**Are there secret schedules that the characters follow for the “random” encounters throughout the parks (i.e. not the planned character meals and all that), or are they truly random?
Where did you go on your 40 minute break? Are there hidden break rooms all over the park?**
These two questions seem to indicate a fundamental misconception of how characters are distributed through the parks. There may be some theme parks that have “random” encounters, and it may even be true that Disney had a “random” system in the past, but that’s not how it works. There are specific locations at which specific characters appear at specific times. It’s not a secret and it’s not intended to appear “random”. The areas at which characters appear are, for the most part, clearly marked, and you can ask an attended what times the characters will be available and they’ll happily tell you.
As for break rooms, each character location has one break room associated with it. Sometimes one break room will be used for characters working in several different nearby areas, but in any case, there are typically about 10 performers who use any given break room during any given shift. They are hidden in the sense that they are indoors and not visible to guests. They are not hidden in the sense that their purpose is made quite obvious to nearby employees.
You’ve mentioned attendants a few times - are they just the regular park workers, or does each full costume character have a full time attendant just for them?
Each character location has a group of attendants associated with it for the whole day. The number of attendants vary based on the location, but from my experience there were always at least 3: one at the front of the line, one at the back of the line, and one backstage helping performers change in and out of costume. The attendants are assigned one park to work in (EPCOT, MK, AK, or HS), but other than that there is no restriction on which attendants work with which performers.
**A female friend of mine who worked for a Disney-owned magazine said employees referred to the company as “Mouse-schwitz.” **
Lol. I’ve also heard Disney employees refer to it as “working for the rat,” which I like.
Was that you [who broke a bunch of shit 14 years ago]?
Nope, I was only 8 years old at the time.
**I’d heard that the costumes used tubes of cold water to keep the actors cool. Was that true in any of the costumes or was I told a lie?! **
You were lied to. There is exactly one role that involves a water cooling system, and that’s the drivers at the Lights Motors Action! stunt show. This isn’t a secret though; they explain the cooling system and a few other tidbits during a break in the action. There was one female costumer who claimed to have seen an experimental Baloo suit with a water cooling system, but she was a compulsive liar.
Was fraternizing with guests prohibited? Did any guests ask you to meet them after work for drinks, etc.?
Hrm, I suspect it may have been prohibited for other departments, but it wasn’t really relevant for character performers. It’s hard to fraternize when you’re not allowed to talk…
Did you ever hang out with employees from Universal, Sea World, etc?
There was one costumer I met at WDW who was also a performer at Universal, and I went a couple dates with a chick who had worked attractions at both parks. When I went to visit Special K (see next question), I learned that one of her roommates worked at Sea World, but I brought my guitar with me and she was deaf, so we didn’t have a whole lot to talk about. 
**Have you been back to WDW since your experience in the college program? If no, do you plan to go back, as a guest, someday? If yes, is experiencing WDW as a guest somehow less “magical” since you know that, say, behind this door is a row of lockers and a coffee machine, behind that door is a dumpster, etc.? **
Ah, I must give quite a bit of background info to fully answer this question, so bear with me. On the very last night of my college program, I fell wildly in love with a parade performer who shall be referred to as Special K. A very sudden and powerful connection emerged between us, so we curled up in each other’s arms on the couch and whispered sweet nothings until 2:00 in the morning. Getting up at 5:00 for my flight home was awful. “Why am I awake? Also, why am I leaving this woman behind?”
While my other Disney friendships fizzled and faded (sad, but not particularly surprising), my friendship with Special K got stronger and stronger as time went on. We had never been particularly close during the program, but we would sometimes call and chat for hours and hours, just getting to know each other better and reminiscing and stuff. At some point during Summer 2010, I decided to push all of my chips in. I called her up, and after another long heartwarming conversation, I told her that I loved her. After some tortuous hesitation, she told me that she loved me too. It was implicit that this was not meant to be a “Let’s start a long distance relationship” kind of “I love you”, but more of a “I’m really happy you’re in my life and I want to see you again” kind of “I love you.”
A few weeks later, I took a few days off work and flew down to Orlando to spend time with her. At first it was absolutely wonderful, and every moment I spent in her presence was like a birthday present and a lottery ticket rolled together. Sadly, however, there weren’t very many of those moments. In the five days that I was there, despite her best efforts to give away shifts, she wasn’t able to get a single day off. I spent a lot of time sitting by myself playing guitar.
My last full day there was very weird. She had had an overnight rehearsal (something I can explain in more depth if anyone is interested) which was supposed to end around noon, after which we could romp through the parks together before she had to go back to work later that night. The rehearsal ended several hours later than anticipated, thereby cutting into that last window of hope for spending some considerable time together. We went to Hollywood Studios, and it was a very unusual blend of emotions. There was the thrill of being at the parks again, the joy of being with Special K, the frustration with the fact that rehearsal had gone late and she was so tired she could barely keep her eyes open, and the heartache of knowing that I would have to leave the next day. That was the only time I have gone back since the program ended, and that one jaunt at the parks really does not accurately reflect the frame of mind that most visiting cast members would be in, so I’m afraid I don’t really know how to answer this question.
(tl;dr) Cryptic fell in love, visited the parks, got distracted, the end.