That always bugged me with Voyager too.
A rational I’ve always thought of for Alien is that the warning is in some sort of mathematical code; like the stuff we sent on Voyager, so any species intelligent enough to intercept it would be intelligent enough to decode it.
And in my happy little universe Alien3 was never made. Ripley got back to Earth with Hicks and Newt, END OF STORY!!!
It looked a lot like the alien that later terrorized the humans on the Nostromo, at least in my opinion - not exactly the same, but same exoskeleton, general head shape, etc.
I remember seeing in one of the Alien comics (canon? not sure) that when there was not a proper host for a face-hugger to implant an embryo in it could use an adult alien of the same species - I think this was only done to produce a queen, though.
The alien skeleton that was seen reclining on the large “chair” in Alien was not the xenomorph that we know and love. It was more humanoid, and the chest was definitely blown out from the inside. The assumption is that the ship was transporting alien eggs and somehow became infected. In the Aliens RPG (canon? I’unno. About as canon as you get outside of the movies, as the comics became a little … out there) it’s referred to as a Space Jockey. The phrase is used elsewhere as well.
Looked like Predator to me, which also appears in the Aliens books, as does the idea of killing an alien for the others to escape.
But I digress, the Star Trek crew seem completely unable to aim their guns straight and take forever to hit a slow humanoid, so how are they going to kill an Alien moving twice as quick (apart from in Voyager where I’m sure they would re-align the inter-dimensional space modulator to produce a harmoinic tachyon phase shift in the toaster cannons, or something simialr)? But wouldn’t you just love to see Voyager get boarded by a unit of USCM marines?
You’ve just given me my Happy Thought for the day.
Looked like Predator to me, which also appears in the Aliens books, as does the idea of killing an alien for the others to escape.
But I digress, the Star Trek crew seem completely unable to aim their guns straight and take forever to hit a slow humanoid, so how are they going to kill an Alien moving twice as quick (apart from in Voyager where I’m sure they would re-align the inter-dimensional space modulator to produce a harmoinic tachyon phase shift in the toaster cannons, or something simialr)? But wouldn’t you just love to see Voyager get boarded by a unit of USCM marines?
Aliens are Bad Guys, and so always lose.
Star Trek crews are Good Guys, and so always win.
You do the math.
I believe that the alien in Alien, on the ship with the chest blown out, looked like the xenomorphs (slightly) because the xenomorph takes on characteristics of its “host” creature. For instance, the dog-like xenomorphy in Alien3.
Kirk
Sisko would stand a chance if the Aliens infected DS9 - he and his crew seemed the most capable of handling actual combat with dangerous and ruthless aliens species. And, General Martok would provide plenty of Klingon shock troops to lay down a wall of disruptor fire to hold them back.
I just realized, if an Alien gets zapped and desintegrated, then there’s no acid blood to cause problems. I know that NextGen phasers didn’t to this anymore, but Kirk and friends vaproized stuff right and left…maybe Jimmy and Spock would come out on top.
Picard’s Enterprise, Janeway’s crew and Archer’s crew would be TOAST - none of them were shown to have the combat instincts of a drunken wombat. I am, of course, considering Worf to be part of the DS9 crew, where he was used as he should have been (as a tough warrior) instead of being the guy who never won a fight because he was always beaten up to show how powerful the alien villain was.
I’d love to see Riker hit on that female marine from Aliens
That could simply be due to the fact that H.R. Gieger designed all of the sets and creatures.
I would love to see Janeway from Voyager try to communicate with the Aliens:
“There…there…see, there’s nothing to be frightened of (gently pats Alien on the head while it is breifly confused by the fact that the humans aren’t running in terror). See, you just need to… KA-CHUNK!! AAAHHHHH!!! MY HEAD!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! AAAAAAHHHHGGGGHHHHH!!!..”
or perhaps Spock or Tuvak
“I will attempt to meld with the creature. I see…KA-CHUNK!! AAAHHHHH!!! MY FACE!!! IT BURNS!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! AAAAAAAAARGGHHHHH!!! AAAAAHHHHGGGGHHHHH!!!..”
or maybe Dianna Troy:
“I sense the creature is…happy…RIP AAAHHHHH!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! AAAAAAAAARGGHHHHH!!! AAAAAHHHHGGGGHHHHH!!!..”
