How about just asking her, the same way you might ask her if she wants to go and see a movie or have coffee or whatever?
Anyone else read the title as “pr0n”, not “prom”?
No?
Oh.
Another Idea I cooked up: in front of her, pull off your pants and put a Groucho Marx eyeglasses-mustache-and nose on your junk and make a falsetto noise. Make your junk do the talking. She’ll be like putty in your teeth…or something like that. I suck with similies.
Take Three:
Vinnie (in the same tone of voice he would use to ask for a pencil): Hey Rachel, I’d really like to take you to the prom with me. Will you come?
Rachel (surprised): Oh, um, I’m kind of waiting for James to ask me… do you mind?
Vinnie: No that’s okay, I was only asking you on a bet.
I think it’s important for Vinnie to escape from the rejection situation with his dignity intact. 
We don’t have proms over here, and if we had it’s for sure I wouldn’t have had a prom date. You may be able to guess why.
Mail her a letter that contains a picture of your parents or some other older people in their prom get-ups. Write a little something asking her if she’d be your date.
Keep telling yourselves that, guys.
There’s a lot of men saying that in this thread, and only one foreign woman (no offense, Nava, but you can’t be expected to have a gut-level understanding of the spectacle that is prom - it is nothing like a movie date). **Kalhoun **and I both think showing a little effort would be appreciated. It doesn’t have to be a Liberace scale razzle-dazzle-her, but since the OP *wants *to do some clever-clever, I bet she’d love it.
Agreed with Defective Detective. Always say that you have another in mind to ask if you get rejected. Then you look less desperate, and she doesn’t feel bad for rejecting you. Of course, you could always do the ol’ “You have a date for prom yet?” and take it from there.
I get the impression that proms in the US are much more important than they were when I was in high school in Ontario in 1981. And they were a semi-big deal then. There were nice outfits and such, and music, and taxis; I don’t think anyone arrived in a limo, but I could be wrong.
Being there was more important than being accompanied; I went alone. But at least I went, and said goodbye to some of the people I’d known for those five years.
I hear that in the States, it’s insane.
I used the following line to pick up a prom date: “Hey I’ve got a big penis, wanna go to prom with me?”.
Though, it only worked for me when I went to prom in junior year (high school was too small to only have seniors go) because I had a little something going with the chick I asked (aw, romance!).
No, no, no, no, no… ack. I was that guy, folks. I was the guy who always did something clever-clever, who never could just say, “hey, want to go out some time?” It was awful, and I still cringe everytime I think about it.
With respect, WhyNot, my guess is that you’re thinking about this from the perspective of having someone in whom you’re already romantically interested asking you out/to prom/to the wedding/whatever, rather than just someone. It’s easy to imagine “a little effort” being appreciated when, in the back of your mind, the person expending the effort is someone to whom you’re already and definitely attracted.
The problem with theatrical gestures, I eventually learned, is twofold. One, it gives the girl no comfortable way out. If Johnny just says, “hey, Suzie, want to go to prom with me?” and she is thinking, “eh, not so much,” she can say some variation on “no,” and everyone gets to maintain the pleasant fiction that it didn’t mean that much to the asker, so Suzie doesn’t have to feel like she crushed his soul. If Johnny does something clever-clever and romantic, then he doesn’t give Suzie that out, that mutually accepted, graceful way to decline. This is particularly bad if Johnny’s gesture is something public, so that Suzie has to deal with all her friends saying, “Oh, but it was so romaaaaaantic, why would you say no?”
The second problem is that most romantic gestures come on too strong, such that even someone who might be interested can be turned off. In my college years, I was interested in a very pretty girl with whom I was doing a show. So, on opening night, I had eleven pink roses delivered to the theatre, then handed her one red rose afterward (I am literally twisting in embarassment telling this story) and asked her out. The red rose and the asking were not public, but everyone knew she had gotten the eleven pink roses. So there was that; everyone knew someone was asking her out, so she had no chance to soft-pedal it. She wound up acting very weird around me, basically withdrawing from contacting me at all. Two years later, we came into contact again, long after we had both moved on to other romantic interests. She told me at that time that she would, theoretically, have been interested - had I not come on so painfully strong. The overt gesture had made her feel like I was way too interested in her, given our relatively modest level of association to that point, and frankly creeped her out.
Vinnie, just ask her nicely. Unless she’s already your girlfriend, or something like that, and the asking is more a formality than a real question; in that case, go to town.
He already knows she’s going to accept. She already knows the kind of guy he is. He’s simply trying to make it an outstanding little memory for the two of them. I see nothing wrong in putting a little something together that will make this event stand out for the two of them. I think it’s sweet.
I agree with you, really I do. But he said in the OP that he was sure she’d say yes, which, if we believe him, means that they have some sort of connection/romance already, or that he’s psychic. 
If this isn’t the case, I withdraw all advice, because you’re absolutely right. Potential public humiliation only works when you KNOW she’s going to say yes.
This thread has some interesting suggestions that might be what you are looking for.
Ask her sooner rather than later, she might get tired of waiting, and accept another invitation. Also, if you are wrong, and she says no, you have more time, and more options to get over it and find another date.
I’d love to!
I went with a male friend, no romance at all…it’s about time I got asked, even if I’m almost 31!
Do you want to go to the prom with me?
Wood eye!
(penis ensues)
Yeah, just be careful with this advice: she might take it just a little too far . . .
Let’s just say my Junior Prom. . . hoo boy. All I’m going to admit to is that I fell asleep in the limo, and the next thing you know I’m wearing a white zoot suit in Paraguay, sitting on a bamboo throne covered in flowers, being carried towards the mouth of a volcano with natives happily chanting behind me. The escape was a just little more harrowing . . .
Tripler
Yeah, I got lei’d alright.
When I was a senior in high school, I was watching the TV school announcements one morning, and just before the “anchorwoman” signed off, she said, “And now, I have a message for StuffLikeThatThere: Will.” I was immediately the center of a small storm of kids (and a teacher, as I recall) asking me what the heck was going on. I had no idea. I didn’t even know if the message was “will” or “well.” The next period, someone else walked up to me and said, “I have a message for you: You.”
I got a word each period for the rest of the day, some from students, some from teachers, and some written on chalkboards in my classrooms, to make the question, “Will you go with me to prom?” I’d figured out sometime during the day what was going on, and had a pretty good idea of who was responsible. After school, he strolled up to my locker and said, “Well?” I said yes, and he had a flower for me. It was very sweet, immense fun, and the talk of the school for a couple of days. I still smile when I think about it. It didn’t cost a thing except some time and whatever a red rose was going for in 19<mumblemumble>.
We were friends, and weren’t romantically involved before, during, or after the prom, but I loved that he went to that effort to make it a fun thing and a special memory. Sure, there’s less risk involved in mumbling an invitation to the prom as if you’re asking her out for coffee, but what fun is that?
So we know she’s going to say yes. It can still be a turn off to do a big production about it. That just sets you up for a dissapointing date because the asking was way better than the date. Any yahoo with money can get something displayed on some billboard. It takes a man to pass a note written on toilet paper under the stall while shes taking a shit. Oh if I could propose to my wife again!
Rule #1 - Never assume anything with a [del]woman[/del] female will occur as planned. Many a [del]man’s[/del] male’s heart has been [del]broken[/del] [del]dashed[/del] cut up into little pieces assuming she will say yes.
Rule #2 Do it now in a simple, honest and straight-forward way. Save being clever for Prom Night.