Alabama gubernatorial candidate Tim James is a loathsome shit.

I’ll wear the prescriptivist label with pride, for long enough to insist that “illegal” is not a noun. It can never be a noun, and I say “FUCK any attitude that suggests that it can.”

It also makes sense for the state to offer such things for benefits the individual will derive.

Asking someone? We’re using volunteers now, are we?

Well that sucks. My wife gets paid for her translation services, and the introduction of volunteers will undoubtedly drive her out of the market.

Beautiful prose.

Can’t help noticing it doesn’t exactly say why this talk about expenses is “drivel.” I mean, it’s so confident, so assured: The drivel about the expense of such translations is just that, drivel. Almost makes the reader forget to ask how and why it’s drivel, and where these volunteer translators have been found.

Almost.

At Lake Chapala near Guadalajara, the State of Jalisco provides English language driving tests for the sizable English speaking community of retirees from the USA and Canada that have relocated there.

This is done as a courtesy. Non-Spanish speakers are made to feel welcome here.

OK, tell you what: you look me right in the monitor and tell me that you sincerely believe that this is really about saving money, and, out of cordial respect, I will pretend to believe that you’re an innocent naif batting big, brown innocent eyes, as guileless as a lamb.

It won’t be easy, you having demonstrated an intelligence superior to a dish of cottage cheese and a moral sense above that of a school of piranha, but I promise to try.

Could volunteers be found, who might offer an hour or two of their time to help another? Yes, I rather imagine they might. Do you imagine that the candidate would leap at the option, relieved to have such a good thing done without burdening the good citizens of Alabama? Which would be the case, wouldn’t it, if this were only about that?

But it isn’t, now is it?

What’s the expense to the state of not licensing drivers whose English is weak? Fewer of them can get employment, pay less taxes? If this is purely a money issue, let’s do the math.

It is. And the man (I assume, Sarah Palin notwithstanding, that it usually will be a man) who harnesses it, and panders to it without reservation, will have a long career in the public sphere, if not in the public’s actual service.

Which leads to the very real possibility that what Alabama wants in a governor is a loathsome shit.

YES! This is a point I’ve made numerous times. I’m surprised to see you making it, but pleasantly surprised.

And the contractors are full of shit. I got into a n argument with an acquaintance of mine, who has a nationwide construction company. He says that he MUST use illegals or lose out on bids. My point was that if no one could use illegals then everyone’s bids would be altered equally. No answer. I think people like him have just gotten used to having the cheap labor at their disposal. To hell with them.

And I’m sure that a good part of the reason they do so is because they WANT the English-speaking to feel welcome. They want more of them there. That makes perfect sense. Smart on their part.

Well, it’s always possible that this means construction workers will start earning a living wage; but it’s also possible that this means thousands of construction companies will go out of business because the cost of new construction becomes prohibitive.

So? Some will go out of business and smarter and newer ones will replace them.

Just like Americans.

Seems to me that there is at least a reasonable argument that is should be given in English, monetary concerns and bigotry aside. Is James making it, or trying to put his changes in under cover of a monetary argument. Or are you asserting that any other point of view is racist?

Huh? You think that companies that can’t adapt to a new situation should be protected and not replaced by existing companies who can or new entrants to the market?

I think he means that old Americans and ethnic groupings die off and are replaced by new ones.

And what might that argument be? Is there something especially notable about English that enhances driving skills in some unique way? That would be an extraordinary argument, one that would offer exceptional opportunity for scorn and derision.

I think Mr. James wants it both ways, he wants to offer a signal to a resentful and irritable anti-immigrant base that he is one of them, but is constrained by the crushing power of liberal correctness from openly stating his views. At the same time, he gets to pretend that, really, its just all about fiscal conservativism. Has he offered us any reason to believe he is reluctant, that he is forced to this position due to the extravagant compensation demanded by the estimable Ms. Bricker, and no other option is available? Can he point to any outreach he has made, to seek volunteers, only to be stymied by the awesome power of the Translators Union?

I think not.

Yes. All the road signs in the US are in it, including the many that don’t have iconic shapes and colors. Not being able to read road signs does make one more of a risk to other drivers.

You have my permission.

Presumably, the exam asks, in Spanish, the meanings of the various signs which are written in English. If they get the answers correct, what could possibly be the objection to licensing them?

You guys all realize that foreign tourists can and do drive in the US with an International Driving Permit and a DL from their home country, right? No English, no sign test required, nada. I can’t tell you how many tourists from Denmark, Germany, France, etc. I’ve met driving huge motorhomes in the western National Parks who speak very little English. Similarly, we can drive in foreign countries without knowing the language. I drove all over Spain knowing essentially no Spanish.

Y’all know the numbers on speed limit signs were invented by Ay-rabs, right?