In my neck of the woods, most people just call Indians “Ay-rabs”. You guys are just getting mixed up with all kinds of other folks. Of course, these are the same people who either call all latinos “Mexican” or worse, “Spanish”. (“Worse” meaning “more incorrect” not “damn the spaniards!”)
My wife is 6/8th Native American…Cherokee, Sac&Fox and Seminole. (She’s got some Scots-Irish and German tossed in.) Her skin may be whiter than mine, but she refers to herself as ‘Native’. Works for her, works for me.
Long-time lurker here, just popped in to mention that, according to the US Census Bureau’s 2005 American Community Survey (via Wikipedia), there are about 2.5 million American Indians and about 2.3 million Asian Indians in the US, so raw numbers alone shouldn’t affect our opinions either way.
Full disclosure: I’m an Indian (from India)… personally, I think everyone has a right to decide what they want to be called, and so individuals from either population who want to be called ‘Indian’ ought to be so-called.
If someone is obviously from the Subcontinent, I would never by default refer to them as “Indian” unless I knew for a fact they were indeed from India. If they were from Pakistan or Bangladesh such reference might rub them the wrong way, I suspect.
So how about “Indians” coopting the entire subcontinent, hmmm? Wouldn’t it be more sensitive to your neighbors to refer to yourselves as South Asian or somesuch?
(or your forefathers’ neighbors, you know what I mean.)
Unless the place has a sioux chef. 
The catch-all term for people from the Subcontinent is ‘Desi’ (meaning ‘from the Country’ in Hindi/Urdu). That’s generally how we self-identify when people from India, Pakistan and/or Bangladesh are hanging out together, but it’s not something that’s in common usage among non-Desis.
Isn’t that 3/4 ?
- Do you think that Native Americans should be called Indian? Not just if that’s what they want, which as I said is their right, but all the time?
Nah, just if they want. I was pretty young when Native American became the common term, though, so it’s not as though I’ve had to remind myself not to say Indian, which would make remembering to call them Indian sort of strange. I can see an older person not wanting to bother switching to a newer term.
- Do you think that Native Americans should be the “default” Indians and those of us from India should just move on?
Honestly, I have rarely heard the term Indian to mean a person like you, Anaamika, even though some of my college friends were Indian. Somehow it almost always comes out as “from India.” As in “Emily and Nisha were born here, but their families came here from India in the early 70s.” No one ever called them or their folks Indians. I guess I don’t consider anyone to be the default Indians…
That’s about as reasonable as referring to people from the US as “North Americans”
I’ve reported this post.
I think Native Americans should be allowed to be called Indian. We European Americans have given and taken away too damn much from them - would be icing on the cake to now take away the name we gave them.
Many Americans are pretty stupid, and you aren’t alone. We have little idea where someone is from if they use the word Latino (course, they aren’t choosing to give us a lot of clues either), aren’t sure what the difference between Australia and Austria are. My son is from Korea - South Korea. When I say he is Korean people ask “North or South” - like anyone ever LEAVES North Korea. I would think anyone who doesn’t look at you and be able to tell you aren’t Native American probably falls under the “Many Americans are pretty stupid” category. Indians - both Native Americans and South Asians - have fairly distinctive characteristics.
If I were you, I’d simply answer the question differently “My family is from Southeast India. Do you know India?”
Though you know, some people from the south or from Lanka might not care to have a Hindi/Urdu label applied to them. 
I think you’re taking this too much to heart. Most of the time, it’s pretty clear from context what people mean when they say Indian - they mean the indigenous people who have been part of history around here (in the lower 48) for a lot longer than we East Indians have. IME among desis it gets broken down to Punjabi, Marathi, Gujju, Mallu, Tamil, etc. any way, so I don’t feel any great personal ownership of “Indian”.
Funny, if I’m mistaken for another ethnic group, I’ll be called Latina before anything else, so I have yet to be asked about my “tribe.” In a few places, actually, the default assumption has been that I’m *West *Indian. I guess it all comes down to place, time and context. I don’t get bent out of shape about it unless someone is being obnoxious.
