I was watching the news yesterday and they were showing people lined up at the post office to mail their tax returns. I filed electronically this year, so it wasn’t necessary for me. In years past, though, I’ve discovered a dirty little secret They never talk about…YOU CAN MAIL YOUR TAX RETURN ON APRIL 16th AND YOU WON’T BE PENALIZED! Hell, I bet you can mail it on the 20th and get away with it.
I’m sure The Man’s gonna come get me now, but I just had to say it!
An Arky, you have voilated all sorts of nasty bad things that we government types put in place to opress you. We’re coming for you pal. You just wait. You think you’ve had a wedgie before? You ain’t had NOTHING until you’ve had one of Special IRS Agent “Big Bob’s” wedgies. You’ll be pulling scraps of your undies out of your ass for days.
You just wait.
Oh, and uh, nobody listen to what was said. It’s, ah, all a lie. Trust the government. We would never lie to you.
Hate to burst your bubble, An Arky, but you’re not the first one to realize this. Our Perfect Master Cecil has already mentioned this.
Hmmm. No one has actually seen Cecil since at least 1996. I wonder if these are connected?
He’s next on the list. Followed by everyone who’s ever read the article. Big Bob will have his hands full.