Another neighbor question: kids, dog, balls over the fence

In My Humble Opinion
1

Seeking opinions as to how you would deal with this situation.

We are a couple in our 60s, living in a suburb of Chicago. Houses are on approximately 60’ wide lots, most back yards are fenced. Maybe 2 years ago a couple with 2 young boys moved next door. The boys are now approx aged 4 and 6, and both profess to be deathly afraid of dogs. We have a stupid goldendoodle. I’d bet large sums that he would never bite anyone, but I never trust any dog completely, especially if he is in his backyard and someone enters. Moreover, my dog does bark, which might startle someone. And he has gone deaf, which I feel increases the chance that he might get startled.

The neighbor boys play a lot of whiffleball in their yard. They set up in a way that our fence is the home run. They could easily set up such that they are aimed away from our fence.

A year ago or so, the dad initiated a discussion about when balls came into our yard. We didn’t want to be the cranky neighbors, so we said they could come in to get their balls, but they should make sure the dog isn’t out, and be especially careful that they latch the gate when leaving.

Over the year, the boys have gotten bigger, and the balls in the yard more common. Yesterday, the dad was playing with the 2 boys and 2 other kids. We realized the ball had come into our yard as we heard the dad talking the kids through getting it. But we were surprised when all 4 kids trouped into our yard, with the smallest at the end exclaiming, “What if the dog suddenly pops out?” And another kid exclaimed, “They have a hammock!”, which suggested to us that they were conducting something of an “explore” rather than simply getting in and out as quickly as possible. I don’t want them to be tempted to come back in to use the hammock. And, of course, it doesn’t take 4 kids to get one ball.

We were on our back porch with a sliding screen door, such that we could hear/see this all clearly. My wife stepped out and said something to the dad about our dog being deaf, and our desire that they realize that a dog might get startled in their own back yard.

But after, we realized we’d really prefer that the kids not come into our yard. So - without making this longer than it already is, how exactly would you phrase/convey that? I was thinking of telling the mom or dad, “Over the past year our dog has gone deaf, and we want to be sure he does not startle your boys. If you would text us when the ball comes over the fence, we’ll toss it back over.” But I’m not sure ANY approach is perfect.

2

The grandkids of our neighbors sometimes hit balls over our (tall) fence. We throw them back when we find them, but our gate is locked so they couldn’t come in.

The kids should have enough balls so they can keep playing if they lose one, and you can throw them back when you find them. If they run out of balls consistently they might figure out to hit in another direction. We lock our gate so we can keep our doors to the backyard open without worrying about people coming in.

3

Yep. Lock the Gate. Put up a no trespass sign.

If Dad knocks on the door and asks then give your number for texts.

If you’re not home, during…well, you takes yer chances. You’ll wait for the ball.

4

If you explain the change to Dad as more about being concerned your aging deaf dog might be startled into hurting one of the kids and this is for their safety that’ll probably go over better than “I think your kids & their friends are casing my joint.”

And of course you’ll return every ball you see. When you see it. Which might be a day or two. You’re happy that happy kids are playing outside. But you’re not their ball valet.

5

One issue about locking the gate is, we do enjoy being able to go in/out of our yard without hassling with a lock.

At the risk of revealing myself to be the cranky old man I likely am, I previously posted about these kids screaming. I don’t think the parents are teaching/disciplining the kids in the way we felt best. With the result that I don’t feel any “affection” for these kids. But I don’t want to be critical of my neighbors, nor do I wish them to be my friends. I just want to smile and wave, say, “Hey neighbor!”, and both of us maintain our properties.

I do wonder why they do not have the batter stand so they hit the ball into a dogless yard. And there is a large grassy school yard with backstops and batting cages less than 100 yards from their house…. But, from what I’ve overheard, my impression is that they try to hit “home runs” over our fence.

6

If it were me, I’d get a whiffle bat and launch them right back over the fence, but I’m rather a sport myself.

7

As an add-on question, if he tells the neighbor and puts a lock on the fence, and the kids hop the fence anyway, and one of them gets bitten by the startled deaf dog, who is at fault? Is the dog owner legally responsible since he did everything he reasonably could to prevent it from happening?

BTW, my daughter is fostering a labradoodle, and it aggressively went after my 12-year-old grandson the first time they met. It was probably abused by a boy or man at some point, since my daughter had no problem with the dog. The point is that ANY dog can become aggressive towards a human for one reason or another.

8

IANAL but a general perspective from daytime shows would be that the children’s parents are responsible if the gate is securely locked and maintained with a big ‘Beware of Dog’ sign and repeated warnings to the family about the dog.

9

I would think so, too, but what if the kid can’t read yet and hasn’t been told why the gate was locked?

