thought she was pregnant (turned out she wasn’t) whose parents were incensed to find out that not only would they be unable to force her to have an abortion, but that there were agencies that would assist her in keeping the baby,regardless of their feelings in the matter.If parents get to make the decision, there will certainly be some parents making each of the possible decisions.
The adoption issue can be gotten around by having the act of being a parent emancipate a minor (as it at least sometimes does) but that brings up the issue of how the same teenager who couldn’t make her own decision about abortion suddenly becomes capable a few months later of making all sorts of decisions about herself and her baby.
I don’t particularly like the idea of teenagers not needing parental consent for abortion, but I like the alternatives even less.
I had wanted to answer this in email, **RoboDude,{/b] so as not to completely hijack, but your email isn’t available here.
As of yet, no state allows adopted children the right to know their biological parents, if the adoption was a closed one. A couple of states have allowed adoptees the right to have access to their adoption records and/or original birth certificates, so that they can search on their own or through a confidential intermediary, but that’s it. Many states, if not all of them, do now have the practice of allowing for open adoption, though. This is where the birthparents select who will adopt their child, and maintain a continuing relationship with them and the child, starting from birth. The degree of openness varies from situation to situation, depending on the wishes of all parties involved. This is what I have, and it’s working beautifully for us.
If Maggie had violently assaulted a classmate, her parents could legally and rightfully insist that she make reparations and undergo counseling. They could even turn her over to a juvenile court, if the act was sufficiently violent. Heck, if she were to violate the rules of her campus, then she can likewise be held responsible for those. The same holds for any number of misdeeds.
Being a minor does NOT absolve someone of her responsibilities – legal or otherwise.