Accused of abuse and neglect

I can’t go into great detail here, but in working with mentally challenged people, I have been informed today that I am suspended without pay, while waiting on an investigation. I have been accused of abuse and neglect.

I have been doing this for four years, with an excellent record.

I am very hurt, angry, devastated and running a huge rage of emotions about this, and I know I haven’t done anything at all.

I feel like this is a no win situation. If I am cleared, how can I go back to doing me job knowing that someone has accused me of this? If I am not cleared, I will be unemployed and I truly do not have funds to survive even two weeks.

Can you all just send some good vibes my way?

Wow. That totally sucks!
All the good vibes I can spare are headed right for you!


Not the same thing, as my livelihood was not at stake, but I’ve been through the experience of being reported for child neglect, so I think I at least understand some of your rage and hurt.

Is this an internal investigation or is there an external agency that handles this kind of thing?

Many good vibes coming your way.

It is an internal investigation. They will not even explain to me exactly what I am accused of. Just abuse and neglect.

I care a great deals for these people and would never hurt them, or anyone else.

That was one of my biggest sources of rage with the child neglect accusation. The anonymity of the person making the shit up (and the details of his/her accusations) was completely protected. :mad:


I was once called into a meeting at a job I held years ago and told I had said something offensive to someone. They wouldn’t tell me what I said, who I said it to, or just the general topic that was found to be offensive. I was then told never to do it again. :dubious: I worked there for another 2 years after that. I hope your situation ends up the same way.

My son was born with a cavernous hemangioma: a great big stork bite on one cheek. It was spongy and raised and beet red. Eventually it disappeared; but it caused me lots of “fun” in the meantime.

I was standing on Telegraph avenue one balmy summer evening, chatting with my friend Jose Luis from Spain, my little son peacefully asleep in his pram, when suddenly three University of California police cars pull up and dislodge six cops, who come up to me and start grilling me about my son’s “wound.” They decide they’re not qualified to make a decision, and so a minute or so later here comes a hook-and-ladder-fire-engine with the sirens going and the horn blaring, and it parks right in front of me and dislodges the paramedics, who come up and strip my son naked right there on the sidewalk to look for bruises.

Thank God my pediatrician answered his phone (pager, in them days) that evening!

Some passerby had seen the bright red birthmark, and mistaken it for a contusion. I remember the woman in question, I’m certain it was her. She was a sheltered and affluent type who had probably never seen anyone actually wounded in her life. Honestly, I have never seen any injury that looked remotely like this birthmark. Yet people used to stop me in the grocery store and say, “He fell, huh?”

Make sure you find out if you have the right to representation. PM me if you need more information, although I’m not sure how the right to counsel applies to someone in an advocate position. But don’t let them f**k you over, and don’t let them intimidate or try to shame you.

This nation was founded by puritans. Don’t start me on puritans!

And, hang tough.

We had an “internal investigation” with a private investigator pulling everyone to an office on a schedule. About 5 people in we got wind of some of the mind games and crazy accusations being made. One of the girls mothers was an attorney and came along for the interview but did not reveal her status as such (only as mom of minor). It lasted about 3 questions before mom played the lawyer card and told him she would represent every single employee in the park for free to make sure this witchhunt did not continue.

They interviewed about three more people and gave up.

2 years later, they tried again. This time several of the employees (myself included) coached many of the staff on what to say and not to fall for any of the little tricks. Basically play stupid, when he asks about who you know who is stealing you say “I dunno, never saw anything”

Nobody was disciplined or fired

Another vote for get a lawyer.

Don’t let the bastards get you down, dragongirl!

I really can’t imagine a much worse kick in the gut than being accused of something like that, all the more so if they won’t even tell you the specific details of what they’re investigating you for. Just hang in there, and above all don’t let them bully you. I suppose the best case scenario is that it’s all some horrible misunderstanding; I have an even harder time imagining the kind of slimeball who would fabricate such an accusation, but we all know they exist. :frowning:

Do keep us up to date to whatever extent you safely can!

{{{good vibes}}}

Hang tough and don’t let the bastards intimidate you!!

Good vibes…

…and get a lawyer.

Good luck, dragongirl. I’ll be thinking of you. (Don’t you have right though to know what you’ve been accused of? I can’t imagine why they WOULDN’T be required to tell her?)

OOOOOOOh, so that’s what it’s called! The baby of the owner of one of the flats I’ve rented had one, I’ve always been curious about it but it’s not like you can stop in the middle of signing the contract and say “I’m sorry, what’s that red stuff on your kid’s face?” It would definitely constitute breach of the social contrat (although not of the rental contract).

Thanks, I’ll go look it up now because nosy minds want to know.


Without pay?! Surely that’s contravening the presumption of innocence? Also, you need to know the details of the accusation so you can prepare a defence. Get a lawyer.

And good luck!

I agree with Quartz that suspension WITHOUT pay is bullshit. Get a lawyer and read your employee handbook to see what your rights are. Good luck.

I’ve been accused of some sort of malfeasance twice in my life. Once it was a charge of bilking the company of overtime. It turned out to be a guy who disliked me for some reason. The other time it was a charge of discrimination from a woman I interviewed for an admin assistant job and didn’t hire. Both charges were spurious, but it doesn’t make it any less wounding when you’re on the receiving end and know you are innocent. I hope it all works out for you, but I’d check with legal counsel because of the seriousness of the charge.

That’s terrible, dragongirl :frowning: I hope this thing gets resolved soon and your name is restored!

Oh … and get a lawyer. If you’re in any kind of union, you should talk to your union rep too.

I think they can do that because if she is found innocent, she should get back pay for those days or something like that (in my extremely non-expert opinion).