(I felt that Aliens are probably happy when they are eating and reproducing)
Or Worf
“Prepare to taste my Klingon Kl’ghtmak’t fighting stick…” HEAD TEARING SOUND!! … THUD!
or how about Capt Kirk:
“Sulo…fire…phasers…and…photon…torpedos!”
and so on
C’mon keep em comin, these posts really crack me up
Aliens meet, the Borg, Deana’s mom, Wesley (kill him), Kes (kill her too), that poncy big_brested vulcan from the new series,…
Alien: ARGGHAGAH!
Picard: HELP!
Translator: G’KSH!
Alien: G’harga-kqwersa.
Translator: Oh, you’re sentient. Many apologies, my bad. Let us exchange ambassadors. Can we join the federation?
Picard: Great. Say, do you think you could help out with this borg thing?
They keep on doing it . . . because they like it.
The trek crews would be toast. These idiots can’t even handle an infestation of tribbles in the air ducts. If a few fuzzy nerf balls can threaten a ship, how are the crews going to react if the tribbles are double-jawed, 6 ft tall beasties with bad attitudes? It would be wholesale slaughter.
However, knowing the weasels…erm writers, I am sure one crew member would survive just long enough to reverse the polarity of the tachyon flow in the recombobulation matrix and thus initiate a stable temporal reset vortex to send the ship into a timeline where they never met the double jawed nasties.
Sluts.
snort! Vaquez would tear off his balls with her teeth.
The lesson I learned from the Alien movies (all both of them) was that your only hope against xenomorphs is avoiding them. Try and fight and yer gonna get chomped/facehugged. The aliens advantage is always in their numbers. Your only hope is to outrun them.
If, against very large odds, you DO get away from them, do NOT, for any reason, turn around and go back. I don’t care if you dropped your favorite spanner, pulse rifle, or 2nd lieutenant - you’ve still got all your limbs, count it an even exchange.
That would be any ST crew’s downfall - sentiment. I’ve never once heard a Federation crew member utter the words “Forget him! He’s gone!”
(Bishop knew Ripley was being stupid, going back for the kid. And she was - by all rights, she should have been chestburster-food. Which, eventually, she was.)
My understanding has been that the Aliens just hitched along on the ships of other species, not unlike rats on old sailing ships. I’ve also heard speculation that they got them off a Predator ship (because they had the extra models, or the two sets had the same designer, something like that). That’s what the crashed ship in Aliens was pointed out to me as.
Anyway… without cheating writers, the Star Trek guys haven’t a chance in hell. They simply don’t have the kind of weaponry they need to take down the Aliens. I mean, c’mon - slow firing hand phasers? Heck, even phaser rifles! It’s just pathetic. Now, the Marines… they had your basic power assault rifle/grenade launcher, smartguns (big badass self-tracking machine gun :D), flamethrowers, and so on and so forth. Basically, the high-powered, rapid fire weaponry required to rip those Alien nasties to shreds. Oh, and let’s not forget the sentry guns :D.
Ah, USMC boarding a Federation ship… drooool. Good bye, Federation!
The Borg meets the Aliens
“We are the Borg…Prepare to be assimilated…hmmm. Their blood seems to melt the asimilator aparatus… Hey! Stop chewing on that!” ZZZAAAAPP!!! KABLAAAMOO (Borg cube explodes after acid blood from Alien spills everywhere and burns a hole in something important.)
Jordi Laforge meets the Aliens
“Hey is there someone there? I can’t see you on my visor for some reason, it must be malfulfunctioning…Would you like a book to read?” WAAAAAAA!!! AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! WHAAAAAAA!!! CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP (Maybe they don’t show up on Infra Red!)
Several dozen “red shirts” stumble into an Alien Nest:
AAGH!!! Bzzzzz Bzzzzzz MY LEGS!! I CAN"T FEEL MY LEGS!!RIP CHOMP Bzzz HAAAAAAGHHHHH!!! PHFOOOOOOOSH!!! AUGH!! ITS NOT SUPPOST TO COME OUT OF THAT END!!! CRUNCH CHOMP CHOMP!!* KASPLAT!!**
How about ST Voyagers Nelix(sp?)
Crew: MMMM Nelix, those omlets were delicious.
Nelix: yes, I made them from some eggs I found while down on the planet.
I think you know where this is going…
Wesley on Aliens:
Marine Redshirt: We’ll get you out, man!
Wesley (entombed on wall by slime): Kill Me!
Riker: You heard the man, kill him!! ::Phaser fire::
Picard: Yes! High five!!!
Riker: I love these aliens!!
Marine Redshirt: It’s eating my face!!!
Picard: Quiet, Ensign, important people are talking!
Marine Redshirt: AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH*******!
That is the funniest thing I’ve read on the SDMB all week.