The only animals that are going to survive on earth are domesticated ones. Therefor we need to begin a crash program to domesticate every animal species.
Every individual human will be furnished with breeding pairs of randomly selected animals. They will also receive some basic instruction on genetics, and a cattle prod.
This is gonna be tough. There are going to casualties on both sides. Seriously, how is a 3 year old supposed to housebreak one adult leopard, let alone two?
I’ve always wanted a domesticated rhinoceros. I’d ride it to work, even down the highway. Some damn yuppie in a Lexus won’t let me merge? Well, fuck you buddy, I’m on a rhino.
I’ve always wanted to train a sloth to be much more slothful. Except when it comes to doing my laundry. Then I’d pretend I was a predator to make it move faster. Well, to make it move.