Personally, I have a harder time keeping straight the use of “Asian” when talking to my UK-born cousins. 
Folks up-thread have described the current state of play in the US, so I won’t beat that horse.
I’m going to suggest that this is changing rapidly, and by the time our dear OP is old the default meaning of “Indian” in most of the US will be “Bharati”.
Those of us growing up in the 50s & 60s were drenched in “Indian” = Amerind cultural memes. Lots of Cowboys & (Amer-)Indians entertainment. Every kid knew how to make war whoops & talk “Injun”. How PaleFace! Me hatem you guts. The standard “You kids! Go outside and play” activity was cowboys and indians.
Loony tunes characters (Bugs Bunny, etc.) used Amerind icons as props all the time. Probably 1/4 of episodes had some reference.
That’s all gone now.
In those days 1/3rd of professional sports teams had Amerind tribal names. Ditto many colleges. A few teams have changed names since, but (almost?) no new teams in any sports, new or old, have chosen Amerind names. It Just Isn’t Done.
The Amerind as a mainstream icon of cultural consciousness is fading fast. Unless you live near a reservation you never hear or see Amerinds as a distinct (or even recognizable) group.
Meanwhle, the stereotypical Bharati is no longer a skinny guy with a towel on his lap, a turban of sorts & a cobra in a basket. He’s either, like Apu, minding the Quickie-Mart, or he/she is in IT. In other words, he’s a mainstream generic middle class American with an odd, slightly funny, accent. Sounds largely assimilated to me.
I’m in IT, and whenever somebody mentions that somebody else is Indian, I’m far more likely to assume that means Bharati, not Amerind.
I see both these trends as only accelerating.
Point to ponder in general. Consider the differing cultural attitudes across the country as being measured by time, where current LA or NYC thinking is defined as “now”. Most of the rest of the urban/suburban country is 5 years behind, and the most backward rural places are (WAG) 50 years behind. Yep, in the most backwards places racism is still viewed as a “good” thing, but its days are admitted to be numbered; change is a’comin’. Just like the late 1950s in NYC.
Small town upstate NY is probably closer to 10 years behind than 50. So you may not see the change much on the ground where you are yet, but it’s coming.
So, Anaamika, you’ll win in the end. And your acquaintance is a jerk today. Meanwhile, the opinion you expressed in the OP is swimming upstream but the tide has almost turned.
Please acquaint yourself with the rules of posting at the SDMB, most of which are in sticky threads in About This Message Board.
Name calling is not allowed in IMHO.
I thought the notion that “Indian” was applied to the people living here at the time of Columbus in error because he thought he had made it to India was wrong. Didn’t is refer to people in dios, or “of God”? Or is that a false legend?
Anyhow and either way, I agree that you’re being too stubborn. You, unfortunately, carry an ethnicity that is a homophone - it’s a word that sounds just like another word that means something else. That means you’re going to have to explain it.
Although, frankly, I think that means he’s going to have to explain his, too. Where I live, there’s a huge Indian-from-India community not 5 blocks away. Say “Indian” here, and I’ll think naan, not frybread. The Native American Women’s and Children’s Center is a few miles away, and they’ve chose NA so as not to be confused with India-Indians.
I did at one point have one Indian-from-India and one Indian-from-North-Dakota friend in my little circle, and the two of them giggled that Mythri was “Indian-dot-not-feather” and Sarah was “Indian-feather-not-dot”. I was a little shocked by that, and I wouldn’t use it unless I knew everyone was okay with it.
Ok, I’ve read everyone’s posts. Let me hasten to reassure everyone that I am not all up in arms about it! I don’t think about it that much, just that this acquaintance of mine brings it up repeatedly.
