Miss Gypsy, the same thing happened to my first daughter! I felt totally unqualified to be a Mommy at the time. I had three daughters, and they got nipped by clippers, rolled to the floor and yet they managed to survive.
If you’ve got kids, you’ve got Booboos.
I have no children, but this is something that happened to me:
When I was a very young’un, still being bottle-fed, my father left me with his sister for an afternoon. She was doing some mending, something involving a needle and thread, when she realised it was time to feed me. Down went the mending, I was picked up, and she tried to feed me.
Tried.
Everytime I would lean forward for the bottle, I would get half-way there, wail, and lean back again. She couldn’t figure it out. I was obviously hungry, it couldn’t be that the milk was too hot because I hadn’t actually gotten my hands on the bottle yet.
It was only when my aunt glanced down that she realised her sewing needle had gotten caught on her shirt when she put down her mending, and every time I leaned forward I was getting stabbed with it. I think I ended up with four or five nasty scratches before she figured it out.
This story was related to me by said Aunt when I was in my teens.
In similar fashion, my husband bashed our poor darling son’s head into a CEILING FAN. :eek:
And he grew up to be a Mythbuster? 
Another nail-biter here.
And I honestly don’t know a single parent in real life who hasn’t had at least one kid roll off the bed or couch. Prepare yourself, because it’s probably going to happen at some point.
Um, what else. I’ve stepped on my daughter’s toes when she sneaked up to stand behind me–I’ve knocked her down on her bottom from that, too. I’ve also done the head-bonk when putting into the car seat thing.
Funny, she still seems to love me despite it all. 
Hang in there…you’ll be fine!
This is funny! I came here to say I also bit my girls’ nails–I have my first grandbaby and her mommy is biting them too! Nobody ever told me to do that, I just figured it out on my own. I always preferred to change diapers on the floor so they couldn’t fall, too. Kids somehow manage to survive in spite of their parents. I once drove from Memphis to Texas with my first baby in her car seat. In the car seat–lying there–not strapped in! She’s now a school teacher.
I nipped my second son’s thumb with the nail clippers when he was only a couple weeks old. I felt awful and there seemed to be so much blood, but it healed up really quickly. A few months later, my husband was playing rugby in the house (yeah, I know) with our oldest, not quite 3 at the time. Some sort of tackling incident resulted in my son bashing his head on the corner of the baseboard and getting this deep, weird looking wound. It didn’t bleed at all (which is really strange for the forehead) and just sort of turned black. I took him to the hospital (my littlest had had his first ER visit that weekend, too, due to bronchiolitis) because there was a big game on that night that my husband didn’t want to miss. My son ended up just getting a little liquid bandage and he healed right up, with just a tiny scar. I like to bring this incident up frequently to tease my husband. Not the fact that my son got hurt, but that I had to take him to the ER.
Never mind.
I don’t have kids, but I have a scar across one eyebrow.
When I was three, my mother opened a door and hit me with the handle, which was sharp. I was groggy but apparently more surprised than anything else; I was also bleeding like a pig.
It didn’t even require stitches, but ever since, Mom has been very careful about opening doors.
My mom and I went to a “baby basics” class before my niece was born, just as a refresher for her and some knowledge for me in case anyone ever left me in charge of the sprite.
Every single thing they taught us in that class seemed like a lesson in how easy it is to hurt a baby. Baby’s gonna choke. Baby’s gonna freeze. Baby’s gonna get knocked unconscious. Baby’s gonna DIE.
After the class the nurse asked me if I was ready to take care of my niece now. I said NO FUCKING WAY…the class was informative enough to let me know how un-qualified I am. I’ll leave all the maiming to the parents and admire her from afar.
They never mentioned amputating your kid’s toe with errant hair. Now I’m even MORE paranoid than before!
Ooh I did that once too. Not as far a trip though.
kaylasmom was home alone one day while I was at work, and our back-fence neighbor came over and said, “Let’s go. I’m taking you to the tea room over on Seventeenth Street.” So she put Michaela into her Snugli (or whatever that chest-papoose thing was called), saddled up the guide dog, stepped out the door, and promptly fell over on top of the baby.
That wasn’t the incident that made her feel like a horrible mother, though. Once, she took a bottle of formula out of the refrigerator, warmed it in the microwave, and tried to feed her. Michaela simply could not get any formula out of the bottle, though, and she cried and cried. And kaylasmom cried and cried. They were both still crying when I came home and found that there was a plastic disk underneath the nipple that Michaela was trying to drink though.
After that, I stopped including that disk when I prepared bottles.
My mom accidentally burned me with her cigarette when I was about three. We were sitting side by side on a couch, she with a newspaper and me with a book. Of course, our arms were close together and at one point, Mom turned the page of the paper and as she did, the cigarette between her fingers contacted the inside of my wrist. She said I never even looked up from my book, but she felt like the world’s worst mother.
I’ve bonked, stepped on, knocked down, etc. all my kids at one point or another. I think the worst I ever felt was when my son got into my extra-strength Tylenol and ate some without my noticing–when I was right there in the room with him. We were in Branson in a hotel and he managed to get the little travel bottle out of my purse, open the “childproof” cap and eat at least two of them. He wasn’t even two years old then–how he got the cap off is a mystery to me, and how he gagged down two extremely bitter tablets is a bigger one! But for him to do that while I was right there was terribly guilt-inducing (I’d been working puzzles in a book) and the fact that I was about five months pregnant and had crazy hormones didn’t help!
(BTW, he was fine–they gave him liquid charcoal at the ER and checked for Tylenol in his blood, which was at non-dangerous levels after the treatment!)
My best friend dislocated her three-year-old daughter’s arm - twice! The hospital ER told her it’s quite common as children’s tendons are more flexible than adults’ are, so I’m surprised that no-one else has mentioned it yet
My daughter decided to start crawling when I put her down on the bed one day. I turned my back to change my shirt and turned around just in time to see her crawl head first off the bed! Other than a mild carpet burn on her forehead and a bad case of indignation, she was fine!
I nipped Beta-chan with the nail clippers once. It does bleed, and babies do cry. She still loves her daddy, so not all was lost.
My grandmother accidentally gave me a separated shoulder when I was a baby. Feel better now?
What happened was that she was lying on her back, and was holding me by the arms as she bounced me on her stomach. I fell off to one side and pop went my shoulder.
We were at the water park and Mom was relaxing in the shade while I was playing. I was really, really thirsty and ran up and grabbed Mom’s can of pop and took a swig - and promptly gagged and spit it out. Turns out she had finished the drink and was using it as her ashtray. She shoved a fistful of money at me so I could go to the concession stand and buy myself whatever I wanted.
There’s also a pic of little me after falling off a bed. There’s a big bruise on my forehead and a so not amused look on my face.
I was with my months-old son in the back seat of the car. I went to flick the ashes from my cigarette out the window, and the window wasn’t down! I lost the cherry off my cigarette, and looked and looked for it. Suddenly, ReboSon was screaming. The fire had fallen into his carseat and burned his little leg.
I felt like the worst mom ever. 
Don’t feel bad. I had a thread on here once about a baby that belted me right in the eye. He curled up his stupid little baby fist and WHAM right in the eye. I had a black eye.
Other parents quickly chimed in about how their babies beat them up. Evidently the baby banging his/her head against the parents face has given quite a few parents, chipped teeth and bloody noses.
So babies aren’t so innocent either