Am I an A**hole? Sure, but am I America's Biggest??

THAT’S exactly what I was getting at!

It would be easy to get guys on TV doing stupid things, but ONLY if they thought (however wrongly) the show was going to make them look cool.

Aholes don’t think of themselves as aholes. They think they’re cool guys and want to share their awesomeness with the world. Trick them into thinking they’re on a talent show, and they’ll gladly demonstrate their stupidity to the world. But they won’t willingly set themselves up to be laughed at.

The Goatse guy?

Just hand out fliers to everyone walking off the audition set for Jerry Springer.

I’ll assume you haven’t watched much HBO. The Sopranos is laden with profanity, and a nanny group announced that Deadwood once used the F-word an average of once every 45 seconds over the entire length of the episode.

Dude…

Don’t bother with Eharmony…

You won’t get any responses. Well, on second thought, you might corner “we hate nice guys” niche.

Let me know how it goes.

But even THOSE people don’t consider themselves sphincters. Some had to be tricked into appearing on Springer’s show (“They’re going to give you a makeover!”). Others (however absurd this may seem!) are proud of the way they handled themselves, thinking they came across well on TV.

Tell an idiot he’s going on a talent show, and he’ll GLADLY light his farts or tell sick AIDS jokes in front of millions. Tell him he’s going on a show where he’ll be mocked and called an a**hole, and he’ll pass.