Hmm…how about a NEAR alcohol poisoning story?
One New Years while I was in college, I was at a party with my GF at some neighbors across the street from where she lived with her parents. I proceeded, with the help of a friend, to drink one of the big bottles of Crown Royal. You know, the one with the built in handle. Oh, and I weighed about 120 pounds at the time and my friend was about 6’4" with a proportional weight and we were matching shot for shot.
It’s very quite amazing. After a while, the alcohol didn’t seem to be affecting me. I mean, I’d drink more, but I wouldn’t get any more drunk. So, I’d drink more.
You can see where this is going, right?
Suffice it to say, I got totally, amazingly shit-faced.
My GF and her father helped me across the street, and I crashed out on their couch. Sometime during the night, I woke up/regained conciousness, and realized it was all coming back up. So (and this where it gets funny, so pay attention) I headed for the bathroom. Unfortunately, I’d forgotten where I was, and thinking I was still at the house where the party was, staggered in the direction of the bathroom.
There wasn’t a bathroom there. Instead, I ended up in the corner of their living room, blowing chunks all over one of my GF’s father’s $3000 Klipsch speakers.
After that, I went a year and a half drinking nothing alcoholic at all, and even the yeasty smell of bread cooking would make me nauseous. I still to this day barely ever touch hard liquor.