When people ask me what nationality I am, I’m generally not thinking that much about the question and reply almost reflexively “Indian”. Like I said, if I remember, I’ll add “from India” or say “E. Indian”. Something like that. Sometimes I’ll even say “I was born in India”, because I am an American by citizenship if not birth after all.
I don’t intend to stop using the term Indian altogether, obviously, but I’ll ease up on my own feelings about owning the term. But you know, I’d understand it a little more if I looked different! As I said, I don’t look NA at all. I have been confused for Puerto Rican, and I’m cool with that, I do look like it a bit and have been caught speaking some Spanish in the past. But there are Indians here of both stripes, so I guess I can see it.
Oh, one more thing. I would use South Asian, but it’s cumbersome, and as other people have said, it doesn’t quite fit when I can just say Indian. And “Asian” doesn’t really fit, either. What comes to your mind when you think Asian? Generally not us Indians.
I suppose I could just move to England…apparently they have a huge population of E. Indians there. :wry smile:
Thanks all. I’ll relax a bit. I don’t need it to default to “E. Indian”. I would like it if people considered both, one day, when hearing the word Indian.
Thanks, Frank.
First off, good to see you posting, Mika. I hope we’ll see more of you, once more.
To answer your two questions.
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I think that Native American is the more accurate term, but I agree with everyone else who has mentioned that there is a historical precedent for the inaccuracy that bothers you. Which really isn’t going to be corrected at any time soon, alas.
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To insist that people from the subcontinent must refer to themselves as “East Indian” is asinine.
I really do think we’re stuck, for now, with a word that has reference to two very different groups of peoples. And it will be a source of confusion for years to come.
I also find that both terms to me obscure more reality than they reveal, anyways so trying to fight for a claim to being the “true” indian seems a bit silly. I don’t like Indian to refer to the aboriginal peoples of the Americas, because it posits a unity of culture and ethnicity that just doesn’t exist. Similarly, the use of Indian for those peoples from the subcontinent masks that modern India is really a union of many different, albeit related, ethnicities that have AIUI more history of competition and even warfare with each other than they do as some kind of political union.
Both uses of the word, IMNSHO, foster lazy, and inaccurate thinking, anyways.
FTR Anaamika, with the exception of your curly hair, you could pass as a Native American Indian.
Or you could quote Ben Affleck, (I’m blanking on the film)
Indian.
Dot not feather.
Since you asked for opinions, I will still offer mine.
You’re being stubborn – who cares what he wants to be called. Call him Sarah if that’s what makes him happy and keeps his friendship intact – assuming you want to keep his friendship intact.
He’s being a dumbass – why in fuck would he want to be associated with a culture so completely different from what he claims is his “to spite” someone who was confused? That’s just idiotic. Those of us who are NA tend to identify with our actual tribes more than “oh, I’m an Indian” or “I’m NA” I am often asked if I am Asian because I have the odd yellow hue to my skin (except in the summer when the sun brings out my Cherokee colouring), dark hair (although I tend to keep it in the reds) and dark eyes. I am Cherokee and Irish (and Austrian on my mother’s side, but you can’t see that in me), and when asked “oh, are you Asian?” My response is always “no, actually, I am Cherokee.” I cannot imagine saying “no, I’m an Indian” mostly because I know a lot of people from India, and I do think it’s stupid as fuck to specify India Indians vs American Indians, ya know?
The onus of specifying which type of Indian falls, not on the one from the Indus region, but the one who is called that incorrectly.
Seriously? I never ever woulda thunk it. Ah well, you’ve seen me, so I guess you would know.
I’ll take it as a compliment when people confuse me, then, and just correct them.
OtakuLoki, respectfully I disagree with your point that calling myself “Indian” is inappropriate. Yeah, I can call myself “Punjabi” which as you say is way more accurate but you would not believe the amount of people who have no idea where Punjab is or what it is. Well, maybe you would - I’m weak on geopgraphy myself. But everybody has at least some vague idea where India is.
And knowing that a person is Punjabi leaves open the question of whether they are Indian or Pakistani