Two guys got gnawed up pretty bad in shallow. One lost an arm. Beaches closed.
CNN says this is the first “unprovoked” shark attack there in 25 years.
What the fuck is a “provoked” shark attack and why the two distinctions?
::Going to the hangar deck to say “Nyah-nyah!” to the Persian Gulf sharks::
Yikes, thats awful. I didnt realize that sharks came that close into shore. I always figured Jaws was a bit dramatic in that respect.
I knew that they sometimes came in that close, but geeesh! That is awful. I agree with you, Chief. What the heck is the distinction? And, who cares anyway? An attack is an attack!
BTW, love your comment to the Persian Gulf sharks! You tell 'em!
NOTE: No smilies were used in the preparation of this post, in deference to the Chief. smile
From what I understand, most shark attacks occur within 3-5 feet of water. As for provoked vs unprovoked, I think they mean that a diver or snorkler sees a shark underwater and is so taken by it they feel they must get closer to it or maybe some macho nimrod wants to say he touched a shark and the shark feels threatened and attacks as opposed to someone in the water, minding his own business and leaves the water minus a leg.
I can’t really imagine provoking a shark any other way. I know there are many stupid people out there, but I find it hard to believe someone sees a shark and then starts calling it names and making fun of its mother while poking it with a sharpened stick.
The exception being the ones who take a cab to your house.
Those are the really mean ones.
Please, don’t mention that! My dog was eaten by one of those. My mom answered the door, and the shark (posing as a flower delivery man) ate little Bandit when he ran out barking at him.
Land shark!
(Prionace glauca belushitus)
Pour BBQ sauce all over yourself. Raise eyebrow at shark, spreading arms wide.
Step into the water. Swim to shark and bump chests with it.
Say “Yah bitch, what ya gonna do? Ya wanna start some shit? Orca could beat your greyish ass! Hell, Flipper would pimp slap you! I’d give Charlie from Starkist Tuna a 50/50 chance against your punk ass!”
Note:You should probably pack a band aid or two before doing this.
MAN, I love working on Saturdays!
I live in Biloxi, which is not to terribly far from the attack, so people here at work have been talking about it a lot. Apparently it happened during the middle of training for a local Triathalon, from what I’ve read. So many people from the coast have been to Gulf Shores, so it’s created quite a buzz here.
I had a close call with a sand shark as a kid during a family trip out to Ship Island, a local summer get-away-for-the-day island. We had our boat anchored in the shallows right off shore, and I was playing in the water (I must have been 8 or 9 at the time), when my uncle yells at me to jump back into the boat…that’s when I see this sand shark silenty swimming right in my general direction. I’m scrambling to get up the side of the boat and my dad and uncle are grabbing their fishing gear and trying to catch it…sigh…that’s my family for you. Anyway, let me tell you, no matter how small they are, sharks are scary looking creatures, and I hope I never get as close to one again as I did that day (approx. 3 feet). They didn’t catch it BTW.
Alabama shark attack: isn’t that an old Allman Brothers tune?
And, ChiefScott, not to disagree with a sailor on matters ichthyological, but isn’t the American Land Shark (now believed extinct) classified as Prionace glauca Chevii Chaesus?
Once, around 1980, there was a 25’ great white one here who bit into a local surfer at Spanish Bay, which is where the US Open is.
I never did surf that spot again.
Alabama Shark Attack, Wichita Lineman, shouldn’t this be in the “songs you like after the male menopause” thread?
I grew up on the beach. I was a real East Coast surferdude, dude. 
Forty years in the water (surfing, fishing, boating) and I’ve seen thousands of sharks.
Surfers, not surprisingly, take a personal interest in sharks. Some people have said that the size and torpedo shape of the small surfboards used today, along with the flailing arms and kicking feet of their riders, might actually incite some attacks ( maybe that’s a provoked attack?). [Interesting aside: On the East Coast, more surfers have been attacked by bluefish than sharks.]
Not to scare anyone, but when you go swimming in the ocean, even in the break, you are almost always accompanied by sharks. Many species of sharks ( sand sharks come immediately to mind) spend most of their time in the shallow water.
That’s the bad news. The good news is that most sharks are actually pretty timid. Even children are bigger than their typical food source. They will stay out of your way. Shark attacks are exceedingly rare - you run a greater chance of getting hit by lightning than getting bitten by a shark.
Not much solace to someone who actually gets attacked, I know. My point is only that a shark attack on a human is definitely aberrant behavior for the shark. “Jaws” is mythology - sharks are not monsters.
Thank God for our cold Pacific water. Hasn’t been a shark attack in northern California in memory.
Good one, Chief Scott! Classic Belushi.
Could I add one sick, inevitable taunt to your list, Sealeon?
“Who ya lookin’ at, punk? Huh? Huh? Want a piece of me?”
Note: the above mockery is aimed solely at the concept of deliberately provoking a shark to attack, not at the people actually involved.
Veb
I hear the vegiterians are incensed.
But what are you gonna do? Sharks are too smart to eat tofu.
‘Thank God for our cold Pacific water. Hasn’t been a shark attack in northern California in memory.’
You don’t read the news much do you?
I love seeing otters & seals in the water in N Calif, cause they wouldn’t be out if it weren’t safe would they?
Wally says
Or is it, “Tofu is too smart to surf?”
ROFLMAO Seal
Um, actually Northern California has what’s called the “red triangle” this area extends from Bodega bay, out to the Farallon Islands, and down to the south end of Monterey bay (Where I am). It’s well known for large numbers of great white sharks. There’s been a couple of shark attacks in Monterey Bay. Also, up in Año Nuevo state park (a few miles north of Santa Cruz), you can see Elephant Seals with shark bites occasonally (i’ve been there a couple of times). I hear great whites hang out in the waters near the mating beaches waiting for Elephant seals.
Part of the reason this area is in the red triangle is because we have lots of seals. Great Whites feed on seals for their high fat content (and in the cold waters here, they need quick sources of energy. Also partly why humans aren’t usually eaten, not enough fat). Fortunately, shark attacks are rare, and though they do happen, the sharks would rather go after seals than us.