Just got back from vacation with the in-laws…my MIL & FIL paid for basically everything (condo rental, food & supplies, restaurant meals, amusement park). My SIL has 3 children, two of whom are being raised by her ex-husband. My husband has always told me how immature and selfish his sister is, that she is manipulative and a user, but I guess I never really believed him until I saw her in action this weekend. So here’s my rant:
You are the mother of three children, not a high-school student who only has to worry about herself and is taken care of by her parents. You say, “I know I’m a bad mother”, well then, CHANGE! Do things to become a good mother!
Your children are human beings, and they are YOUR children. You brought them into this world without any thoughts of how your irresponsible behavior was going to affect them. Do you realise how traumatic it must have been for your daughter to grow up watching Daddy beat up Mommy, and then recently have to watch Mommy’s boyfriend beat up Mommy? Thank the gods that this child had the presence of mind to call 911, even if you decided not to press charges.
You have a beautiful, cheerful baby girl who is a joy to be around. I wish when you gave birth to her that the doctor had “accidentally” tied your tubes so that you can’t give birth again, because in my opinion you don’t deserve children. I get the feeling that you decided to keep this baby and not get an abortion because you realised that you could use her to milk the government (yes, SIL is on welfare/unemployment/WIC/you name it). I wish I could take your sweet little baby daughter and raise her as my own, instead of treating her like a doll or a pet (when SIL doesn’t want to deal with the baby she puts her to bed with a bottle).
YOU ARE A PARENT. Your responsibilities do not end just because you want to go out drinking or don’t feel like dealing with your children. Your children will grow up hating you when they realise that you chose partying over being a good parent, when they realise that you chose to live with an abusive drug addict instead of getting a job and your own place so that you can have a place for them to come to (the kids are not allowed at Druggie Boyfriend’s house ever since he beat up Mom in front of them).
WHY do you feel the need to get stoned in the middle of the day? If you want to get stoned, then do it socially at a party or something. NOT right before you take your children to the beach. NOT when you’re getting ready to go out to dinner. And certainly NOT when you have to care for a 7-month-old infant. In my mind, you are an addict too. And you will probably never admit to that because you don’t think it’s a problem to take a “couple hits” in the middle of the day.
In my opinion, when you become a parent, your child should become the center of your world. You should do everything in your power to care for the child, to protect them, nurture them, and teach them. Your first responsibility is to your child. You do none of these things. Your only responsibility is to YOU, and how much you can get out of other people. You spent a lot of time complaining about how small the condo was, how much better a different beach is, how it costs less to stay there, etc. etc., but you know what? YOUR PARENTS PAID FOR EVERYTHING ON THIS TRIP!! They did not have to invite your children! They could have said no when you decided to latch on! But they didn’t. Can’t you show a speck of gratitude to them?
You are nothing but a spoiled, immature, selfish, self-centered BITCH who cares nothing for anyone else. You’re fun to have fun with but you SUCK at being a parent. You are a druggie trailer-trash 'ho who needs to grow the fuck up and stop acting like an irresponsible little girl who always gets what she wants.
I wouldn’t mind her idiocy so much if she didn’t have kids. You know, there’s alway gotta be someone in the family that people shake their heads about and say, “Boy she’s got a fucked-up life, but it’s all her own doing.” But she has dragged 3 children into her miserable little fuckhole of a life and they’re getting fucked up in the process. Her older two live with their father who is a convicted wife-beater asshole redneck extraordinaire, and his sister who is a redneck cretin. My niece, who is turning out to be a bright kid (reads two grade levels above her own), is a very angry, unhappy child. She always gets blamed for everything and yelled at because she’s older and “should know better”. My nephew spends all day at home with Aunt Bitch and the TV, has no social graces and is a spoiled brat. His pre-k teacher should have her hands full in the fall. Plus they are allowed to treat each other like shit and fight at home. They’re okay if you’re one-on-one with them, but together they can be a nightmare.
I wish sometimes that I could take all three children and raise them, although it would be tough going for a while. It pisses me off to no end to see these poor innocent kids being screwed over by their messed-up parents. The only thing I can hope is that I’m giving them something or helping them when I spend time with them, and that they remember Aunt Moggy as someone who read to them and spent quality time with them and was consistently kind to them.
During the vacation I would repeat to myself, “These are not my children. My children are going to be raised differently. These are not my children. My children are going to be raised differently.” And I feel somewhat guilty for being judgemental, but fuck it! As the child of fucked-up druggie/alcoholic parents I feel I have a right to be judgemental, because I have seen how absolutely crazy things can get. And no, I won’t be “the perfect parent”. I’m going to make mistakes. But my kids will never be on welfare because I was too lazy to go out and find a job. I will never put my next hit before my children. I will never put my children through being raised watching/experiencing any kind of abuse. When my children are born, I will become a parent, and nothing will deter me from taking care of them.
'Nuff said.
