Amazing Race Family 11/1 - "I'm Sick of Doing Stuff I Can't Do"

Episode description from the Intarweb:

Now, IIRC, wasn’t Jurassic Park filmed in Costa Rica (Isla Nublar or whaddayacallems)? So, is there any hope at all that the Weavers might get eaten by, say, a T-Rex or something? Or maybe squirted in the face by those little poison chicken thingys? Or at the very least trampled beneath a migrating herd of horny Brachiosauri? Not all the Weavers, of course: Rolly seems OK, so I hope he gets out of harm’s way and climbs up a tree until we can go rescue him. But Ma Weaver’s hair is just a travesty and an insult to the Natural Order and if it is not contained soon it’s going to take over the world and I don’t know about you guys, but I for one will NOT welcome our new frizzy-headed overlords!

Oh, yeah … topic. (Sorry, I have medicine head and I’m little more out of control than usual.) I wrote a poem about wee Carissa but my desk looks like the Library of Congress threw up all over it and I can’t find said poem, but I’ll check back later with updates. In the meantime, though: Go Gaghans!

What, no guess about who utters tonight’s title line?
I’m guessing one of the Godlewskis. It seems like a whiney line, and they strike me as the type to get whiney when the going gets a little tough.
Definitely not a Linz.

I’ve got a feelin’ Wee Carrisa and the Gaghan Clan get sent off today. Didn’t see them in the previews(doesn’t mean much, I know), and their parents are overdue for doing something stupid. Hope not though.

I bet that rainforest does wonderful things to Ma Weavers hair. You’ll probably be able to see it from Houston.

As I recall from the previews, they do something involving carrying bananas. I certainly hope somebody says “come Mr Tally-Man, tally me banana”, cuz I know I sure would.

Oh, you just know one of those Linz brothers will be singing that song. Or maybe wee Billy Gaghan, 'cause he a good one for the singing.

I don’t wanna see the Gaghans go yet. The Paolos need to go. Now.

I’m guessing it’s Wee Carissa, as we’ve come to call her.

Oh, yeah. Forgot about that part. It sounds to me like a Godlewski or a Weaver. But wee Carissa is a good candidate, too. My goodness, I just love her to pieces! Squeeeeeeeee!

(Is it wrong for a 30-year-old woman to “Squee!” over a little girl? Not in the Bo Bice way, obviously. More in a “she’s kind of my hero, actually” sort of way. Maybe “Squee!” is the wrong word?)

I’m thinking it’s the backpack-needing, crybaby Godlewski woman. She probably whines that line while throwing her backpack down on the ground and folding her arms in a huff.

But none of them have backpacks anymore…

It was in last week’s preview, spoken by Mama Weaver, as she spins her tires in the mud.
I’m guessing tonight will be…another NEL. Naah, just kidding. But with the Paolos in first place and Team Heart Attack nipping at their heels, I’ve given up guessing who’s gonna get Philiminated. Ok, probably the Godlewskis. Or the Gaghans. (Speaking of Jurassic Park, aren’t the Gaghan kids the same age as those kids in the movie? Perhaps Carissa’s a leet hacker who’ll save the day after a Roadblock goes horrifically awry?)

Tease! :mad:

I still can’t find the damn thing, which pisses me off to no end. I can offer the following pathetic substitute to tide you over, however:

Carissa rissa bo-bissa
Banana fana fo fissa
Me mi mo missa

Or, perhaps, this:

Racing forward to the Finish Line
Towards Phil so fine
Dragging Billy to a victory
Making grown-ups squee

No…but maybe you need to get a dog. Or something.

I’ll give ya a ‘B’ on the 2nd one.
Ask for directions!
How dumb can those parents be?
Bye Wee Carissa

I have cats. Sometimes they make me go “Squick!” but never “Squee!”

That wasn’t all me. The meter and rhyme scheme come from ABBA (“Fernando”).

I was reading it to the tune of Toni Basil’s Mickey, and it’s really pretty close.

But for the love of God, not The Name Game; that song do make the ganglia twitch.

Wow, I caught myself doing the exact same thing.

Note to the Weavers: If you are “above everyone else” on account of being Christian and all, where, exactly, does standing around making fun of the other teams’ pictures fit into that? I have less against making fun of others and much, much more against people who think that Christianity absolves them of all sorts of petty behaviors like this.

It was kind of nice to see Mama Paolo get some love from her family. They bug, but it’s nice to see that they actually do respect each other a teensy bit.

Also, poor little Carrisa. It was hard to see her cry, but I’m glad that she has parents who push her to try new experiences and who are there to teach her the right lessons when she suffers disappointments. Sniff.

I think the Weavers must be officially known as the Weevils, both because of Mother Weevil’s hair and because they are definitely exhibiting the Luck of the Evil (which I think for the duration of the Race should be re-named the Luck of the Weevil). Hated, hated, hated them from start to finish tonight. From the initial demand for Jeebus’ attention to the “we were raised not to trust other people” bullshit to praying to find the red bean, haaaaaate.

I will miss the Gaghans. I’m glad that they didn’t go out on the inability of one of the kids to do a task. Damn hay bail, I mean red bean.

I was slightly confused, were the relics scattered along the route or were they just piled up at the end? Big relic piles just seem odd to me somehow.