See here. A fractured-English classic. 
But bless their hearts. They try. I especially like: “Wear safety chute while boarding the ship.”
That’s pretty good. I lucky to be alive, I guess. I spent some time in Thailand with no safety chute or primary chute for that matter.
They forgot to encourage tourists to learn and be aware of the implications of the term “Katoy”
No. 5.5 “Severe House” sounds alarming. I might not WANT to be provided with any “severe injured”.
Edited for typo - I meant “severe”, not “sever”, dammit.
It’s better just to let them learn on their own. 
That tour that ends up at the jewelry store scam is a bitch though- is everyone in Bangkok in on it? You can’t be white and walk twenty feet without someone trying to get you with it.
I hope you’re not speaking from experience! :eek:
Does this mean you’re not interested in this ring I have for sale? 
Why do they care how much noise you make in the forest? Are they worried you’ll wake up the animals, or what?
And how am I supposed to eat at a restaurant without taking food and beverage from the strangers?
I can’t stop thinking about the Alien’s Infant, either…
And those photos at the bottom are odd choices. All except the one in the upper right seem to be of people who have been arrested. The upper-left one I’m sure I remember from the news as a drug bust. The other two besides the upper-right one have the feel of a police press conference. They like to do that here with important arrests, trot the detainees out for viewing. The upper-right photo is more relaxed and I’m sure is not a bust.
Depends what kind of experience you have in mind.
Example, touring around Chiang Mai
GF- Psst, Ale, the tour guide?, she´s a man.
Me- blink-blink NO WAY!
Hehehe. I’m sure you’re well on your way now to spotting them every time like the rest of us.
They left out the most important advice–to avoid Country Roads karaoke!