I can totally understand that, too. What you might be overlooking in your recent hurt is that it reflects on you too, when you slag a serious long-term relationship. I’m trying to say that it’s sort of like forgiveness; you don’t forgive for the other person, you forgive for yourself and your peace of mind.
In this case, you maybe don’t talk too badly about your ex because it makes you look bad. Maybe at this point, when the wounds are still pretty fresh, you just grit your teeth and use Dangerosa’s, “She decided to see other people.” Most people with anything on the ball will read all the subtext there.
If your anger is anything like mine was, you can start with “seeing other people” and move straight into the “we never had Mexican, he didn’t like Mexican” with a side helping of “his mother never liked me” “he didn’t pick up after himself” and a large serving of “the whole thing was handled badly” for dessert. Its like a twelve course meal of vitriol - and while there are people who will definitely enjoy your train wreck - and venting can do you some good - its probably best to save the entire rant for those who aren’t going to spread it.
I went through not just one, but two divorces within 5 years (yeah, I’m winner). My first one I was an absolute basket case both at home and at work. He left me after he got skinny and met girls online. I was betrayed and angry and hurt to the core - and I told anyone that would listen.
You know what I became? The crying girl. Or the sad girl, or the girl that got left, or any variation of that. I still think that if I had had just a little more strength or class I would have kept the details to myself because now I am way past it and I will see many of these people again in the next couple of weeks (holiday parties) and I wonder sometimes if they still see me as the broken, angry girl they saw 7 years ago.