Anne Murray Must Die

My god she’s irritating!!! That commercial makes my physically ill. AND IT’S SO FRIGGIN LONG!!! What is it, about 80 minutes? And why OH WHY do they play it on CARTOON NETWORK of all places? Sorry, but I don’t want to hear her extra-bland versions of “inspirational” religious crappy songs every 20 minutes!

A lot of them are decent songs she’s destroying…like King’s You’ve Got a Friend…
I want to slap the bitch too. If she does a Beatles song, I’m tearing out my ear drums.

Uuhhhh-uhh-MAZ-eeee-iiing G-uuuh-RACE, howowowow s-UH-weet th-uuh souwound!
God, how I hate her. I couldn’t have said it better than the OP though: Anne Murray Must Die!

Exactly! Haven’t these marketing morons ever heard of “Target audience?” WTF were they thinking? They wouldn’t put 1-900-DO-ME-NOW on Nickelodeon would they? (well, maybe Nick at Night, but that’s another thread…)

Indoctrinate 'em while they’re young. They’re a lot more pliable at that age.

My son likes to make the most incredible faces at her.
Auuuughhh…my brain is unwillingly playing the whole commercial. I loathe Anne Murray. And why the fuck would I want to buy her music when I’m already treated to the whole CD in that unbearably long ad.

Thankfully, I’ve never seen the offending commercial. However, I have always been of the opinion that Anne Murray must die. My mom used to listen to that witch every damn day when I was a kid. Those kind of scars don’t heal, my friends.

i loathe that commercial and i always make sure to throw a shoe at the tv when it comes on.
it is almost like i am throwing my shoes at her head.

Well, I went to her official site to see what songs she desecrates…
Bridge Over Troubled Water-YOU BITCH!!! How DARE you? Oh man…Art and Paul can’t save us now…

Let’s get her, Kenny Rogers, Ronnie Milsap, and any other of the late night ‘music’ commercial offenders, strap them down, and make them listen to their own mysic until their ears bleed.

Dammit, Hastur! Now I have that shitty “I wouldn’t have missed it for the world” droning on and on through my brain!

WAAAAAHHH!!! Help!!!

To slightly paraphrase her hit “Snowbird”:

“So little snowbird take me with you when you go…”
Well, birdie, get crackin’.

Now I must boil my brain to get that song out.

No 'o you younguns remember when the late night music commercials were dominated by Slim Whitman.

Oh yes, there’s a medley of nauseating country favorites marinating in a dark corner of my consciousness.

Including whatever wretched song included a lyric which I thought for years went: “Put your sweet lips a little closer to the floor”.

I figured the guy had passed out and needed resuscitation.

::repressed childhood memory rears its ugly head::


::whimpers inconsolably::

To make matters worse, my dad bore a passing resemblance to Slim Whitman, and my friends would often comment on it. :eek:

Or what about…William Shatner!

crouches in the corner clutching stuffed chameleon and shivering…

Oh yes I do. DAMN YOU TBS!!

My friends and I had a good time make light of ol’ Slim.
“Rose Marieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…”

BTW, let’s not forget Boxcar Willie!

What was Rula Lenska famous for anyway?

These commercials have done much to develop my lightning fast reflexes, at least for the finger on the mute button.

Rula Lenska flogged some kind of shampoo I think, but I don’t remember which brand. Or maybe it was hairspray?

Democritus Must Die.