Mad used to run these all the time.
I was leafing through the latest issue of NASA Tech Briefs which I am getting regularly, for some reason, and I came across an advertisement that at first I didn’t understand.
At a quick glance, it looked like a tribble in a giant glass cylinder. A closer inspection revealed it to be a human heart, in a system called ULiSSES, which stands for Universal Limb/Organ Stasis System for Extended Storage. Somebody stayed up late working on that acronym. This is an award-winning device for storing and transporting organs for transplanting:
Naturally, my perverse mind thought up more eye-catching and popular advertising campaigns.
Imagine a black-and-white picture of Dwight Frye as Fritz from the 1931 Frankenstein (or, perhaps better, Marty Feldman as “EYE-gor” from Young Frankenstein) carrying a brain, only instead of the heavy glass breakable jar, it’s one of these ULiSSES units, photoshopped in color into the original black and white image. Underneath the caption reads With ULiSSES, Frankenstein could have had a Normal brain.
The caption allows the ambiguity of whether the “Frankenstein” refers to the monster or the creator, while highlighting the reliability of the transporting system.
As a follow-up, you could have a shot of Dorothy and her companions from The Wizard of Oz, with the Scarecrow carrying a ULiSSES with a brain and the Tin Woodsman carrying one with a heart. (If you’re feeling gutsy, you can have the Cowardly Lion holding one with a pair of testicles). You could have the caption say something like With ULiSSES you can get your organs safely back to Kansas or Even Flying Monkeys can’t hurt organs shipped in ULiSSES.
But, no, thety’d probably think these are all too undignified for the transportation of Fresh Meat.