A friend is asking my advice on how to handle a family situation. She has a daughter in grad school in Florida; due to the upcoming end of term and housing situation, the daughter and her significant other need to leave Florida and come back to the Northeast at the end of April. They’d be driving, as they have to bring the car and all belongings with them (it’s unclear if she’ll return to that grad school, for reasons unrelated to Covid). They’d stop at a hotel one night on the way.
Normally, it would be no issue for the daughter to stay at my friend’s house; her bedroom is still intact and available.
However, my friend is concerned because of Covid. There’s an option where the daughter and SigOth could stay in a small cottage elsewhere in the town where the family lives. My friend wants the daughter to stay there “for a few days” and not see the rest of the family for that period; the daughter is not happy about it.
Similarly, my friend’s parents are coming home from a snowbird period in Florida soon; the parents also live in the same town. Normally my friend would see the parents almost every day; she’s unsure whether she should see them right away when they get back.
No one involved has any symptoms or major underlying health conditions; no one involved has been working (except from home) or going out much at all. The places where all are coming from and/or coming to have close to the same Covid rates (it’s not like they’re coming from a small town in Florida back to NYC).
My friend is wondering if she is overreacting; I’m not quite sure what to say. I asked her if she meant to not see her parents/daughter (except from distance) for two weeks, she said no, maybe “a few days”. I’m honestly not sure if a few days would make any difference, and I’m not sure if two weeks “quarantine” is necessary in this case. Couldn’t find any exact guidance on CDC’s website.
A friend is asking my advice on how to handle a family situation. She has a daughter in grad school in Florida; due to the upcoming end of term and housing situation, the daughter and her significant other need to leave Florida and come back to the Northeast at the end of April. They’d be driving, as they have to bring the car and all belongings with them (it’s unclear if she’ll return to that grad school, for reasons unrelated to Covid). They’d stop at a hotel one night on the way.
Normally, it would be no issue for the daughter to stay at my friend’s house; her bedroom is still intact and available.
However, my friend is concerned because of Covid. There’s an option where the daughter and SigOth could stay in a small cottage elsewhere in the town where the family lives. My friend wants the daughter to stay there “for a few days” and not see the rest of the family for that period; the daughter is not happy about it. Similarly, my friend’s parents are coming home from a snowbird period in Florida soon; the parents also live in the same town. Normally my friend would see the parents almost every day; she’s unsure whether she should see them right away when they get back.
No one involved has any symptoms or major underlying health conditions; no one involved has been working (except from home) or going out much at all. The places where all are coming from and/or coming to have close to the same Covid rates (it’s not like they’re coming from a small town in Florida back to NYC).
My friend is wondering if she is overreacting; I’m not quite sure what to say. I asked her if she meant to not see her parents/daughter (except from distance) for two weeks, she said no, maybe “a few days”. I’m honestly not sure if a few days would make any difference, and I’m not sure if two weeks “quarantine” is necessary in this case. Couldn’t find any exact guidance on CDC’s website.
If your friend is worried about catching or transmitting COVID, then daughter + SO need to spend 2 weeks isolated. Ditto for the parents. A few days is not long enough. Can your friend set up her home so that daughter and SO are isolated from her? They would have their own bath and own bedroom. Your friend would have to leave food outside their door. If her daughter might end up sneaking to the kitchen because she thinks her mom is over-reacting, then your friend should have them stay in the cottage.
The SARS-CoV-19 can be carried asymptomatically by many people and can be shed by people for 10-14 days prior to presentation of symptoms even in those who will eventually developed the COVID-19 illness. The CDC recommends a 14 day self-quarantine if you have travelled outside the US or on a cruise ship or river boat, but frankly if you’ve traveled from anywhere where strong physical distancing and isolation measures have not been enforced (e.g. Florida) then it is wise to follow the self-quarantine process. Although it was originally believed that only the elderly and people with underlying conditions were contracting serious cases of COVID-19, it has become apparent that there are many cases with no explainable or observed underlying conditions and that that anyone of adult age is potentially susceptible. Whether “the daughter” is happy about it or not, the potential for her being contagious and potentially affecting other family members after traveling should be the primary consideration and “a few days” of isolation is insufficient to be assured that the daughter and her partner are not contagious.
The pathogen doesn’t care if you are family, or that the “places where all are coming from and/or coming to have close to the same Covid rates”, or whether someone’s feelings are going to be bruised by following recommendations for self-quarantine and isolation. There are plenty of examples you can find in the news about one family member unknowingly contracting the SARS-CoV-2 virus and infecting other members of the household only to have several of them present severe symptoms and be hospitalized or die. It does not care, and so you have to if you want to protect friends, co-workers, and family members, by maintaining good physical distancing and self-quarantine procedures. And no, [POST=22230904]masks are not a reliable way to prevent contagion[/POST] in close contact unless you are wearing a respirator mask which has been properly fitted and you are following good procedures in handling and disinfecting the mask.
It’s a bit idiotic that your friend thinks the daughter should quarantine but not her parents. The parents should really stay put in FL unless they have a really good reason to travel mid-pandemic. It also seems crazy to me that the daughter (and especially her SO) would rather move back in with Mom than enjoy their own space for a couple weeks, but maybe that’s just me.
I would think the bigger concern should be with your friends parents. Sounds like they are retirees. They should be isolating themselves from everyone.
Just to add that it doesn’t matter AT ALL to the need for isolation whether anyone has any current health issues. The daughter and her SO need to understand and agree to this, so that they spend the 2 weeks in the cottage in actual isolation, and not going out and taking risks. Make sure the cottage is well supplied with the necessaries, including internet and other time-wasters. Don’t let her selfishness put the rest of your family at risk.
I’m hoping the parents are more sensible and understand the need for isolation, not just for 2 weeks, but until the shelter-in-place is over, because they live in a separate house. You can make them sick of talking to you on the telephone, or sick of seeing you on whatever online social media platform they might be able to use, but do not visit them at all. If you have to provide them with anything, leave it outside the door. Remember that every single human contact puts them at risk, at least until there is reliable and easily-available testing.
Yeah, I probably shouldn’t have brought the parents into this - my friend asked for advice about her daughter, not them. I’m not sure either way what they will do, and how much if any contact they’ll have with my friend. They do have to leave Florida though - they’ve extended their rental as long as they could.
The daughter would definitely prefer to stay at home - it’s more comfortable than the cottage, and she is close to her family whom she hasn’t seen for months. And her younger brother who is in college has been home for five weeks - but that was a different time. I’m also not sure how long that cottage would be available to them, certainly not all summer.
Trying to explain all this to a twenty-something (let alone a mother of the same)…
We are enforcing our own quarantine from our eldest because he travels so much. Due to scheduling luck, he’s here in DFW on his mother’s birthday, but ate takeout alone in his hotel room last night, while we had a small celebration here. It sucks but I don’t think the virus cares about birthdays.
We did go to the airport and wave at his plane as it landed. Obviously he couldn’t look for us or wave back, but we were below the flight path in a parking lot filming his plane. Dorky I guess, but he was excitedly texting us for the video as soon as he finished taxiing. There was an odd but really cool twist to the evening. I told him over the phone his mom’s gift was delayed until this afternoon, according to Amazon. He laughed and reminded me of the “Amazon” painted in great big letters on the tail, so he probably delivered his mom’s gift to DFW yesterday. No way to be sure, but we’re going with that.
