“In time you will see that this is the best thing.”
“In time you’ll drop dead and I’ll come to your funeral in a red dress!”
(my post was in reference to the Bear_Nenno wedding thread photos, in case that wasn’t obvious)
A month ago on a casual dress Friday in my company I saw this incredibly pear-shaped woman. She probably weighed 350 lbs, and 150 was in her hips. She was wearing skin-tight black jeans tucked into knee-high patent-leather boots and a tight shirt bearing the immortal words:
2 Hot
2 Be
4 Gotten
With her body shape and those tight boots she bore a remarkable resemblance to those stone-age fertility icons.
StG
Venus of Willendorf, anyone? 
I once went to a funeral in jeans and a T-shirt. The funeral was for my friend, and sometimes boss, Bob. His widow told everyone, loud and clear, that she didn’t want to have a traditional funeral, that it wouldn’t have suited her husband at all. She wanted us to show up in whatever her husband had either most liked to see us in or was used to seeing us in.
I had been Bob’s friend, assistant, and attendant. He always saw me in jeans and T-shirt, so that’s what I wore. The widow wore a cat-themed T-shirt (they raised and bred cats, and there was always a litter of Abyssinians running around the house) and a multicolored skirt that her husband had loved to see her wear. One woman came in a short silk dress with multicolored beading–a dress he’d said was beautiful on her, and that he’d wanted to see her in, but that she’d never worn in his presence. The only people who came to the funeral in traditional black were his immediate family, who he wasn’t always that close to.
I had an outdoor wedding. White dinner jackets for me and my friends, nice garden tea dresses for the ladies, mothers in hats, little girls in cute lacey little girlie dresses, you know.
My older brother shows up in a pair of cut-off jean shorts, a thrift store polo shirt and dirty brown leather shoes.
'Course, I was divorced 6 years later so maybe he was right. 
Does she happen to be a physicist? All the physicists I know (I happen to know a lot of physicists) had a thing for sandals and socks, though most of them wore black socks under the sandals.
In the very first physics class I took the professor showed up the first day in, you guessed it, black socks and sandals. The funny thing is that she had on a really nice dress and was way, way hot. But she had the sandals/socks thing going on…
Slee
Maybe she wore it to dance on his grave?
Another “I don’t get it.” When I get dressed, I dress first for comfort, but I also try to dress to look good, and minimize my … problem areas. When I try something on and it makes me look worse, I don’t buy it. I’m living for the day when tight clothes aren’t fashionable any more; I hate anything tight on my body; I get uncomfortable just looking at women wearing shirts and jackets so tight they can’t move their arms, and pants that you have to hitch up every five seconds, with your gut and butt hanging out.
At my cousin’s husband’s funeral, his - estranged - oldest daughter showed up in a black cocktail dress, with enought bling to sink Las Vegas.
I guess she figured anything black was appropriate.
I too, wish that Bear_Napples pic links were still active.
My cousin married a girl who was home-schooled in backwoods north Alabama. At her wedding rehearsal she wore hot pants and a tube top.
Think we could talk him into reposting 'em?
The scene: a service plaza on the Florida Turnpike, summer 2006. Dozens of tourists wandering around in shorts, flip-flops and assorted Disney gear. A perfectly average mom and a perfectly average dad, both dressed in jeans and T-shirts, stroll past with a pretty teenage girl … who is wearing a black halter top, black hot pants and thigh-high black boots.
I kinda felt bad for the girl. She looked a little embarassed by all the attention she was getting.
Ah, teenagers. Well I remember being down the shore one summer on a family vacation, and my older brother insisted on wearing a black long-sleeved shirt, black jeans, and heavy black boots the whole time.
We should all beg him to do so. As funny as that thread is already, the pictures do not disappoint. 
ok somebody who knows him better, send him a PM
At my second wedding my wife’s cousin turned up in a ripped-look leather jacket, black miniskirt and leather boots, boyfriend to match. Granted it was an at-home wedding, but still.
Six months later she too got married, at a church, and wore the white meringue confection dress. And the reading? The Paul bit about the husband being master of the household, hers is to love honour and obey.
I stared at that for a minute until I realised that the girl was black and that was her skin, not a third layer. And I think the red band is attached to the jacket and the jacket as ridden up that far…my god.
As an 18 year old girl, I have no idea why they do it. Living in Canberra it is currently quite cold. I wear jeans (I admit, they are too big at the moment but I wear long shirts) with long sleeved shirts and an enormous black jacket by MainPeak on a regular basis. If I’m feeling stylish, it’s a thick mod-style dress or long sleeved top and knee length skirt over bright stockings and ankle boots.
I see girls wearing short shorts and flats paired with tank tops. Uh honey, I know you just moved here from Brisbane but oh my god, did you not look outside this morning?
The worst is the people who think short shorts or denim mini skirts are year round attire; just pair them with pantyhose and flats! No. No.. NO. Just put them away and wear thicker skirts with stockings.
I’m also agog at the amount of back flesh I see on girls; I always cover that part up if my shirt is too short or my pants too low because when it gets cold, it gets painful!
Every time I see a woman exhibiting a major fashion disaster, I turn to Mr. K and say, “Hey, honey…there’s your girlfriend!”
That’s fucking hilarious! How’d he make out?