10

“Here. Merry Christmas!! Check in with me periodically and I’ll get the ones back to you that ended up in my yard:”

ETA: and then, I’d probably put a lock on my gate.

11

And I’ve heard different about the sign. It shows that you are aware it is viscous thus a danger to people.

Why can they not get some wood and mesh and build a screen?

12

I am so very glad I’m not a kid anymore…

I was in the neighbors’ yards (and pastures and driveways and…) all the time when I was a young ‘un.

13

We had to temporarily extend the height of our fence for this reason. We nailed some 6-ft tall boards to the fence posts to make them about 5-ft taller, and stapled chicken wire between the boards. We could have used more attractive mesh or netting, but chicken wire is what we had on hand. No more balls ever left the yard - including basketballs. The setup is simple to remove when you don’t want it anymore. If you hung up dark netting, you’d hardly even notice it. I’d do it if I were you.

Great idea!

14

It might be a code violation to build a fence above a certain height in that jurisdiction.

15

You are being very reasonable and not cranky to ask the dad to please not let the kids come in the yard because you’re worried about the dog getting startled. And then throw any balls back over when you see them and you have a minute.

You start appearing cranky if you put up “no trespassing” signs and locking the gate, as some others have suggested. That’s probably normal in suburban/rural areas with more space, but urban living on 60’ lots means accepting that we’re all in each other’s business a little more, unless you want to be considered the neighbor crank.

If you walked in someone’s yard and saw something you thought was cool, you’d think to yourself “look at that!” but probably wouldn’t blurt it out. Kids that age have no filter and just say what crosses their mind. It doesn’t mean they were casing the joint or exploring.

16

To me, the “four kids came into my yard” thing crossed some sort of blurry line.

We were kids. We played ball. The ball went everywhere. One of us always went and got it.

I lived in a single-family detached house with a back yard almost 20 years ago. On three sides of our house were multi-family housing (ie, attached condo’s, apartment buildings). Somebody was always in my back yard “looking for their cat.” It got a bit ridiculous. I suspect they all may have had some understanding with the occupant who lived in that house before us, but they presumed to be grandfathered in.

It made us quite uncomfortable. It was also never possible to know who was actually a good faith neighbor and who was … well … somebody else with bad intentions (which eventually happened, as one ‘somebody else’ tried to jimmy open the window to our bedroom while we were sleeping).

17

This is the right answer, IMHO. Start with that and if it doesn’t work for some reason, then it’s okay to become the cranky old geezer you are. [said from one cranky old geezer to another :slightly_smiling_face: ] No need to lock the gate or make any change from your side of the fence at this point.

18

Not to say this is true of the OP, but you can build non-privacy fencing in some cases that would not be permitted for privacy fencing. This could be a case of that.

19

Our thinking very much.

As kids, there were some neighbors who said we could not enter their yards. Now, 55 years later, I still think of them as cranks. All things equal I’d prefer to not be considered (rightly or wrongly) such a crank. But the 4 kids seemed a bit much, especially when the littlest screamer shouted out his purported concerns about the dog.

The previous neighbors had 2 older boys. They loved our (previous) dog - would watch him when we vacationed. We asked them to use our gate so they did not climb the fence. Never an issue.

Wife and I are both lawyers, tho not personal injury. Dog bites are one of the few areas in which strict liability is often applied. In fact, the dog can be considered an “attractive nuisance.” Basically - absent some unusual circumstances - if your dog bites someone, expect to be held liable.

But, like I said, it is not my specialty and laws can vary so I don’t wish this thread to devolve to a discussion of dog bit liability.

Very much so. Like I said, I’d bet a good share of my net worth that this pup wouldn’t bite anyone. But I don’t completely trust ANY dog. Especially one that cannot hear my commands. And if a kid is startled, there is nothing stopping the kid from CLAIMING a dog bit him (as happened to us several dogs ago.). I want to be a good neighbor. But I want to avoid unnecessary expense/legal entanglements far more.

They market all kinds of sports nets for residences. Or they could face the other way. Or they could go to the schoolyard. But they don’t seem to consider it an inconvenience to them to have the kids hit it over the fence and traipse into our yard - while proclaiming fear of our dopey little dog. :roll_eyes:

20

The other thing I think about is … the more people – people who aren’t you, your wife, or your family, and who enter and exit your yard through the gate – the more chance that somebody doesn’t close the gate behind them.

And you have a dog.

A dog who’s losing his hearing at this point.

Our dog only ever ‘got loose’ once – when a one-time-use landscaper didn’t close the gate after mowing our lawn (we were out of town for a few weeks).

I’m very fortunate that Sam a) didn’t get hurt, and b) came home on his own.