FOR INTERNAL DISTRIBUTION ONLY
After carefully maintaining security around the Mars rovers for more than ten years,
the security staff on Mars reported a minor anomaly caused by dropping a jelly doughnut on the ground.
The staff has had a perfect record to date, and it is hoped that this one slip-up will be explained away as a “twiddledink” and nothing more will come of it.
The staffer responsible for this lapse has been sent to HR for retraining and re-assignment. After a thorough investigation, it has been determined that no mistakes were made at the senior staff level and this incident is not expected to impact quarterly management bonuses.